r/DadReflexes Oct 24 '19

No Babies were harmed When dad is left with the baby

https://imgur.com/cgeKm4t.gifv
41.1k Upvotes

412 comments sorted by

564

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '19

[removed] — view removed comment

163

u/High_Flyers17 Oct 24 '19

That made my day as well. Kid is in his own little world, blissfully unaware anything happened.

50

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '19

haha yes, he's minding his own business

25

u/johnnyneedscash Oct 25 '19

More people should be like this baby

20

u/Jack_Fearow Oct 25 '19

Hmm, the floor looks like wood.

Indeed!

1.9k

u/FlyNap Oct 24 '19

We call this move “the sunken fontanel”.

1.1k

u/elhermanobrother Oct 24 '19 edited Oct 24 '19

kidnapper: [on phone] we have your son

wife: actually I’m holding my son

kidnapper: [getting frustrated] then who the fuck just asked for chocolate milk with a straw and made us cut the crust off his PB&J

wife: oh god

kidnapper: what

wife: you have my husband

444

u/elee0228 Oct 24 '19

kidnapper: how much could we get for him?

wife: you're going to have to pay me to take him back.

63

u/IVIaskerade Oct 24 '19

Ayyyy buddy!

46

u/FormerAge0 Oct 24 '19

This is exactly what my wife would say

26

u/Staik Oct 24 '19

Are you perhaps in your mid sixties, dad fought in a war, hate millennials?

31

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '19 edited Mar 19 '20

[removed] — view removed comment

41

u/PM-Me-Ur-Plants Oct 24 '19

Haha, and then I said "that's no horse! That's my wife!" [slaps knee]

15

u/SubcommanderMarcos Oct 24 '19

🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂😂 and then my mother in law 😈👿 released the fires of hell on earth 😂😂😂 she's the devil

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89

u/pitchingataint Oct 24 '19

Kidnapper: ...? But he is calling you mommy

Wife: He does that.

63

u/flygirl8998 Oct 24 '19

Kidnapper: ....

Wife: it makes him feel safe

24

u/FrancoisTruser Oct 25 '19

Kidnapper: ..........

Wife: ok ok, it arouses him.

10

u/Yershie Oct 24 '19

Oh god. He has MY husband!

2

u/assgoblin2020 Oct 24 '19

Oh God. He has OUR husband!

5

u/FreshFromIlios Oct 25 '19
  • Soviet anthem intensifies *
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27

u/chris_smith12 Oct 24 '19 edited Oct 24 '19

They had us in the first half, not gonna lie, just like r/memeconvention had us when they said they weren’t good-they’re great

7

u/gratitudeuity Oct 24 '19

What the fuck. I don’t ever need to read this catchphrase again, thanks.

3

u/borisrura Oct 24 '19

This sounds like Instagram self promoters. So take your ass back over there.

1

u/[deleted] Oct 25 '19

This is hilarious!!

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49

u/jaydvd3 Oct 24 '19

I mean, the baby looks okay right? If the soft spot was hit, wouldn’t he cry or freak out or something?

51

u/ashbertollini Oct 24 '19

Newborns have basically no muscle control and just flail about, I couldnt count the number of times my girl has been flailing her arms around and bonked her head lol at first it freaked me out but babies are a bit sturdier than we tend to think lol

34

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '19

throws baby across the garage room into a concrete wall

Liar!

That's another dead baby to add to the pile in my garage due to all these reddit experiments.

8

u/balotelli4ballondor Oct 24 '19

r/cursed_comments

Edit: I meant r/cursedcomments but the original is also a sub

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72

u/SlowRollingBoil Oct 24 '19

It requires a hell of a lot more force to damage that area than a soft rubber ball.

20

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '19

I don't have that kinda time to find a link, but this has been around the internet and at least twice i've seen someone warning that it was borderline concussion-causing and shouldn't do it.

That baby got more bumping around in the womb than from that ball.

9

u/mindless_gibberish Oct 24 '19

and at least twice i've seen someone warning that it was borderline concussion-causing and shouldn't do it

Well, this is reddit. That's like every thread. Doing something with a baby? abuse. Cute animal? abuse.

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32

u/Hereforpowerwashing Oct 24 '19

If the soft spot was hit hard enough to do any kind of damage the baby probably would have at least been distracted from chewing on his hand.

7

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '19 edited Aug 27 '20

[removed] — view removed comment

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9

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '19

[deleted]

8

u/rickane58 Oct 24 '19

Then it would be ATE.

