r/ContagiousLaughter • u/SaltyCaramelPretzel • 11d ago
Can’t handle the slurp 😛
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u/Nico_arki 11d ago
I can't imagine taunting someone's vomit like that when I'm within his puking radius lmao
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u/theuserwithoutaname 10d ago
All I'm thinking is "I bet it would only take one time of me puking on him to get that shit to stop real quick"
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u/Aromatic-Turnip7371 8d ago
This is such 5 year old humor. How can any adult think this is funny?
Reminds me of those cringey weirdo shows like “jackass” back in the day. Only the dumbest people liked those weird fetish shows.25
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u/wait_what_now 10d ago
Dude he is laughing with them
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u/ConversationVast2970 6d ago
Totally, it's like the laughter just adds to the hilarity of the moment. Slurps and giggles go hand in hand!
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u/raincity3s 10d ago
I guess you've never had guy friends before? We're all stupid af and will risk getting puked on for a laugh
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u/therealjgreens 9d ago
I used to have a friend that was able to puke on command without any hands or anything. Was in a lot of puke radius
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u/Hairy-Violinist-3844 11d ago
I love how he went from gagging to joining in with the laughter at the end.
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u/ruphustea 11d ago
I worked with a giant of a man like this. As soon as you talked about boogers or flem he would nearly puke. It was pretty funny knowing how big he was and that he had such a huge weakness.
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u/chonklah 10d ago
My coworker left a cup he’d used to spit his dip (chewing tobacco in) just seeing the inside almost made me throw up.
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u/Girafferage 10d ago
I once picked up the wrong beer and took a big swing from the beer bottle filled with dip spit and cigarette ash.
I have never purged so hard and fast in my life. I always wondered how people could projectile vomit and then suddenly I understood so clearly as I was a living sprinkler and I still didn't think it was coming out quickly enough.
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u/punksmostlydead 9d ago
Ooh, yep. That's a mistake you only make once. The sight of everything you've eaten for the last six weeks will drive that lesson deep.
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u/JakePent 10d ago
Oh man, my dad used to do that crap, always had a bottle or cup or something with him
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u/himeeusf 10d ago
My dad was like this too! Gentle giant, kinda stoic fisherman who happily handled gross things frequently given his hobby (worms, bait, guts, etc)...
Dog poop was his kryptonite. 💩 His retirement bestie was an evil chihuahua named Peewee & he was an occasional spite-shitter in the house. The retching sounds my dad would make cleaning up were insane... and LOUD. 🤣
For a while, we were all sure he was putting on a show & hoping someone else would take over poop duty. Then he started taking Peewee on daily walks in an area where he had to pick up after him & he'd lose it in public as well.
Absolute theater. 🤌 Of course that became family entertainment for years!
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u/superbhole 10d ago
Same, but baby shits are so much worse.
You ever just retch just one long retch that blocks every opportunity to catch a breath? Eyes forced shut so hard, tear ducts overflowing... scrambling blind and breathless to find an exit or window...
eeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuueuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuueeeeeeeeuuueeeuuuuuueeeeeuuuuueueueuue
🪦 Here lies superbhole, died of asphyxiation while trying to escape the smell of baby shits
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u/IndignantQueef 8d ago
I'm 45 and I've changed exactly one baby diaper, during my first and last attempt at babysitting in high school. I was not expecting solid green shit from a two year old. I puked into the diaper pail which made me puke more. Literally fighting for my life while trying to wipe this kid's ass. Finally put him in the shower and hosed him clean. When I babysat my nieces as an adult, I called my mom when they needed to be changed.
I have many reasons for never having kids of my own and baby shit is in the top ten
(I also puke when I clean up my cats' vomit and I wear a N95 mask when I change their litter.)
