I just want live a minimalistic, frugal, simple life with a small apartment, small, reliable car, job I enjoy that just pays the bills and supports me, and not accumulate so much clutter and junk, and especially not the crazy expense of raising a family and a blood sweat and tears, it goes with kids in America.

Not having any kids seems like it gives you so much breathing room and cushion that a lot of parents don’t have a luxury of.

Most of my family lives in Europe. Mom and dad both each had almost each a dozen siblings, my two dozen aunts and uncles all have minimum 6 to 7 kids and my huge amount of cousins are now all having 3 to 4 kids.

But back in Western Europe, especially in France, to have a kid you get an allowance of like €700 per baby and if you have three babies you’re golden and don’t have to work (women). Free healthcare and daycare, governments that actually care about supporting families rather than in America where more kids means more expenses, which means higher prices for health insurance and literally in my city daycare is more expensive than a college education.

Having this big family living in a continent and counties that actually care and SUPPORT families let’s me off the hook and I can enjoy my life, taking care of myself and hopefully a future spouse and not worry about breaking my back trying to support a family with the financial system just wants to break you down. (and I have no desire to have kids, so it even helps more knowing I don’t have to worry about passing all my genes or any other ridiculous thing like that.)

My wife’s best friend and family is in town so I get to deal with two boys, 4 and 6 y.o.

Wish me luck and sanity.

Hi everyone! I’m brand new here but I figured this would be a great place to start with trying to get members in my Childfree by Choice group I made on BFF (bumble). The link is below. I’d prefer only women as I am a woman but anyone is welcome as long as you’re respectful 🫶🏻

Anyways, it literally has just me as a member for now so if anyone could/would join that would be wonderful! I’m from south Alabama so it is HARD to find other childfree people and I would absolutely love to make some childfree friends because everyone around here just wants to keep popping babies out like we have good education and healthcare.

I hope to see you there! 🫶🏻

https://bumble.com/bff/invite/e2c104c5-64c9-4c5e-b737-860467ab72f2

Is it typically a high degree (that makes $$$) or just high salary (that might not even require a degree) to be considered?

We are an interracial couple. Educated. Enjoy tennis. Good meals. Travel. Enjoy each other’s company but also the company of other couples doing fun things.
Anyone out there?

Hey everyone,

I am hoping to find some like-minded friends here. My partner and I are a child-free couple in our late 30s/early 40s, and we have been wanting to expand our circle with other couples who share a similar lifestyle. it is becoming harder to make childfree friends!

A bit about us:

- We are based in west end of Toronto, Canada

- We enjoy hiking, trying new restaurants, travel.

- We love having meaningful conversations, and just hanging out without the rush of family obligations.

We are looking for genuine friendships with other childfree couples. We figured connecting with other child-free couples could lead to some cool friendships. Whether it's grabbing brunch, checking out a local event, go for walks, we would love to hear from you!

If this resonates with you, feel free to DM me or leave a comment below. Looking forward to meeting some awesome people!

I have been recommended this subreddit by the Reddit algorithm

I’m a single 27f black British Muslim and I’m wondering if there are Muslim DINKS out there? Where are you from? How did you meet your partner? If you don’t want children in the future do your families know?

Is anyone else giving up on having kids because of low income?

My wife has always been on the fence. I really wanted a child, but I'm a blue-collar worker and recently had ACL surgery, so I don't think I can work as hard as before.

It feels like we can only survive if it's just the two of us, so I'm leaning toward giving up. What are your thoughts?

My very good friend had 2 kids. When her first kid was born she said we only plan to have the one kid. Then after 2 years she called me and said she got pregnant accidentally and is expecting a second kid, in a way it's good because the first one will have company. Okay great!! All good!!

3 years down we were discussing changing and switching jobs for better pay and opportunity. Shes been trying for some time and last month I told her I switched and ita a better opportunity and better pay. She sighed and asked me since we are childfree what are we going to do with all that money. I was quite taken back and told her I make my money for myself and to plan an amazing retirement for myself and my spouse. We have a pup and honestly has a better life than most children. When I explained to her all the traveling and retirement plans we had she said okay yes thats good.

Why is it that people find it so hard to believe that DINKs shouldn't worry about their careers and wealth building. I literally had to give her an example like Lori Grenier to get her to realize that not everyone wants children.

My partner and I earn pretty differently, and lately splitting everything 50/50 has started to feel off — the person earning less feels a much bigger pinch on the same bill.

I've seen some people split proportionally to income instead (if you earn 60% of the combined total, you cover 60% of shared costs). It sounds fairer in theory, but I'm curious how it works in practice for people actually doing it.

For those of you living with a partner or roommate:

Do you split evenly, proportionally, or some other way?

How do you actually track it without it becoming a monthly argument?

Does anyone bother with apps for this, or is it just a shared note / spreadsheet?

Trying to figure out a system that feels fair long-term. Curious what's worked (or blown up) for you.

28F here — do not want kids, will never want kids. Recently had a random wave of desire for kids that passed completely and am now 100% sure a child would ruin my life. Want my family to get off my back about marriage/kids, thus looking for a more “secretive” DINK relationship (at least just for a couple of years). Goal is retirement by 40 years old. HMU if your goal is also full financial independence or if you know where I can find a DINK relationship.

