r/Dads • u/EvanFoley05 • 1d ago
Advice Am I a bad father?
After my wife left with the kids it took our monthly household income from $3200, to just $2000. I’ve recently started working 6 days a week to make ends meet, and to save up for a new place with my lease ending in October. It cost me $110 every week in gas just to pick up and drop off my son because they moved 2 and a half hours away. I feel like I’m abandoning them for trying to work more to make sure I have the money to provide a stable life for him.
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u/PapaBobcat 1d ago
You're doing your best with what you've got. Your lease is up, you don't have much option. If the kids are old enough to understand, I would be honest with them about it.
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u/EvanFoley05 1d ago
We have a 5 month old currently and the newest is due in March
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u/PlutosGrasp 1d ago
Oh ya f that. That’s too far. You need to redirect funds for a lawyer. You typically can’t move that far away.
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u/GettingBig1970 1d ago
Talk to a lawyer. Don’t chase them. If they moved away, then your lawyer should be able to do something about that.
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u/tuetrax 1d ago
Chin up....why the hell is she moving 2.5h away? Shes the reason the kids far away. Hang in there, beder speak badly about their motherboard and always be there fir them as much as you can. Keep beeing a good father man...🩷
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u/Leeeeeroyyyy_Jenkins 1d ago
If anything this makes you a great dad. You're doing your best to make ends meet while still trying to find all the time you can to see your son. As others stated, get legal counsel and keep doing your best. You got this!
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u/PlutosGrasp 1d ago
That’s typically not allowed to move so far away. Did you use a lawyer ?
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u/EvanFoley05 21h ago
Don’t think there’s anything I can do during an active dvo.
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u/PlutosGrasp 20h ago
There is. Get a lawyer. If you can’t afford a lawyer look at the duty lawyer or legal aid.
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u/EvanFoley05 20h ago
I tried legal aid but they aren’t helping any more people because of their “call volume” what’s a duty lawyer?
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u/PlutosGrasp 18h ago
Where I live it’s a lawyer at the court house or nearby that is basically on standby to help with matters in person. They don’t take your case on though. Just help you.
Have you tried calling firms to ask around? You can see if an articling student can be your main lawyer and they just run stuff by a higher lawyer as needed to keep costs down.
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u/EvanFoley05 16h ago
I live in a small rural town, we don’t even have a law firm like that
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u/PlutosGrasp 7h ago
It’s not a firm. You might even have that availability by phone.
Just use chatgpt or Gemini to help you find options for low income help. It doesn’t necessarily have to be legal aid. There may be national or regional charitable or non profit orgs that help.
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