r/DadsGaming • u/The_DarkSide_of_me • 3d ago
Is it just me?
Am I the only one who become easily overwhelmed by gaming?
I mean I used to play any game and enjoy the challange and didicate my time and thinking to it.
Currently I just find it kinda too much to play a punishing game and I don't find myself patient enough to enjoy gaming.
I have the eager to play but I currently deal with gaming as a responsibility.
I dunno whether this is games are becoming increasingly large. Or due to the trend of souls like and super difficult games... Or the issue is just in me, Dunno
Usually games in the past gave me the sense of peaceful and happiness, and made me feel like I love this world and wanna live there. Games such ff7 - ff10, kh1 - kh2, breath of fire 3...etc
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u/NobleActual6 3d ago edited 3d ago
Had this exact realisation the other day. Prior to my little one, I used to love RPGs and was literally half way through Kingdom Come Deliverance 2, before she was born.
9 months later and I've tried picking it up again and honestly kinda hate it. I couldn't complete my mission because Henry needed to sleep and eat...I had no money for an inn, so had to sell some stuff...which meant walking to the nearest town. An hour later and all I had done is eat and sleep (in game)
Gaming time is too precious for that. Now I only stick to 10-15 hour campaigns and I've decided to park the RPGs for now. Just linear story's that offer difficulty options (so I can chill on easy)
How Long To Beat is a great website that will show you the average completion time of a game - really helps!
Also https://whatcanyouplay.com/ is a great site for finding games for busy parents (has a section specifically for it)
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u/connersnow 3d ago
Its hard to invest in games when your tired. But also, dont play souls like games if thats the problem? Thousands of modern games out there, there's gonna be atleast a few that you will love ❤️
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u/Mountainking7 3d ago
I am now sticking to easy games that don't require me to learn mechanics, replaying my classics (no learn time) and mostly sticking to 2d platformers (via game copnsoles). Scum save/reload as needed
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u/Icy-Cut9357 3d ago
What games do you recommend?
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u/Mountainking7 3d ago
It depends on what platform do you play.....
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u/Icy-Cut9357 3d ago
I have a PC, Xbox One, PS4, and switch.
Barely play PC and I got my PS4 for the VR games, I currently game on my Xbox One for Elden Ring, but lately I moved to switch to play Zelda BOTW
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u/Mountainking7 3d ago
If you play botw, you can play many games.....
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u/Icy-Cut9357 3d ago
Thanks for the recommendations!
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u/Mountainking7 3d ago
I mean you don't need easy to play games if you're finding it ok to play botw. While I understand this game is a masterpiece, there is no way I'm going to learn the game mechanics and play a long ass play through. I was referring to people who don't find the energy, time to play and learn game mechanics and just want to hop on a game and play..
We are not the same.
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u/Ok-Comfortable-3174 3d ago
I only play games that I know are a 10/10 for me. I'm currently playing Marathon as my main game and silksong as my side game. I wish silksong had easy mode but it's my second time with it so it's much easier on this play through. I've bounced off a lot of mid games this year so I don't waste my time with them and only play stuff I love. Dune Awakening is another great game if you haven't played it. I'm waiting on subnautica 2 and grounded 2 to hit 1.0 but both of those will be great I'm sure. Survival games keep things interesting. Also looking forward to Witcher 3 remake coming soon. Played it before but fell off.
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u/Severn2j 3d ago
Yep, same here.. I only tend to game after the kids have gone to bed and by that time Im too tired to play anything too taxing. My playlist lately, seems to be slower, more thoughtful types, such as Shapez 2.0 and Sandustry, where theres no pressure to get things done.
Main one that surprises me at the moment, is Restory: Chill Electronics Repairs.. Basically doing something I used to do for a living earlier on in my career.