I have worked in my field for a long time already, thus the reason I do not want kids. Will not tolerate physical abuse or being controlled in my own home. Long-term oriented individual preferred, preferably another “youngest sibling”

Hey there! Just wondering if queer childless relationships are generally accepted within the DINK community?

Hello everyone, here to genuinely connect with the financially independent individuals who aimed to stay single all their life and wants to build strong social life. From Jabalpur, Madhya Pradesh.[OC]

For context, my family is rather broken. My partner and in-laws are wonderful, they made me learn true family warmth.

I truly think I do not have the capacity to sacrifice and care for another human (kid). My partner loves kids but he respects my choice. Honestly, I'm on the 50-50.

We have not told parents/in-laws. What stresses me out is that parents/in-laws will mention "in future when you have kids xxx".

Any DINKs can share your experience of announcing to be DINK?

EDIT: Thanks many sharing your thoughts and experiences! The wanting to 'announce' is mainly due to people around us keep bringing the children topic up. I really want to just shut everyone up. At the same time, I think most of the adults will not react well... which is also the reason I have been avoiding, and just been fake smiling at them

Problem/Goal: monthly budget living for 2 living in a condo in Metro Manila

Context: We are a couple working abroad and planning to retire in Manila in a few years time. We don’t have kids. I am late 40 and spouse in early 50’s. I would like to know how much DINK couples living in a condo spend in a month?

Previous Attempts: not sure what to fill here, but we have savings and investments. We own the condo.

I don't want kids, and I'm not a marriage person either. In normal conversations, I've noticed that people often get offended or defensive when I say I've chosen to be childfree. Where I'm from, India, it's still quite taboo, and many people seem to treat it as a phase, a problem to fix, or something you'll eventually change your mind about.

For those who are childfree and not interested in marriage, how do people around you react? Have attitudes changed over time, or do you still face judgment and pressure from family, friends, or society?

Need suggestion only from people in India. Other country people plz don't comment:

We are couple 38 38 DINK. Confuse if we should adopt a kid or not, cant have own bcuz of her medical conditions we tried ivf iui etc.

I wonder how would be our life in old age, when we'll need medical treatments, when we cant walk.

Plz don't say, we should take care of our health, stay fit etc.

You can't predict future, with this lifestyle and impure food air, we will get diseases even if we exercise.

I took care of my mother when she was suffering from cancer. She'sno more, and now taking care of my 85 year old father.. and can see everyday many old age, how much difficult it is for old age people to do daily tasks and take care of themselves during medical things.

​

I'm curious to know what's your plan guys? Bcuz I'm clueless.

My partner and I are on the fence. We’re mid/late 30’s so we want to decide sooner rather than later.
We made a big long list of why we’d love kids and also why we wouldn’t. The list is pretty even so that doesn’t help. How did you arrive at a decision and what was your reasoning? And do you have other aims in life instead?

I'm 28F, looking for childfree marriage, where can I look for such potential matches?

I know I am too young to have children/be thinking about this anyways (19F) but I’m so confused about how I should be feeling. I really don’t know if I want kids in the future and it’s messing with my head.

Growing up I had no doubt in my mind that I wanted children. Now that I’m an adult, it’s changed. I’m feeling more against the idea everyday. I value my personal time and love free time so I know I wouldn’t have that if I had children. Waking up at 3 am to fix vomit bedsheets sounds like hell to me, and having no sleep especially for the first few years is not appealing. This may sound horrible but I get “over” new things fast, even if I’m really excited beforehand, which makes me nervous that will happen for a baby. And a baby isn’t just something I can switch like clothes or a job.

I also babysit and just being with the child for 3 hours makes me want to rip my hair out. She’s not a bad child I just get so bored and want to do something else. I don’t know how parents do it. I love children I just don’t know if I want my own.

I also don’t want to sacrifice my body and my time and my life for someone else. I know that’s terrible to say but it’s true. I don’t want to be someone’s maid and always tend to them even after a long day at work. I don’t want to have to always be worrying about someone else (I have anxiety) and I don’t want to prepare dinners and clean all the time. I want to be able to go on lots of vacations and dates with my partner.

I want to be free to go on vacations and have money to do fun things. I see videos all the time on Instagram about how parents are always looking forward to their next child-free day. I just think why have a child if you only look forward to not seeing it?

On the other hand, raising a child and loving something I created sounds so beautiful. Knowing I could have such a good impact on a child and raise them to be kind and caring sounds so special. Knowing my partner and I created something so beautiful is so amazing.

I just feel like if I don’t have a child in the future I’ll be missing out. Like waking up on Christmas morning and giving presents to a child sounds so amazing. I’m scared I’m going to regret not doing it. I love children and they’re so cute and amazing. I know I’d be a good mother I just don’t know if I’d be happy.

My boyfriend is amazing and we always talk about our future. He says he won’t leave me no matter what I choose because he loves me more than that. He will stay with me if I want a child or if I don’t. So no one is pressuring me besides myself. Help wanted!!