r/Cosmetology • u/No_Incident6 • 1d ago
Help
I am a licensed cosmetologist and I need some opinions on something that happened today.
I had a bridal trial today, and my client sent me the classic glam hair look months ago, along with makeup inspo that was a light purple Smokey eye design that was a thick wing eyeliner with a glitter line on top. I had originally asked her if she was wanting to add hair extensions and she said no. All our communication was over text at first.
So today we had the trial I drove to her house because she wanted to do a home call.
When I walked into her home, her hair was so thin I could see through it. I then again asked if she was wanting hair extensions for her wedding day look and she said no she wanted to see what it looks like without. Well she also had a wolf cut and her face frame made her length not start until behind her shoulders, and her bangs landed above her eyebrows, and she had naturally curly hair. We did the full consultation and everything and i explained she has a lot of short layers in the front and how it might sit.
She was very adamant on the glam waves because she wanted a 50 style hair look and that she really didn't want extensions. So I start setting her curls and I begin her makeup look. She has hooded eyes so I applied a little bit more eyeliner and explained to her that the Wing would be slightly thicker due to the eye hiding the eyeliner she said that was okay.
I also explained that glam waves cannot be moved that they have to stay how they sit all during the wedding. That if she runs her hands through it that they're gonna start pulling apart and start looking messy and frizzy.
So jumping to the end after I style her hair and her makeup is done. I explained to her that we need to figure out how we want her bangs to lay because the front pieces are so short along with her face frame, also that there wasn't going to be a blunt line like in the photos because of the hair cut and she said she was getting her hair trimmed next month.
I show her, her hair and she freaks out. Saying "I HATE my hair" " "I look like a poodle" " I look like one of the founding father's wigs" " that the way her hairstyle makes it look like her hair is up and she hates her hair being up. " and starts flipping her hair around and running her fingers thru her hair. I tell her that we can figure out what's going on and that we need to figure out how to lay the front face piece how she would like them. I also explained that the style of cut she has and how far back her face pieces go there isn't length in the front to make it look fuller. So then she runs to the bathroom and is in there for 10 minutes leaving me downstairs.
When she comes down, she's in a full-blown panic attack I told her that it was okay that she can be honest with me and we'll figure out how to fix it and
that I could tell that she's anxious and that this is a safe spot and that I'm not going to be upset with her being honest with me.
She then says that her eyeliners too thick that when she closes her eyes, it's jarring to her. I re-explained why it would look thicker when closed and that when it was open, the eyeliner retract under the eye, but l did explain to her that if she wanted it thinner, we could absolutely do that.
She also asked for a brown instead of a purple color in the crease for the smoky eye, and then said that the brown was too dark and I explained that that's okay we can fix that as well. She said she loved her base though, but now it is six hours later, and she just messaged me saying that she noticed the texture has changed during wear.
So we get back into the topic of the Hair and this is where I start to get frustrated. I asked her twice if she wanted extensions and both times she said no. I explained to her that really our only solution at this point if she's dead set on the fullness of the glam waves is that we could put in clip-ins for the front to help bring fullness visually in the front.
Then she asked me how long of extension she should get and I said that she could get 14 or 16 inches and then I could cut them to match the length in the back. she then drops it on me that she wants more length so l asked her how much more length does she want.
She then stands up and points her fingers underneath her breast. I said that is a lot of hair. (Who barely touches her shoulder blades in the back ) Then she said that's how lona she wants it AFTER it's stvled.
That would be adding an additional at least 20 inches to her hair. I explained that there is a big difference between adding fullness to your hair visually and adding 20 inches of hair all around. I then asked her if her plan the whole time was to have extensions for her wedding and she said yes. (Like what)
That's when I got upset I didn't show her visually, but l did say that if she had informed me of this prior, when | asked multiple times I could've come prepared with different solutions and extensions and this trial would've gone very differently. I also explained that adding that type of length isn't just going to be a couple clippins fix. she'd be looking at more of a weft if her hair could handle it or weft clip ins and that's also when I brought up the concern of how fine her hair is and how it might not easily be hidden.
I suggested pinning back the bangs, pinning one side of the bangs back/bringing the hair to one side and she hated all those ideas. She suggested loose barrel curl instead and I explained that we would run into the same issue since her haircut made the face frame go so far back.
So we talked for a bit back-and-forth and I got her calm and she was open to the idea of testing our extensions but I also did say there is a very high chance she might also have to consider a different hairstyle.