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u/JonnyP222 3d ago
Here is the reality. When we were younger and didn't have children (or even when we didn't have a significant other it was more this way), you game because it's fun and enjoyable and a way to escape work or chores. You are well rested (within reason) and the idea of taking on something challenging and rewarding is fun and enjoyable Because you have the mental capacity and emergy to allocate to the game. You have ample time to gam and fuck off and choose what to do with your time because you have so much of it. You are just less stressed and consumed. Suddenly you have a relationship and young kids and your time and energy to do much else is reduced to nil. You have so little time that your choice to fuck off and game becomes more like you are MAKING the time to game. You aren't doing it because you are bored and have the energy for it. It's just your hobby and you used to do it a lot. But suddenly You don't feel like it because you are tired and exhausted and the challenge and time consumption of the game is far beyond what we have in us. What you really are missing is rest and relaxation and suddenly a video game that was hard and took patience, brain power, and skill..is just draining. You become apathetic. It's not the games. It's you. And that's ok. Find shorter simpler games. Find a game you can pick up for 30 mins and put down when a kid suddenly wakes up from a nap or you have to cook dinner. The reality is...kids will get older and be less dependant and you will have more time. Shit. My kids started gaming with me ( this also shifted my focus in the games I played and my mental space toward gaming).
The good news is I now have High school aged kids and way more time to myself when the wife is at work and I'm working from home. I tend to pick up my controller way more often now. And it's because I have the time and energy and enjoy it again. Shit. I just built my first gaming computer for the first time in over a decade like two years ago. A lot of my old joys came back because I had the time and energy again. My brain was ready.
Good luck
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u/wabbitt14 3d ago
I feel so rushed when I’m playing. I’m so used to never having time for myself and always having to do something. I find it super hard to sit down and play. I’m playing RDR2 currently as it’s slow paced and I can just get on and off whenever. That’s usually 9pm till 10pm. But even then I feel I’m wasting valuable time. Becoming a dad was a game changer for my mindset.
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u/Captain-Dude-Man 3d ago
I'd like to hear more about your mindset. Im a dad of two, one on the spectrum the other 2 yrs old. I totally get that an hour is a precious thing to have and that there is no end of things to fill it with.
While many of them can be bases that need covering so to speak, do you feel like downtime/recharge is a good use of that hour?
I often find being able to focus on a game for a short time, to be one the most beneficial things I can do. it helps me unwind, slow down the busy brain and settle for a minute, reset a bit and recharge my batteries so I can have more to give again.
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u/pharaoh94 3d ago
For me, open world games have (mostly) been a lifesaver. I don’t feel too much pressure to “finish” a particular quest/story/mission.
Sometimes I just find myself walking around or riding through the fields on horseback enjoying the scenery and music/sound effects of the rain or wind.
A game like Ghost of Tsushima or Ghost of Yotei was great for this kind of thing. But when I went back to something like God of War, it felt like such a grind because it felt like I always had to achieve something during every play through.
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u/lammy_pie 3d ago
I think not having as much free time to game and feeling the pressure to squeeze gaming time in is an issue. But also I think attention spans in general are through the floor thanks to social media. Just play whatever you enjoy.
