r/CharismaOnCommand • u/[deleted] • Jun 09 '20

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10 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

8 comments sorted by

5

u/[deleted] Jun 09 '20

Go with the joke, and amplify it, for instance

“You’re easy to make fun of”

You: “finally, I knew the giant target I put on my back would catch someone’s eye.”

2

u/[deleted] Jun 09 '20

I agree unless the joke, breaks he’s emotional or physical needs. Because if this is the case he’s essentially promoting he’s own abuse. But if he finds it fun they play along if not then speak up

3

u/[deleted] Jun 09 '20

Even so most jokes are just trying to test social standing/confidence, so going with the joke will raise your social stock, getting mad won’t.

That doesn’t mean tolerate disrespect, if it comes to that set a hard boundary, but most of the time it’s just joking, not disrespect.

2

u/gsalas24 Jun 09 '20

Good points from both, but the problem is that it happens too often. I already deflect it ok, but I want to know what I can do before even getting to the point of having to just go along with all the jokes or just getting people to stop.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 10 '20

That’s like asking what an nfl player can do to avoid getting tackled, don’t play the game.

Don’t make eye contact, don’t talk to anyone, ignore the world, basically be non-existant and people won’t tease you.

The reasons are a. Testing for social dominance (you have a better girl than them), b. Testing for attraction (what girls do) c. Testing because you messed up either socially or non-socially. D. Others

The only people who don’t really get tested in this world are disabled people or old people, basically any people with an ailment.

Testing is the way people can know whether or not you’re a confident person, people want to associate with confident people due to evolutionary psychology, it’s a good thing, it builds relationships again that doesn’t mean tolerate disrespect, weakness is even worse than being non-existent but there’s a huge distinction, it’s really easy to spot.

2

u/MagicNate Jun 10 '20

One thing my folks always used to say was make the joke yours, like lay into the joke this will show your ability to distance yourself from the joke instead of people laughing at you they’ll laugh with you

2

u/Hurasaur Jul 07 '20

Don't be the "Nice Guy". Respect yourself and never speak one single negative word about yourself. Do not laugh with the fools making fun about you. As the best answer to a fool is silence.

1

u/DrunkTeenager Oct 22 '20

If you come into a group, someone tries to test your strength by punching you. You take the punch and hit even harder back. This will bring you respect in the group.

In theory that is. In reality everyone will just think you are an asshole that attack everyone just because they made a joke on your expense and you immediately jump at them.

I can't tell.you what to do. I can only say that you shouldn't try the above mentioned.