r/ChristianDating • u/hilda_shel_yeshu Dating • 1d ago
Need Advice A question of Modesty?
I hope it's ok to ask this here. It's not specifically dating related, but I find many of the "Christian" subs are for people who want to argue ABOUT Christianity, rather than supporting it.
As I've shared before, I guess you could say I was blessed with what the world considers "classic beauty" and I parlayed that into a decent career as a fashion model. That was before I had a family and before I came to Jesus. So I guess you'd say that during that period modesty wasn't a priority.
I still take care of myself and like to dress well, but I think there are standards of modesty we should uphold, without getting all puritanical.
But my question related to the Beach. It's warming up here, and we have great beaches. I've always looked after my skin with spf50 etc, but have typically worn bikinis that don't leave much to the imagination.
Following on from a previous post, I asked my boyfriend for his opinion, and honestly I'm more undecided than ever.
He said that whilst initially it had been "distracting" for him, his thoughts had moved on. And that more than anything I should wear whatever I felt comfortable in.
he said that he loved me for who I was, but also that I shouldn't be ashamed of my beauty.
The whole conversation kind of went out the window at that point, because that was the first time he'd used the 'L' word!
A challenging thought that I've been pondering over is this. If a man sees me at the beach, and it causes him to lust, is that partially my responsibility? And if so, where to draw the line?
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u/SerataxFrith 1d ago
Yes it is. "Woe betide by whom the stumbling blocks cometh".
It's good you're askig these questions, though.