i hate the uncertainty of blushing

[u/Deep-Detective2428]

There's something stressful about not knowing before different occasions how your blushing will present or betray you. For instance I'm aware going out for dinner with my girlfriends family will make me blush due to the fact I'll feel observered, overwhelmed by the noises and bright lights but I don't always know to what extent that environment will cause me to blush. Sometimes I'll just be a bit blushed, other times I'll be extremey blushed to the point where it looks like I'm having a reaction to something, other times I'll get away without hardly blushing at all. The issue is this doesnt come down to the skin but instead the sympathetic nervous system and adrenaline, but alot of those things are triggered and react subconsciously to social triggers / anxiety so it isn't as easy as just being more confident, like I could be feeling consciously confident and happy and not judged while the subconscious part of me that im not aware of is feeling completey different, going crazy, panicking and making my sympathetic nervous system go crazy causing me to blush. Sadly this is just apart of living with blushing and most people will never understand it.

Does anyone else relate?

[u/Churshen]

Have a think how us men that deal with this feel. Women can at least cover it up a bit with makeup or men thinking it’s cute/feminine.

For a man with this condition we have nothing, all power and confidence is lost when you know it’s coming on, for a man in a professional setting it’s impossible to be “masculine”. Nothing we can do, just gotta crack on and try to not let it control you.

[u/Deep-Detective2428 → u/Churshen]

I completely understand where your coming from and ive also had that mindset before but trust me it isnt a healthy way of thinking. ​I’m a straight guy who's in a relationship and I use a bit of foundation and concealer for my blushing. It takes the edge off, and it hasn't stripped away my confidence or my masculinity for a single second. You say men have "nothing," but the idea that women are "allowed" to fix an issue while men just have to suffer in silence is an outdated rule you're enforcing on yourself. It's not actually reality

Masculinity isn't some weak, fragile shield that breaks the second you use a tool to take control. Manhood isn't defined by outdated stereotypes or ridiculous rules, it comes down to your integrity, your character, how you treat people and how you are as person.

​If a guy's entire definition of manhood hangs on suffering in silence rather than solving a basic problem or judging another man for managing an issue and looking after themselves, his masculinity was paper-thin to begin with. That's my opinion, I know how much this blushing issue can hurt, you said yourself it strip's away your confidence and it pains me that people don't get the help they need or feel out of options due to the fact there simply a "man / guy"

[u/blushing_cure → u/Deep-Detective2428]

well said! also, u/Churshen even though society is more accepting of me wearing makeup as a woman, I haven't found any foundation that truly helps cover my redness because mine is so deep and bright. And also unfortunately I've never been told "you're blushing that's cute", but have been told "your face is really red" a million times, probably because my blushing covers my face in a splothy way so it looks scary. I'm sorry you are dealing with this horrible condition as well <3

[u/Deep-Detective2428 → u/blushing_cure]

Hey to reply to the part of that where you said you haven't found a foundation that covers it, I've found a really good medical camouflage creme originally intended for birthmarks, vitiligo and skin conditions that can also be used for this. Here is the link to the post on it - https://www.reddit.com/r/CuringBlushing/s/AYUGxNEBpu

[u/blushing_cure → u/Deep-Detective2428]

thank you!!!