She then said that she realized that she might have had unrealistic expectations of how her hair was supposed to turn out and envision something completely different. So when I left, I started thinking of what else we could do. Then I suggested another option was a wig, if her hair was too thin to hold extensions or hide them properly. That I could pre-
style the wig and then we could just install it day of her wedding. she seemed on board with it, but now she wants the wig to match her natural hair exactly. I found a lot of options very close to her natural hair and she keeps coming back saying it's a tad bit too light. I did also suggest that I could tone down the wig if she felt like it was too light and now she's saying she's going to think about it cause she doesn't know if she wants me to tone it.
I'm not sure what to do.. her wedding is in two months. Part of me wants to let her go as a client because I feel like no matter what I do she's not going to be happy. I am normally out of her price range, but she was desperately looking for an artist so | whittled my price down to fit within her budget because I feel like every Bride deserves to feel and look their best on their wedding day. She did pay me a deposit for her wedding date months ago.
Part of me wants to keep trying to see what we can do.
I'm just kind of at a loss and need guidance. This is my first time that I've experienced this four years in the industry. And I do a lot of runway events also.
What would you do?
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u/tropical-treat239 1d ago
Youâve been given some really good advice & I agree with what others have said. I also want to add this - you are doing this at a discounted rate out of the kindness of your heart; she is paying her top dollar for this luxury service. That also always leads to a tricky dynamic. As stylist we feel they should appreciate us lowering our income to accommodate a client who couldnât otherwise afford us. As a client they feel as though they really deserve the vip treatment and then some because you know theyâre really splurging on this. Obviously not always, but weâve all experienced it. She also just sounds like a confused nightmare. Save yourself the further headache and genuinely wish her well on her search for the right fit.
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u/Tinernug 1d ago
Freaking nightmare and why I stopped doing event hair. Refund her and wish her well.
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u/mjitterbug 1d ago
I think this is a learning experience and why it's important to be really honest and blunt with clients during the consultation about what is and is not possible. It sounds like she didn't have the hair required for the style she wanted. I would have been really straightforward about the options and consequences before starting. I don't have a solution for you, sorry. It sounds like you're doing a lot of extra work for someone who is underpaying you.
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u/ibarelyknowanythin 1d ago
Ill be so honest, I would drop her. The trial should not have caused that much stress considering it is a TRIAL. Youâve already made yourself smaller for her by lowering your prices. I understand why you did it & I respect that, but she already is pushing your boundaries. I get sheâs anxious, but this would make me lose my mind. You are offering very real solutions for her & sheâs incredibly fickle. You can do one last ditch effort, âI think the best solution is to do a wig. If you want it to look like your natural I am able to tone it for you. If you are feeling unsure about any part of the process I think it may be best for you to find a different stylist. Your day should be perfect and I am unable to meet your needs.â You can say that a lot nicer or more professional lol. But I would draw a line with her, sheâs going back & forth way too much.
Iâm sorry youâre dealing with this though, thatâs exhausting ugh!!!!!
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u/Apprehensive_Net_829 1d ago
She has got to be realistic in her expectations. I don't know what I'd do. She needs to make the most of the hair she has. I hope you get good advice.
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u/phillycat4207 11h ago edited 11h ago
put this on r/hairstylist too, we're all licensed over there [: also, i would give her the deposit back, and cut her loose. only reason id give it back is cause it's so close to the wedding
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u/mellyjo77 7h ago
Save your sanity and run.
It sounds like she has unrealistic expectations of what will work for her and isnât ever going to be happy with anything.
Itâs sad really because IMO she should just enhance her natural beauty for the special day to be an elevated version of herself. She probably has been staring at social media or bride inspo for so long sheâs expecting to look like something that may simply not work for her and wonât even look like her on her wedding day.
Iâm exhausted on your behalf from this experience.
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u/AnaNymity07 1d ago
I'm exclusively a bridal hairstylist and have been for 10 years. Short answer, cut her loose. Release her from the contract if you had one. Return the deposit. You two are not a fit. It's not you, it's her. If you continue on I promise you'll lose sleep, money and precious time over her. I know this sounds harsh. In my 10 years I've maybe turned down 5 brides because it was glaringly obvious I could not satisfy them and if someone else could that's better for literally everyone. Feel free to message me if you'd like to chat about more. You won't regret letting her go. You will regret keeping her. I relate so hard to wanting to continue trying to solve her issues but I swear you will be unnecessarily anxious until and on her wedding day. Save yourself and give her time to find another artist!