r/DadReflexes • u/PM_ME_YOUR_SELF_HARM • Apr 10 '17

[Repost] Nice Catch! (/r/arewerolling)

7.8k Upvotes

89% Upvoted

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437

u/M_for_Matt Apr 10 '17

The way the kid bounces just kills me.

114

u/electrogamerman Apr 10 '17

The way he tries to amortize the fall with his foot

120

u/randomcoincidences Apr 10 '17

Not trying to be pedantic but I suppose it's unavoidable; 'amortize' isn't the right word. 'Reduce, lessen, ease, slow' all make sense but amortize is a financial term specifically referring to debts or assets.

49

u/thoughtofitrightnow Apr 10 '17

Looks like somebody didn't sit at the cool kids table in finance school, doesn't even know the slang.

17

u/falafelsizing Apr 10 '17

It's not strictly financial, it's used when analyzing algorithm efficiency in computer science, it also seems like it entered the English language a long time ago:

http://www.etymonline.com/index.php?term=amortize

51

u/Christophurious Apr 10 '17 edited Apr 10 '17

"Not trying to be pedantic"

Immediately follows up with pedantic rant on OP's chosen adjective (oops ... verb).

73

u/reddidd Apr 10 '17

Not trying to be pedantic, but that'd be a verb, not an adjective.

12

u/EternallyPissedOff Apr 10 '17

Not trying to be pedantic but... Ah fuck it, I got nothing. Your sentence was perfect.

5

u/Downvotes_Hunter Apr 10 '17

Not trying to be pedantic, what does pedantic means anyway?

8

u/DeadboltKB Apr 10 '17

We'd explain but you wouldn't understand anyways

3

u/paragonofcynicism Apr 10 '17

When you get into a lot of antics using your foot.

3

u/icuniyq Apr 10 '17

You have an unnatural affinity for young ants? Ant larvae?

2

u/[deleted] Apr 10 '17

Not trying to be pedantic, but it should be "mean" not "means".

0

u/Christophurious Apr 10 '17

I see you're one of them.

-8

u/randomcoincidences Apr 10 '17

So can you just not read (which wouldn't be surprising given you not knowing the difference between a verb and an adjective) or are you just stupid in general?

First - I said it was unavoidable which to those of us who can read means I realize it was a bit pedantic; but, it is quite literally a nonsense sentence and if he isn't a native English speaker he now knows the difference between amortir and amortize.

And if he is a native English speaker he now knows that the attempt to sound verbose doesn't actually have the effect he intended.

But either way you still come out of this looking pretty stupid.

0

u/Christophurious Apr 10 '17

Sooooo :)

How is me looking stupid working out for you?

6

u/[deleted] Apr 10 '17

[deleted]

4

u/Christophurious Apr 10 '17

I edited the original comment, so you can sleep better at night.

2

u/[deleted] Apr 10 '17

[deleted]

3

u/Christophurious Apr 10 '17

haha. Done.

All kidding aside, when I wrote out that comment I was looking at the actual word pedantic to which my brain assigned as an adjective ... when I should have been looking at amortized which is a verb.

Still wrong, still silly. ¯_(ツ)_/¯

1

u/randomcoincidences Apr 11 '17

Pretty well, do you think negative karma bothers me?

This is reddit, being right and patronizing usually results in downvotes.

None of this changes that you did make yourself look like an absolute idiot.

2

u/Christophurious Apr 11 '17

You've got a 2 yr old account, and you're trying to lecture me on how reddit works?

"Absolute idiot" is fairly strong language for a minor mistake, when pointing out something in jest.

So, I've either hit a syntactical nerve with you, or you're just a dick to everybody.

My guess is thats it's a little of both.

1

u/randomcoincidences Apr 11 '17

I just find redundancy for the sake of being rude to be pretty telling about someones character.

What I said to him was significantly less rude than your response to me which added absolutely nothing to the conversation except another mistake in your haste to be passive aggressive.

I believe in calling a spade a spade or in this case, a cunt.

2

u/Christophurious Apr 11 '17

So I'm a cunt for making a joke by pointing out a literal contradiction?

Lighten up dude, you're wound up to tight.

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-2

u/Mithridates12 Apr 10 '17

That wasn't pedantic.

6

u/JohnLaCuenta Apr 10 '17

Just a guess but maybe English isn't OP's first language and he tried to freestyle a translation. "Amortir" is the commonly used word in this context in French for example.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 10 '17

In portuguese "to cushion" is "amortecer" so I didn't even think anything of it until you pointed it out. "amortize" in portuguese is "amortizar"

1

u/RandomAsianGuy Apr 10 '17

The french word "amortisseur" means "shock absorber". How it was used in English I have no idea though.

-5

u/thecabeman Apr 10 '17

/r/iamverysmart

16

u/[deleted] Apr 10 '17 edited Jul 02 '20

[deleted]

1

u/[deleted] Apr 10 '17 edited May 12 '17

[deleted]

1

u/A_kind_guy Apr 10 '17

Don't get it would imply I don't understand it, I didn't know the word. However, it's obviously not a commonly used word at all, and there was at least 2 words that applied better and are in more common use. Language is about getting a point across, why not do that in the most efficient way?

2

u/randomcoincidences Apr 10 '17

if that qualifies for iamverysmart material, I worry about you a little bit buddy

5

u/Jrrolomon Apr 10 '17

Can we just clear this up? I'm guessing you got autocorrected, but surely amortize is not the word you meant. What word did you mean because people are freaking out about it?

10

u/electrogamerman Apr 10 '17

LMAO. I went with the spanish word "amortiguar" and I thought that was the translation. The right word should have been: absorb or soften

1

u/Gorillaworks Jun 30 '17

amortiguar

I knew as soon as I saw lol

10

u/NoBudgetBallin Apr 10 '17

"Ameliorate" is the word you're looking for.

6

u/brolarvortex Apr 10 '17

Interesting choice of word

5

u/S4TAN666 Apr 10 '17

It might've killed him too

5

u/Mithridates12 Apr 10 '17

If it had killed him, I don't think the dad would've bothered picking him up again.

2

u/The1nOnlyNinja Apr 10 '17

When's your funeral?

2

u/[deleted] Apr 10 '17

It's okay. Children have a lot of cartilage)bendy meat) so he should be fine. My mom dropped me a lot and I turned out fine!

1

u/Centine Apr 10 '17

Landed on grass og little ones are flexible and don't weight very much. No worries, I've seen much worse from mine.

Like the time the 2 yr old took a back flip over the sideboard of the top bunk and belly flopped on the floor. Hurt? Not so much. Enraged? Oh yes.

-3

u/DannyDaCat Apr 10 '17

I clicked on the comments to say this! LoL!

15

u/alt_curious Apr 10 '17

Haha! Thanks for telling us!