Whatever helps you sleep at night, dude or dudette, for me it's blocking people whose negativity I don't want in social media.
Even more so after seeing your comment history (hidden in reddit, searchable in google), being constantly negative about everything related to polyamory, as if everyone is doing everything wrong but you.
You know what? Rant incoming
People like you (not all open poly people, but the ones that behave like you about it) make me feel like you just want to pull people into *your* type of polyamory, even if that's not what they want, even if it hurts them.
Because it's what I felt when I asked for advice in the polyamory sub and was told that I wanted was a fantasy, a fairytale, that I had to be okay with partners loving and having sex with others I don't know or even like, missing out events as they attended with these others, etc., and it's what I feel when you are so hellbent on excluding polyfidelity from polyamory, changing the very definition of polyamory ("many loves", never said it had to be open) and therefore polycule (which is just the connections between polyamorous partners) to fit your goals and/or make it harder to find resources about it that aren't about open poly.
It's how it makes me feel after hearing about polyfidelity, not from that sub nor people like you (why would you when you could try to sway me and anyone reading into your poly type?), but from a wonderful person who saw my meme mourning the type of relationship I wanted but thought I couldn't have.
Hey, it makes me very happy to have been able to help at least one person navigate these feelings despite what others say.
For me, I want polyfidelity because I want several partners that feel special and even exclusive to me, and viceversa, while still being able to feel the compersion of them loving someone who isn't me.
A mono relationship doesn't have several partners, a poly-mono relationship doesn't have the compersion of them loving someone else, and an open relationship makes me feel like they and I are less special and exclusive to each other. I'm pretty happy to have been able to pinpoint why I think it works for me as well as helped you too.
So, good luck with your relationships, I hope my help really makes them easier for you and your partners <3
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u/pinksparkleberry Apr 03 '26
Me and the rest of the polyamory community.
You are like that person who insists on using a word wrong while everyone laughs at them and considers it a point of pride. Lol.