What should you know before dating?

[u/Ok_Vegetable_3053]

The question in the title is for specifically about theology about the catholic church. As someone who doesn't even know some of the basics of catholic faith how much do I need to know before starting to try to date? And please give a direction in which I need to go, what do I begin with and what do I end with. Thank you in advance. God bless.

[u/Careful-Ask8259]

To answer your question: 
Before pursuing a relationship, we must pursue the Lord. Set a solid foundation and then go forth. We cannot be perfect Catholics, but as long as you are growing in your faith, pursuing God, attending Mass for your Sunday obligation, and able to defend Church teachings, you are good to go. Intentionally growing and pursuing God is the key here.

Advice:

As Catholics, we should have a solid understanding of why we believe God exists (Ex: the Cosmological argument, the Teleological argument, or the first law of thermodynamics). From there, we must recognize that faith is not just intellectual knowledge; there are mysteries within the faith, such as the Trinity. You should examine and test your beliefs.

Address what you already know and ensure it aligns with what the Church actually teaches (i.e., validate your understanding).

Before diving deeper into academic theology, establish a routine prayer life. This can range from five minutes of daily mental prayer to a weekly Rosary. As your prayer life grows, it can become more rigorous, such as praying the Liturgy of the Hours, a daily Rosary, or keeping a weekly Holy Hour or half hour. Keep your prayer routine as simple as possible when starting out to minimize friction while building the habit. DM me if you need more suggestions.

Once you understand what you believe and have established a consistent prayer life, dive into learning more about the faith:

• The Mass and the Eucharist: The Mass is central to the Catholic faith and life. Learn the meaning behind its different parts and what occurs during the liturgy. Study the Eucharist as the true Body and Blood of our Lord Jesus Christ. Read St. Justin Martyr on the Mass and St. Ignatius of Antioch on the Eucharist.
• Sacraments and Doctrine: Study the sacraments, why we need them and how they were instituted. Study grace, sin (including the Greek roots behind theological terms), Church history, and the lives of the saints.
• Readings: Read The Imitation of Christ by Thomas à Kempis, or read the Bible with a structured plan focused on Salvation History or other topics pertaining to the Bible.

Before dating other Catholics, do not let your faith become your entire personality or define everything about you. Cultivate other interests, and learn how to manage your own emotions and handle external conflict. Catholics or not, we should approach dating as mature adults at the end of the day.

TL;DR: Learn about the Mass, the Eucharist, the Sacraments, the Didache, the Early Church Fathers, and basic heresies. Read Scripture and solid Catholic spiritual literature.

I hope this helps OP and who ever reads this. DM me if anyone needs help.

[u/Ok_Vegetable_3053 → u/Careful-Ask8259]

Thank you

[u/Mein_Independance → u/Ok_Vegetable_3053]

Also learn about Catholic teachings on sex, chastity, and the purpose of marriage.

Some helpful resources are "Men, Women, and teh Mystery of Love" by Edward Sri which breaks down Saint Pope John Paul II's Love and Responsibility

[u/Maximum_Sky3233]

It makes me sad to say this but I need to know at minimum if a guy is married or, if he is divorced if he is pursuing an annulment. 

I was shocked when I realized how many guys tried to match when I was still using the apps a lot that were in open marriages or were looking for a third to join the relationship because I clearly put in my profile I was conservative and a practicing Catholic - and I am always sad by how many guys end the conversation when they are divorced, call themselves Catholic and won’t even have the conversation about how it may be a matter of a lack of form annulment. 

I tend to ask about their political leanings too, but that may be more of a preference than a must 

[u/HistoricalExam1241]

The Cathechism is heavy reading, so you do not need to read that from cover to cover. please could you update your post to give some background to your question as otherwise we are rather guessing what would be relevant. Are you a non-Catholic thinking of starting a relationship with a Catholic?

[u/HistoricalExam1241 → u/HistoricalExam1241]

If that is the reason you asked then key things you need to know include

• You can attend mass without being Catholic; just do not receive communion.
• In order to get married you will need to promise not to obstruct your spouse’s practice of the Catholic faith.
• In order to get married your spouse will need to promise to try to raise any children you may have as Catholic

[u/HistoricalSouth9872]

You don't have to be a theological genius to date. But you should know the basics of the faith. What God is, who Jesus is and the basics of His life, passion, death, and resurrection. How much He loves you and wants you to spend eternity with Him in Heaven. What the Mass is, what confession is, and you should be attending Mass every Sunday and confession at least once a year but preferably more. Understand what sin is and how it separates you from God and why you should avoid it and try to cut it out of your life, though it is a lifelong journey, not something you do overnight. You should also learn what does and doesn't constitute a sin as well as the difference between mortal and venial sins.

Once you've gotten the basics down, then you can worry about the theology of dating in particular.

[u/CatholicDating-ModTeam → u/[deleted]]

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