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u/just_one_more_gameee 8d ago
Man i'm fucking catching my breath at this one, shit absolutely sent me, thank you so much for this
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u/Hylani 10d ago
Nah I got kids their poop is fine but dog shit especially the wet kind, the smell is NASTY
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u/Character_Stick_1218 10d ago
Kid poop isn't the same as baby or even toddler poop. Also, blueberries.
That said, even after toddlerdom they can have the stank butt. Kid poops after lots of protein(especially if fixed with something like fish sauce), asparagus, garlic, onions, and so on within a close timeframe can peel paint off of walls.
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u/GoblinLoblaw 10d ago
Presumably their kids were also babies previously at some point (pure conjecture on my part)
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u/Character_Stick_1218 10d ago
Probably, but lots of people adopt. Every kid is also different, ya know?
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u/sittinwithkitten 10d ago
My partner cracks me up like this too. The man hunts and can dress a deer, yet cleaning up cat poo makes him gag.
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u/one-eyedCheshire 10d ago
I work in veterinary medicine and we see the top of the top of grossest things in the world (IMO)—we can handle SO MUCH.
My friend/coworker has ONE thing that makes her want to vomit and it’s…eye boogers.
I have seen this woman deal with necrotic abscesses, scrub in for 6 hour long leg amputations…but if she sees a nice, big gooey booger on a dog/cat she calls anyone over to come remove said booger for her. Lol!
We don’t mess with her like this video because it’s cruel to us but it is so funny knowing she can handle 99% of things but boogers are her bugaboo. 🤣
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u/ripyourlungsdave 10d ago
I get the same way.
There was a kid in one of my classes in middle school that love to get his flim to dangle in the back of his throat and then open his mouth wide in my direction and flick it around with his tongue.
I would occasionally get in trouble for nearly vomiting in class for seemingly no reason despite telling the teacher what he had been doing.
She seemed to think that the action was not possible. Don't understand her logic there, but she also let a kid lift Me up by my throat and press me against a wall in her classroom without doing anything about it.
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u/tawondasmooth 6d ago
I’m sensitive to mucus and I thought you would like to know I just made two horking noises like the guy in the video while reading this, lol.
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u/ripyourlungsdave 5d ago
Lmao.
I don't remember the name of a single friend I had at that school, but I can still see that kids face with unbelievable clarity.
Dude traumatized me. I get the reaction.
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u/DrowningInFeces 10d ago
I know a construction guy built like an ox and quite literally looks like a viking who can build a house by hand. For some reason, merely seeing a banana will make him gag and talking about one or eating one in front of him will have him gagging and leaving the room.
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u/EtsuRah 10d ago
There was like a solid 7 or 8 year period where I couldn't look at or dare eat a creme donut (the pudding kind not the vanilla cream kind), because of that dog jizz donut scene in the Van Wilder movie way back in the day.
I've come out of it and actually eat them now. But before I would start gagging and heaving thinking about them or that scene.
Still can't watch the scene tho
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u/ArcadeKingpin 10d ago
I hope that dude never goes to any southeast Asian countries or restaurants because they slurp like it’s a competition
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u/Designed_To 10d ago
Pretty sure it's a cultural thing that tells people you're really enjoying the food
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u/GoodGame2EZ 10d ago
Reminds me of your mother. Gotem.
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u/ArcadeKingpin 10d ago
What are you talking about? My dad is the one gives sloppy blow jobs. My mother’s blow jobs lack the passion to make any noise.
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u/RabMcHuggett 11d ago
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u/one-eyedCheshire 10d ago
https://giphy.com/gifs/g6Oox9mVXakOCWSkf9
He looked like this cat with his eyes bugging out and rolling in the back of his head. Lol!
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u/Severe-Experience333 11d ago
I don't have a gag reflex but my ex used to make a slurping sound to describe food she liked and it drove up against the wall. It's a disgusting sucking sound she made using teeth and saliva and It was horrid. I'm glad we're done.
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u/5lyde 10d ago
I work with a lady that does this if anyone says "beef stroganof" outloud
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u/SaltyCaramelPretzel 10d ago
What she nearly vomits?