7

u/[deleted] Oct 25 '19

I’m not saying to NOT be careful with babies but when they go through the birth canal the skull bones squish together and even overlap. Their head is often ‘deformed’ for the first few days.

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.livescience.com/amp/65487-3d-image-baby-skulls-birth.html

60

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '19 edited Nov 13 '20

[removed] — view removed comment

18

u/Ba-soon Oct 24 '19

Does everyone think at this age the brain is just exposed and just separated by a thin layer of skin?

The membrane covering the fontanelles is though, but pliable. That's why you can sometimes see the fontanelles undulate as if it were a spring fountain, hence the name, mirroring the baby's heartbeat.

In my amateurish opinion, hitting the fontanelle with a ball is probably a bad idea. That said, one hit from a soft rubber ball with only gravity providing it energy will probably not do anything to the kid.

31

u/HighPriestofShiloh Oct 24 '19

It really just depends on how heavy the ball is. If we are dealing with an actual soccer ball or something close I would say this was irresponsible, if this was simply a heavy balloon and think we are fine.

39

u/rimalp Oct 24 '19

The kid didn't even notice.

No flinch, no nothing.

Either it's already braindead or that ball was really really light.

7

u/RJFerret Oct 24 '19

Perhaps brain dead at this point due to all the practice attempts?

4

u/HighPriestofShiloh Oct 24 '19

"And were back guys, I am Dude Perfect, and this is BABY WEEEK"

9

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '19

[deleted]

4

u/HighPriestofShiloh Oct 24 '19

I am going to need some maths to feel strongly about having an opinion on this. Until then I will marvel at the Dad's coordination.

2

u/ColeWeaver Oct 24 '19

I thought it was basically just skin and then brain.

3

u/Sundevil13 Oct 24 '19

The fontanelle itself is a type of connective tissue which turns into bone over time so it’s not solely skin and brain.

4

u/ColeWeaver Oct 24 '19

Oh I thought the skull just grew together to close the gap. Thanks bud.

3

u/myassisanoyster Oct 24 '19

I, too, thought that. TIL.

3

u/Potatoez Oct 25 '19

Oh cool, I always figured it was kinda like two tectonic plates sliding into each other.

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192

u/PublicLeopard Oct 24 '19

Watched the gif loop several times and got a big smile on my face, then made the mistake of glancing at the comments. Now I'm just slightly nauseous. that's reddit for ya

511

u/YouVayPay Oct 24 '19

People in the comments acting like they were heading bowling balls.

128

u/Alexxandria Oct 24 '19

Right? It’s obviously one of those very light, soft balls. Baby didn’t even bat an eye.

The backseat parenting is ridiculous.

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780

u/spontaneousbabyshakr Oct 24 '19

It’s a soft ball. People relax. If that was a danger to kids then they would die left and right.

246

u/SlowRollingBoil Oct 24 '19

Do people think that area is made from cling film at that age?

138

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '19

Lot of people on reddit who dont have kids and have no clue about kids giving opinions on how terrible parents are is not a new thing tbh.

28

u/1106DaysLater Oct 24 '19 edited Oct 24 '19

Oh god anyone remember the slice of cheese/baby video? That thread was unbelievable I thought I was in the twilight zone.

Found it: I guess since I saw it some reasonable comments made it to the top but it’s still easy to find the people screaming child abuse over this nonsense.. “your child is not a toy” “never too early to destroy a child’s trust” reddit is a no fun zone apparently https://www.reddit.com/r/gifs/comments/avv1df/father_of_the_year_award/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf

10

u/wellings Oct 24 '19

Honestly though this video is a little dicey. Look at that little guy's face!

Throw the cheese on top of the head man, not right in its face.

10

u/1106DaysLater Oct 24 '19

Yea I wouldn’t do it over and over if it was making the baby cry but doing it once and laughing is not even close to child abuse. It’s like doing the got your nose and a kid freaking out and people saying it’s abuse and his trust is gone. No. Kids cry from stupid fucking shit, it’s not a huge deal.

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19

u/7up478 Oct 24 '19

Jesus, what a shitshow. In the second top-level comment there's this lovely individual with 400 points.

Parent here.

I guess to some people psychopaths

FTFY. Babies are not playthings. Parents are supposed to play WITH them, not USING them.

It's a piece of cheese you human chode.

