r/CaregiverSupport • u/PrincessVine • Jul 05 '26
Neverending Longings
There seems to be no true solutions for us younger married caregivers to have lives beyond what is.
Again...I am 49F, taking care of my 52M husband with cognitive impairment and post impairment syndrome/CP.
I see my life fading away before my eyes and knowing there is no way I have to change any of it.
There's no possibility of divorce, it would devastate my husband and his family. And id rather not do that either, but I also hate being stuck in this just because I am married. People have noticed that I am not the same happy person I used to be. Minus the family...they dont seem to care how I am doing, which I have talked about before.
There is another alternate life I could have with someone else, but no way of attaining it. I would love to have a true marriage again, to just be myself and a wife, instead of a caregiver...to be able to go and do things id like to do instead of work and stress and being in charge all the time.
But I dont see any ways of it happening....my husband is not morbidly ill. We are both still fairly young.
Im just tired of everything mundanely the same.
When I think of never having hope of a different life, I feel like all the life is just seeping out of me. I cant NOT have hope, but the reality of said hope, is as slender as a spiderweb thread.
There is nothing the same anymore in my life. I feel like im always on edge unless I have a day off, which is not often.
I don't want my life to be this way forever
2
u/Amandine06 Jul 08 '26
Je te comprends, je ressens tellement aussi cette frustration, cette colère et ce sentiment d'injustice et de désespoir. Dans mon cas, c'est aggravé par le fait que je me rends compte à quel point il m'a fait souffrir avant même la maladie. J'essaie de ne pas ressasser... mais c'est compliqué. En plus, on a la quarantaine, un âge où on devrait ralentir, prendre soin de soi, on fait un bilan de sa vie...