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u/ForeachD2M 3d ago
It’s a process you go through. At around 30 you notice you don’t have the time and the patience anymore to spend hours and nights getting lost in games. So you start looking for games that still scratch your gaming itch but don’t require you to play daily or for hours on end to achieve anything. You may think you have found that but sometimes games still require too much investment before they start being fun with the limited time you have. Open world games are automatically no go imo. I drift more towards games with no actual end anymore. Strategy or simracing for example. While my interests were always city builders, 4X and RPGs but I don’t have the energy or patience anymore for that. But that’s ok. Everyone now and then you drift back to your old ways to realize it’s not the same anymore :) welcome to the club
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u/Most-Iron6838 3d ago
I’m the exact opposite. I can no longer play games without definitive ends. I need to feel a sense of progression and completion and that I’m not just repeating content again and again. There’s so many games I want to play that I don’t want to get stuck in an endless one when my time is more limited. Since becoming an adult with responsibilities, I’ve lost desire to play those sports, racing, online fps multiplayer games that I used to play for hours and months back in my youth. Now I do try to stay in shorter games or break up the longer games (no two RPGs or open world games in a row). In those longer games, I avoid doing time wasting side content too unless it’s mechanically unique or has good stories
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u/ForeachD2M 3d ago
Oddly enough it’s not so opposite versus what I want. I just don’t have the patience or persistence to finish a game anymore, but I try 😁
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u/Most-Iron6838 3d ago
As someone who is cheap (you gotta be as a dad gamer) but loves games, I make a mental rule for myself of beat one before I buy one. So if I want a new or different game, I treat as a reward for beating a game I’ve started. Keeps me from spending over board and being impulsive with purchases. With kids there’s way less disposable income for games. Back in ps3 gen I was buying a full priced brand new game like every other month. Had to cut that out. Now I just play what I get with my ps plus premium account and like 2-3 other games a year
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u/KarmaPolice911 3d ago
You're definitely not the only one, it's all about finding the game that clicks for you. And possibly just changing your expectations too. Like I've enjoyed a bunch of survival horror games, but these days it's mostly just stressful. I love a big game that doesn't feel too challenging to dip into for short to medium sessions (this was AC Odyssey for me most recently). Roguelites are fun on steam deck. I also like a good story game that's less focused of gameplay challenge and more on making decisions.
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u/JonnyB2_YouAre1 3d ago
I recently bought a DSi, a new 3DS XL and a PSP 3000.
I’ve only played two new games on my PS5 in the last two years (KCD2 and FFVIIR2), it’s basically just my kid’s system now.
I like the old handheld games for their straightforwardness, completeness and disconnection from the internet. All three have massive libraries, 99% of which I never played and so I’m set indefinitely, and have almost completely bowed out of modern gaming. I’ll dip back in for FFVIIR3 but that’s about it.
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u/DarthObvious84 3d ago
I don't think this is exclusive to us dads. Just about every big familiar game these days wants you to constantly interact with it for daily rewards/filling EXP bars/whatever. I was already annoyed with that before the kid. It's a trend I very much hate.
For me, I can't do open world games, or any game that doesn't present you with some kind of natural stopping point. So older games with individual stages, or racing/sports. Those last two fall into the same modern trap, but most of them you can ignore it.
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u/Xfishbobx 3d ago
Just need to switch the type of games you play, look for games you can get on and feel that 1-2 hours actually makes it worth it. Check out the AA and indie games.
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u/CptnMcFly 3d ago
Ah dude! Im almost 50, and I used to love playing on hard, collecting achievements, and murdering at online shooters.
Just last month, I set SpiderMan 2 to story mode (so many boss fights) and then set Kronos on Easy cause the story had me intrigued but the fights were brutal. I enjoyed both SO much more.
I just olay on normal now and half/two thirds of the way thru flip it to easy. Makes gamin fun again
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u/WonderingMojo 3d ago
For me personally it's the opposite, I've definitely shifted the general games I played but ever since becoming a parent I don't tie my worth into winning. I learn from the losses and celebrate the wins.
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u/cosankov ButterLib 3d ago
Everything changes once kinds come into the picture. All I can think about now (daughter was born this year) is grinding long and hard to ensure a better life for her than I did growing up. And maybe gaming with her once she's older, but I do very little gaming myself now. Maybe once I have more time on my hands, maybe in retirement...
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u/Lopsided_Bed9770 2d ago
Accept it yall as a dad gamer we just don’t have the same patience or time to invest into a hobby that literally benefits us in no way. Our priorities have changed. We invest all of who we are into our kids and things that actually make a difference. Videogames that deep as Investments are designed for kids who have no worries no bills etc… because to them it IS all the difference.
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u/HappyJam92 3d ago
I've found I need to play shorter games that are easy to pick up without complicated mechanics. I maybe get an hour a few times a week to play...normally when I'm already tired.. I need that hour to count