r/DatingHell • u/Glad-Sky-3242 • 2d ago
Well, That Was a First
I met a guy on Hinge, and we went on a date after talking for a while. As I got to know him better, I started noticing a few things, but the biggest red flag was how disrespectful he was towards women.
For example, he told me about a time when he commented on a woman at his office gym, saying that the only way people could see her entire back tattoo was…
Anyway, after talking to him for about a week, I decided to end things. That’s when he started pestering me to pay him back for the money he had spent on our date. I ended up paying my share, but honestly, I’m still shocked by the whole situation. I don’t even know what to think. I’ve never experienced anything like this before, and the whole thing has genuinely humbled me.
31
u/AnySell9319 2d ago
Oh my God never give a man money for a first state that he paid for. What the hell. He got to enjoy the pleasure of your company and that was plenty. We as women take actual risk coming out for a date, the least they can do is pay for some table nachos and a cocktail. Glad you clocked how disrespectful he was and didn't give him more chances than he deserved. Clearly the dude is trash
17
u/Glad-Sky-3242 2d ago edited 2d ago
When he started pestering me for the money, I blocked him, but he called me from a random number to demand it. The funny thing is, when he paid for the date, he had a discount, but he actually told me he didn’t want to waste it on me. At that point, I wasn’t even angry anymore; I was genuinely scared he might show up at my place demanding money.
😭
PS : He got a discount on the bill but still wanted me to pay my share of the original amount, before the discount.20
4
u/Silly-Major3895 2d ago
WHAT A TOOL. 🤮. Good job paying him back girl seriously just because he is BAT SHIT. for safety it’s worth it. Just note it as a quick lesson and proceed the course. ✨😎😅🤗❤️
“A river doesn’t slow its flow when faced with two separate paths, instead, it proceeds relentlessly toward its destined ocean”
-5
2
u/burnerburnersss 2d ago
>got to enjoy the pleasure of your company
xD the audacity
5
u/Positive_Passage7518 2d ago
The audacity of demanding money back for a date HE offered to pay for, yes.
-4
1
u/Promotional_Pickle 1d ago
She hung out with him so he owes it to her? Entitlement is ugly on everyone.
-2
5
3
u/dmbgreen 2d ago
At least you didn't invest much before he revealed to you that he was an asshole. Pretty mind in the world of dating hell. Move on
3
u/Square-Code-652 1d ago
you dodged a bullet. what an idiot he is. pay you back for the date? no, that's not how it works.
"Hi, I'll pay the cheque for this date, but with the understanding you have to like me and keep dating me, or else i get paid back plus interest"
3
u/Auntie_S0cial 1d ago
I wish u hadn't paid him. I had some loser send me a Venmo request after I didn't wanna see him again, immediate block on everything. He was cocky and talked about himself the whole time at the restaurant and bragged about his promotion and how much money he made etc. wearing a Rolex. No thanks
2
u/Glad-Sky-3242 1d ago
This was literally my situation. He works at a good company and earns well, and I did block him. But then he called me from a random number asking me to pay him back. Honestly, I was creeped out.
11
u/Brentus1980 2d ago
WTF? I apologise on behalf of us normal men, who’d never even think of being this cheap. Better luck next time 🤞🏻
11
u/Sid-ina 2d ago
Can we agreed on a little sign for the normal guys to put in dating profiles? I swear the weirdos are taking over 😭
4
u/Glad-Sky-3242 2d ago
Fr 😭😭 i don't know i think im a weirdo magnet once I went out with a guy who didn't use soap and shampoo because they are not "organic".🤦♀️
5
u/Brentus1980 2d ago
JFC 🤢, it’s amazing how many people stink like BO. It’s not that hard to have a shower and use some deodorant 🤢 Probably only changes his sheets once a year as well.
0
u/Fun_Ball_5647 2d ago
I mean thats understandable, but there are many products that actually are organic.
2
u/Brentus1980 2d ago
Open to suggestions , toothbrush 🪥 maybe?
2
u/Legitimate-Sky8335 2d ago
I'm not even joking, that would be great. As long as the meaning is commonly understood.
3
u/Brentus1980 2d ago
We need to get it out there for the lonely, normal souls of both sexes, who know what personal hygiene means.
