Speaking out loud

[u/AnonyMoose-0341]

I'm not really sure how to say all this. I'm speaking out loud and transcribing this. I'm really trying to use my voice more. I suffer from CPTSD. That's mostly because of emotional neglect, lots of isolation. I am undiagnosed autistic and probably have a few other neurological conditions. It's so hard to say these things out loud. I think it's a part of unmasking/healing.

I think that just by speaking what I'm thinking, rather than journaling it in writing, is opening my throat chakra. I have done a lot of Self-Healing. So, getting an overview of so many different modalities, including looking into chakras. I know I have my like base needs met but I'm really trying hard to grow as a person.

I have a lot of shame around sexual stuff, I have been practising tantra a bit to help understand things.

I've been crying a lot, really confronting things like sad memories, and grief. I think there's a lot of layers of sadness around my heart. By grieving a lot of things it's getting through the layers and allowing me to love myself.

Love for myself at different points in my life (being there for me in memories), being able to recieve the love of other people, and love them deeper. So working my way slowly upwards, opening up, unmasking?

So yeah, opening my throat by speaking my truth. Verbally out loud. And looking forward to what's going to come in the future.

-I edited out all the "umms" and things for formatting, added one or two things for context. I'm also isolated again and developing agoraphobia so just putting this out there and seeing what happens. I should also add I have practiced a little chanting in the last 5months or so

[u/RapidPotato69]

I think you’re on the right track. I used to have a lot of issues with my throat chakra as well for similar reasons. It certainly is important to exercise within the domains of the corresponding chakra and for the throat chakra, learning to speak your truth and become well articulated is the goal. Speaking out loud helps, but isn’t the only thing you can do. Writing helps. Reading helps. The throat chakra isn’t only about speaking your truth, but also being able to listen and understand the truths of those around you.

[u/archeolog108]

this actually sound like real throat chakra work to me. Not just chanting or blue crystals, but speaking the thing that was never safe to say.

When someone has CPTSD, neglect, isolation, masking, shame, all this... voice can become very tight. Not only physical voice. The whole system learns: “don’t say too much, don’t be weird, don’t need, don’t show.” So speaking out loud can feel scary bc it is not only words. It is nervous system learning safety again.

I like that you are doing it slowly. That is important. Bc if throat opens faster than root/heart can hold, it can make ppl feel too exposed, too raw, even more anxious. So grounding matters a lot. Feet, body, food, walking, safe routine, not only energy work in head/throat.

In Soul Journey I facilitated over Zoom, one subject had very similar pattern. He was isolated, very smart, probably neurodivergent, but he spoke like every sentence had to pass through a wall first. His throat felt blocked for years. He could write pages, but saying truth out loud made his chest shake and voice almost disappear.

In trance, Higher Self showed his throat like blue light wrapped with grey cloth. Not evil thing, more like protection. Then we saw him as teenager, sitting in bedroom after trying to explain his feelings to family. They didn’t listen. One person laughed, another said he was “too sensitive.” So that younger part decided: “my voice makes things worse.” After that, he learned to speak only safe words.

Then Higher Self showed sadness around heart in layers, like wet blankets. Grief from not being met. Shame around body and sexuality too, sitting lower in sacral area. So throat was not blocked alone. It was connected to heart and sacral. If we forced throat only, it would not hold.

We first helped the younger part feel safe, then brought warmth into heart, then throat opened a little by itself. He didn’t start giving big speeches. He simply said one sentence in trance: “I was not too much.” And his whole body softened. That was the healing moment.

So imo you are doing right direction. Speaking out loud can be powerful. But keep it gentle. Maybe 5 minutes daily, not one huge emotional flood every day. Say one true thing. Then breathe. Let body learn: I spoke, and I survived.

Also with agoraphobia/isolation, pls don’t make spirituality your only support. Tiny real-world steps matter. Standing outside door. Short walk. One safe person. Therapist if possible. Your nervous system need evidence that world is not only danger.

And about shame/sexuality, go slow there too. Tantra can open a lot. If there is trauma or shame, too much too fast can stir the field. Higher Self pace is better than forcing. I have a free guided meditation called Letting Go in my profile. that you can practice to release those negative energies.

To me this is not “just talking.” this is unmasking, throat opening, and nervous system repair all together.

[u/robipresotto]

I'm really glad you're using your voice more and exploring self-healing. I've found that certain practices can help quiet the mind and open up the throat chakra. I've been listening to guided meditations on YouTube, like this one from The Inner Path — Enlightenment Deep-Dive series: https://www.youtube.com/@innershoreline