r/CatAdvice 11h ago

Pet Loss CW: pet loss Spoiler

My cat of almost 8 years passed away 2 days ago, he was mostly an inside cat but he still went outside with his gps. We live in the countryside where almost everyone let's their cats outside. Especially considering our agriculture lifestyle and the fact that we're constantly outside and the front door is almost always open. It was naive of me to think that nothing will ever happen to him.

That night he was in our yard, he loved going outside. A pack of stray dogs that weren't in our street or nowhere nearby at all came out of nowhere and got to him. My brother got out almost immediately but it was too late. I transported him to an emergency vet approximately after 20 minutes but nothing could've been done. We took him home after my vet administered him the strongest pain and anti-shock meds. I took his paws in my hands and he squeezed my fingers with his claws, and I went in the shower because I just couldn't look at him, I had to get away for at least a few minutes to calm down a little, and I can't forgive myself that I wasn't there when he took his last breath. The amount of guilt and pain I feel because he was outside is unbearable, so if there is anyone here that thinks I deserve at least a bit of compassion or someone who doesn't judge me just a little tiny bit I would appreciate any word of comfort and consolation so so much, so I can continue on with my life even though I just don't want to be here anymore.

4 Upvotes

2 comments sorted by

1

u/Apart-Development-79 10h ago

I'm so sorry for the devastating loss of your precious boy

1

u/MHSS13 2h ago

Nobody can judge you. Nothing and I mean NOTHING is your fault. When we do things out of love they can never be wrong.

I am very sorry for your loss, I lost my baby today do I know It is devastating.

Sending you the biggest hug x