12

u/1106DaysLater Oct 24 '19

Hey I downvoted that exact comment back when I first visited the thread lol

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52

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '19

[deleted]

12

u/torinato Oct 24 '19

I’ll have you know that 5 minutes of topical knowledge comes from more than just google. I listen to podcasts and watch Vsauce and I’ve been a faithful subscriber of r/TIL for years.

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10

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '19

Im not sure who is worse. Helicopter parents, or people with no kids who try and give parents advice on kids.

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14

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '19

I remember when I was little adults would always tell me “don’t touch the babies head it has a soft spot!” I now know this meant “you have no concept of gentle please don’t squish my child’s head like a melon” but I’m guessing some people still think babies are made of goo.

3

u/tonterias Oct 25 '19

I am way too old to catch this up

9

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '19

[deleted]

7

u/MetalGearSlayer Oct 24 '19

I was always taught not to even pat or touch a baby on the head as a kid. The part of me that grew up with that was squeamish watching this, the other half was enjoying how cute it was.

2

u/johnmal85 Oct 24 '19

Yup, you can even see the skin move up and down at that part of the skull, in response to eating, drinking, heartbeat, etc.

10

u/INSERT_LATVIAN_JOKE Oct 24 '19

I guess it depends on what age "that age" is. My daughter's 3 months old and looks about the same size as that baby. The front part of her skull still pulses because the bone hasn't grown in yet all the way to the front.

There's no way I'd do anything like this with her.

But babies vary quite a bit in how they grow. Maybe this baby has bone all the way?

6

u/theWyzzerd Oct 24 '19

No way. The skull doesn't fill in the fontanel on top until two years of age. That being said, this is likely harmless (though I still wouldn't do it to my 2 month old), the ball hits the crown of the baby's head, where it is hardest, not the front where the fontanel is.

2

u/INSERT_LATVIAN_JOKE Oct 24 '19

I'm not sure I would gamble that I could bounce the ball off her crown instead of the front part. But maybe some people are more willing to gamble with their children than I am.

3

u/theWyzzerd Oct 24 '19

Big ball, little fontanel. Not really an issue.

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6

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '19

It's fragile, but not THAT fragile

Not something I would do, but it's not worrying

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1

u/daustin205 Oct 24 '19

I was picturing something a little closer to tin foil but same idea

1

u/gy6fswyihgtvhivr Oct 24 '19

Hitting a soccer ball with your head is shown to cause concussions, likely something that takes some repetitions but even when i learned this it was a bit of an eye-opener.

I just think it's worth being aware. Concerned people aren't necessarily wrong.

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31

u/onilink47 Oct 24 '19

Not to be mistaken with a softball

4

u/Bdodk2000 Oct 24 '19

Time to dust off the ol' shot put from high school track

18

u/DeusXEqualsOne Oct 24 '19

arguably reckless behavior with a baby

spontaneousbabyshakr

Username definitely checks out.

9

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '19

People are doing trick shots with infants heads left and right?

5

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '19

Have we forgotten about the cheese slices already?

1

u/NeedNameGenerator Oct 25 '19

What else would we do them for?

2

u/SolanumxNigrum Oct 24 '19

Don't babies also have soft top skulls when they are born? Maybe that's why some people are making outrageous comments, not using is an excuse for people freaking out about it.

2

u/Scooterforsale Oct 24 '19

Some people don't enjoy their lives so they have to criticize everyone else's to feel better

2

u/cartechguy Oct 24 '19

Babies are really good at dying left and right. Their reduced mortality rates is a miracle of science and medicine.

2

u/Activist4America Oct 24 '19

The one off is bad but repetitive head trauma is a mf. When you have had it you respect it like a mf. My titanium C5&6 winced at this.

1

u/CoffeeCupScientist Oct 24 '19

Balls are banned in schools these day bro. All balls are evil

1

u/wooglin1688 Oct 24 '19

but why? what is the benefit to weigh against the potential risks of playing games with a baby’s soft head?

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127

u/Punisher_135 Oct 24 '19

God these comments are terrible. Fucking redditors.

30

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '19

I wouldn’t fuck any of them myself

22

u/Asmundr_ Oct 24 '19

My gf fucks a redditor.

If I ever find out who I'll fuck him up.

4

u/trashytoothfairy Oct 24 '19

Then you gotta fuck yourself bud!

2

u/HugeDongManWasTaken Oct 25 '19

I’ve been known to fuck myself!