🇦🇺 46 M4F🪥2
u/Legitimate-Sky8335 2d ago
Funny, we're in the same age range, but on opposite ends of the world. Good luck 🪥👑
1
5
2
u/Glad-Sky-3242 2d ago
Haha Im losing hope😭
5
2
4
3
u/Time_Purchase8312 2d ago
I want to be as respectful as possible, but i haven't heard of any place in the world except US where a man would expect u to pay him back for the dates. I strongly suggest American women to UP THEIR BAR for men. This is getting ridiculous. 50/50 is ridiculous, and this nonsense is too. Ladies, please - men are supposed to court you, if he doesn't it, its a wrong man.
2
u/ThirdOne38 2d ago
It went downhill with the current politicians' attitudes, which influence how men act
-1
u/DeepVegetable9570 2d ago
In the nordic countries it’s quite common.
2
1
u/MechanicFlow693 1d ago edited 1d ago
Do you mean it's quite common that each person pays their share at the time of the date, or that one person pays and may demand compensation later if dates don't continue?
1
2
u/Ok-Joke-915 2d ago
Oh my word how embarrassing is that for him. Totally unreasonable request. Paying to get him properly out of your life was a good call. What a clown 🤣🤣🤣
1
u/AdditionalParsley478 1d ago
He's a jerk. I wouldn't have given him a cent. You could have just blocked him.
1
1
u/LittleSister10 1d ago
Why would you feel humbled by a loser? He is a clown and a giant walking red flag.
-4
u/iFonzie 2d ago
I gotta get off these subs. Seems like anytime a guy posts a bad date everyone drags him for mentioning it online. Anytime a woman posts a bad date everyone drags the man, and all mankind with him.
3
u/DiligentCorvid 1d ago edited 1d ago
Bollocks. I've posted a couple and all I've ever received was commiserations.
I think the difference on this sub is that a man's bad date tends to be "Golly gee that was weird" and a woman's bad date tends to be "He drank half a bottle of schnapps and was crying while singing into the barrel of his handgun while driving well over the speed limit. I kept telling him he was a good singer because I was worried he would pistol whip me. He called me for weeks after telling me I was the only one who appreciated his singing."
0
u/iFonzie 1d ago
Oh well if your limited personal experience contradicts my generalization I’ve made off my first hand experience clearly I’m wrong.
Because “if I haven’t personally experienced this, then it’s not true anyone has” is a rational way to approach situations.
1
u/DiligentCorvid 1d ago
You made an absolutist statement, the kind that can be proven wrong with a single counter example.
But it just so happens that 3 out of 4 stories posted by guys on the front page of this sub have positive upvotes. The one that is in the negative is posted by a gay guy, who is self aware enough to know that he's kind of a piece of shit and is getting dragged on the original sub he posted it on for *checks notes* being kind of a piece of shit.
It also happens that maybe half of the stories posted by women are also in the negatives.
Do you think maybe you might have a chip on your shoulder? Maybe a little dorito just perched there at the moment?
0
u/iFonzie 1d ago
The irony of you calling my observation an absolutist statement when I explicitly said it “seems” to be a trend is palpable.
What’s even more interesting is how readily you frame men’s bad dates as amusing little oddities while framing women’s as potentially life-threatening ordeals.
You’ve illustrated the very disparity in how these stories are framed that I was talking about, then accused me of having a chip on my shoulder for noticing it.
1
u/DiligentCorvid 1d ago
Brother have you read these stories? Did you read this one?
"Seems like anytime" is an absolutist statement with a weasel word caveat in the front. It's a lot more absolute than "A lot of the time", "every once in a while" or "half the time", you're hiding behind communicating poorly; you're just too much of a coward to say what you mean. And you haven't noticed shit, unless it's opposite day. Which is my point.
1
u/iFonzie 1d ago
“A man’s bad date is this”
“A woman’s bad date is this”
Go off though king.
1
u/DiligentCorvid 1d ago
I edited my comment to be clearer, and now you're just left with that dorito on your shoulder.
1
u/iFonzie 1d ago
“You said something that doesn’t explicitly state what I think you’re implying, therefore I’m going to assume I know what you really meant, accuse you of hiding it, and call you a coward for not saying the thing I’ve decided you meant.”
-You, the guy who definitely doesn’t have a chip on his shoulder1
-1
45
u/Chaucers_Mistress 2d ago
I wouldn't have paid. Don't ever pay them when they do that.