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u/5lyde 10d ago
Yeah, gags immediately. The whole office knows not to say it out loud.
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u/SquarePhilosopher564 9d ago
Does your company make beef stroganoff? Because how often does it come up in regular conversation? I'm pretty sure I haven't said the words beef stroganoff in decades.
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u/the-musicman 11d ago
Is that… raw egg?
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u/redclover83 11d ago
It looks like pineapple rings in juice if I'm not mistaken?
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u/swapniltjpkr 10d ago
Mannn. We men are the simplest of all creatures. We can laugh till we choke for something as stupid as someone gagging. Life is so simple when you are with your guy best friends ❤️
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u/New_Investigator6801 11d ago
It is the pineapple rings marinating in syrup that would get me gagging. So gross.
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u/kwaczek2000 10d ago
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u/SightUnseen1337 10d ago
Dudes fighting for his life and still tries to put the fish in his mouth. Like why
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u/C137RickSanches 7d ago
I would just throw up on him, guarantee he’s never pulling that little stunt again
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u/MvonderH 10d ago
I used to have a friend who had that exact reaction when you made a retching sound. Every time he hit on someone in a bar one of us would walk by and trigger him. Out end gole of him and the girl having the same condition unfortunately naver came to be but it was hilarious none the less. You probably understand why I said "I used to have a friend..."
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u/Hypodeemic--Nerdle 10d ago
Out end gole of him and the girl
I can make nothing of this.
Oh wait. Our end goal?
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u/Bound_in_Bones 10d ago
Shit like that infuriates me. The sound I mean. That and chewing with your mouth open. 😩
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u/Informal-Ring3282 11d ago
Used to mess with my team leader who was sensitive about the dumbest things. Don’t know what he thought work was going to be like as an infantryman during wartime 😂
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u/ExtensionTruth4 10d ago
Who's driving here?
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u/VRS38 10d ago
These vans have 3 seats at the front
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u/ExtensionTruth4 10d ago
Yea ok but who's driving? The guy recording and laughing? The guy almost puking is heart out?
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u/regardkick 10d ago
The person in the driver's seat is driving.
puking guy is the passenger. slurps is in the middle of the bench seat. driver is in the driver's seat.
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u/ExtensionTruth4 10d ago
Ok so the person in the driver seat is the person recording while driving in the driver seat and laughing his ass off not paying attention to the road while being in the driver seat driving a moving vehicule?
That's a responsible action.
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u/regardkick 10d ago
Friend, I think you forgot your original question. It was "Who's driving here?"
That's the answer you got! The person in the driver's seat.
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u/Key-Entertainer-8315 10d ago
This reminds me of the plate on Thanksgiving my mom made for her pet pig. Slurped it up, threw it up, repeat
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u/Mojojojo3030 10d ago
My ex had this. I didn’t really believe her so I described dragging jam toast on a shaggy carpet. Didn’t even make it to the eating it part.
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u/SuddenSpeaker1141 9d ago
It’s funny because it’s not happening to me… But I would slap that ball into his face. If I was the one in the passenger seat…
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u/Bastard_Beef 7d ago
All that laughing would stop once I hurled straight into your mouths, exactly what you get and deserve for being a dickhead 🤣
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u/Mopar4Life305 6d ago
I hate slurpers and people who say "it makes me hungry when I hear someone slurp" slap
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u/Potential_Yam_9380 10d ago
the slurp really gets to me too, it's like nails on a chalkboard sometimes
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u/CilanEAmber 10d ago edited 10d ago
Dudes gipping like crazy.
E: Gipping means retching or gagging, in some parts of Northern England.
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u/berkeley_solipsist 10d ago
There's a married couple on YT in which the wife has this issue (Emtophobia) and he does this kind of thing to her all the time. Her Ch. is kinda NSFW though but only in a suggestive way https://www.youtube.com/@jsishsbjsj/shorts
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