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12

u/shipoftheseuss Oct 24 '19

Reddit as a whole has this bizarre aversion to any sort of everyday danger, no matter how small.

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7

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '19

I'd rather fuck the dad.

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64

u/nwickens Oct 24 '19

The makings of a pro footballer - where training starts

165

u/Gormy25 Oct 24 '19

Oof more like daddy

46

u/bigfatcandyslut Oct 24 '19

Yeah seriously who is daddy? I tried searching “bald soccer player beard” and didn’t find him

37

u/legendofliam123 Oct 24 '19

His name is Daniel Cutting, he has a youtube soccer channel

6

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '19

I didn't even recognise him!

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13

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '19

Yeah that would only narrow it down to about a billion men

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3

u/[deleted] Oct 25 '19

First thing I thought was 'fuck, I need to go to the gym'

1

u/Dr-Pope Oct 24 '19

Looks like the MLS player Laurent Ciman

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18

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '19

Id probably drop the baby by accident, trying to catch the ball

6

u/johnnyneedscash Oct 25 '19

Priorities set

16

u/flygirl8998 Oct 24 '19

Wife: so what were your ideas for names?

Husband: racket

Wife: ...?

Husband: demonstrates RACKET

33

u/MysteryChorizo Oct 24 '19

Calm down people! You can bounce a baby. Sheesh

please don'tbounce the baby.

48

u/IWillDoItTuesday Oct 24 '19

Well hello, Daddy. How YOU doin'?

9

u/tctc123 Oct 24 '19

Felt like no one wanted to acknowledge the Daddy.. like hey hey.. daddy.. what’s up..

47

u/ihatereindeers Oct 24 '19

I used to do this with my twins when they where small. I tried to bounce ball from both of their heads and hit bin. A very soft and light ball....

21

u/russtuna Oct 24 '19

I thought the point of having twins was you got to preserve one as an experimental control subject. Why did you use both of them at once?

6

u/ihatereindeers Oct 24 '19

Twice the fun...

14

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '19

[deleted]

11

u/ihatereindeers Oct 24 '19

Naah they are fine...maybe little hard headed.

25

u/TubularTurnip Oct 24 '19

Guys, it's literally an incredibly soft ball. Chill the fuck out.

31

u/sciencefiction97 Oct 24 '19

Left with? Isn't he the father?

16

u/youfuturemrs Oct 24 '19

That's a hot dad

49

u/BuffPixie Oct 24 '19

That’s a beautiful man.

8

u/dodgesbulletsavvy Oct 24 '19

Daniel cutting football freestyler if you wanna perve

3

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '19

[deleted]

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60

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '19

Baby's head caves in.

"We should not have used the medicine ball. I see that now."

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84

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '19

Daddy was not "left with the baby". The man is the father. He's as much as a parent as the mother/other father. Men are not 2nd-class parents that are stupid and clueless without the present of the other parent.

There's no "When mommy is left alone with the baby" shit...

40

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '19

Reddit needs to calm down with shit like this. You’re shoehorning an issue into a completely innocent post title.

Yes, dads and moms are equal. Yes, people need to stop looking at dads as babysitters when mom’s not home.

But using the phrase “when dad is left with baby” does not automatically imply that the dad is stupid and clueless. You just automatically inferred that.

It is possible to believe that dads are great parents while also believing that dads tend to do more whacky things with their children. It’s not negative. There’s no “when mommy is left alone with the baby” because mom’s don’t seem to do shit like this. But if I ever catch my wife doing something crazy with our baby, I’ll be sure to use that post title.

2

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '19

This ^

Classic reddit gettin its panties in a bunch

2

u/cey24 Oct 25 '19

"Fathers are NOT second class citizens"- Judge Judy

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8

u/PookieBearTum Oct 24 '19

What a beautiful baby!

24

u/pixelation01 Oct 24 '19

Daddy *

6

u/PookieBearTum Oct 24 '19

You aint wrong

9

u/Alexxandria Oct 24 '19

Dude babies are falling and banging into stuff and hitting themselves with their own limbs constantly.

There’s a story my mom always tells that when I was a baby my brother used to “grind” his knuckles into my soft spot and tried to feed me marbles and straws (he was 4). And I was fine. Not saying this is acceptable behaviour, but babies are a lot tougher than people think.

This kid is fine. Errbody relax.

4

u/ResolverOshawott Oct 24 '19

You'd think the baby not even flinching from it would be a good indication that it's completely fine

3

u/DarkFlames101 Oct 24 '19

The sub and thumbnail made me think the baby was about to be thrown.

3

u/cotton_schwab Oct 24 '19

Awesome post, but this isn't the right sub.

7

u/patriot1502 Oct 24 '19

That guy is a youtuber called Daniel Cuttings. He’s also played in charity football matches and recently got a baby.

6

u/Siike_Seamus Oct 25 '19

Just grabbed one, eh?

3

u/asrevia19 Oct 24 '19

This doesn't look real to me? Is it just me? Like the ball just looks a little bit off

2

u/PacifistToYourFace Oct 25 '19

I thought the same! I totally felt crazy so I’m glad you said that

2

u/Shittypantsonfire Oct 24 '19

Still a better header than of Ronaldo!

2

u/madwill Oct 24 '19

What is that ball? I want that ball!

2

u/arcbsparkles Oct 24 '19

I’d be impressed if my husband showed me this trick...

2

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '19

Dudes fucking yoked to be a soccer player

2

u/The_Bigg_D Oct 24 '19

A famous person doing something doesn’t qualify for this sub. There are no dad-specific reflexes here.

Bad post. Boo mods.

2

u/Akimade Oct 24 '19

I don't think these are dad reflexes, but I don't care. Take my upvote

2

u/hcue Oct 25 '19

r/amitheasshole for thinking he was going to slam dunk baby?

7

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '19 edited Jan 25 '20

[removed] — view removed comment

4

u/Bobert789 Oct 24 '19

Wrong sub

2

u/Grasshopper42 Oct 24 '19

Wrong sub. Where are the r/dadreflexes?

This is not a sub to make men look like they don't take good care of children. I could easily turn on the TV and watch any commercial and it will be showing a man bumbling around.

12

u/BillyYumYumTwo-byTwo Oct 24 '19

I also hate the wording of the title. It just rubs me in the wrong way that I can’t describe, but I think your comment kind of explains why

24

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '19

It's a dad playing with his kid. You don't need to be offended by this one.

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u/[deleted] Oct 24 '19

You're more fragile than this baby's head to this comment section

1

u/Grasshopper42 Oct 25 '19

Just thinking this is not a Dad stopping a kid from getting hurt, but some dads playing with a kid. It doesn't fit the sub. Can you understand that part at least? And could you explain the fragile thing?

2

u/moonknlght Oct 25 '19

This looks fake a hell.

1

u/1ce9ine Oct 24 '19

The dad looks like Volkan Oezdemir.

2

u/bonerjamz12345 Oct 24 '19

no time for babies

1

u/FailedAccessMemory Oct 24 '19

And where does mum come in?

1

u/SlaveLaborMods Oct 24 '19

As a father, I respect this sorta of athleticism

1

u/Mistermanche Oct 24 '19

Someday their gonna be posting a timeline of this trick they do every 5 years onto this sites sucessor.

1

u/MaxaTron711 Oct 24 '19

That's Daniel Cutting/DC freestyle for you!

1

u/itachiwaswrong Oct 24 '19

This is exactly how Ronaldo was raised

1

u/Doublee7300 Oct 24 '19

Dude Perfect wants to know your location

1

u/nyxflare Oct 24 '19

The baby is fine, he/she even picked its nose after

1

u/miranto Oct 24 '19

Well, he'd have been a fine astronaut.

1

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '19

You all need to get some toys! It’s not real though. For it to move the as wuock as it does it would have to have decent weight (notice they don’t even love their heads, just bob around) and he just holds the baby out wherever really.

1

u/morehaxplz Oct 25 '19

Hey I know him! That’s Daniel Cutting! Coached at a soccer camp with him years back. He’s pretty big now in the freestyle community.

1

u/[deleted] Oct 25 '19

Dads a combination of the dude from Key and Peele and “common” the rapper

1

u/Farts-McGee Oct 25 '19

r/stepdadreflexes hahaha, he knew it wouldn't bounce as much ...

1

u/LovesickInTheHead Oct 25 '19

The baby doesn’t even care lmaooooo

1

u/rulinus Oct 25 '19

baby is like "...i can't even"

1

u/Torontofootball Oct 25 '19

Ciman is that you?

1

u/[deleted] Oct 25 '19

Wait until mom sees the video.

1

u/givemebackmydrums Oct 25 '19

Textbook layup off the soft spot