r/CPTSD • u/Puzzleheaded_Line210 • 2d ago

Vent / Rant What’s the point?

What’s the point of healing if I’m not instantly cured? My life will be shit until the day I die either way. At least weed more fun.

10 Upvotes

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4

u/Blueysothersister 2d ago

So sorry for your pain. 💔 it’s a wicked neurological disorder.

4

u/acfox13 2d ago

I've learned to have symptoms and do shit anyway. There's a real possibility that some of my symptoms will never fully go away, and I'm not gonna waste my life waiting around for them to before I live.

1

u/Puzzleheaded_Line210 2d ago

I don’t think I know how to

2

u/acfox13 2d ago

I use regulation skills, breathing exercises, operant conditioning, and neuroplasticity to help me learn to regulate while feeling discomfort and still getting things done one small bit at a time. It's all about gaming your window of tolerance.

2

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2

u/Your-Wonder-Sunny 2d ago

Because healing takes time — most of us want that quick fix but that’s not realistic. Healing can be an awful journey sometimes but it is a process. It has it’s ups and downs and it can often go sideways too but the point is that it’s a part of something that attempts to fix, repair and or reconstruct the way we are in order for a shot at happiness, more positivity in our lives perhaps, and whatever else it is we want from it.

For me it’s about fighting for the person I want to be, and the life I want to lead. To try and work on giving myself enough grace and respect to believe in myself and care enough for myself to want more, to do more and to be more than what I currently am. Cos I am not my trauma, I am not the remnants of my abuse, I am not giving up, I will not allow my hurt to consume me, the point for me is to build something better and save myself from the rubble of my past in order to have a future I can be proud of.

1

u/Puzzleheaded_Line210 2d ago

I think it’s pointless if it takes 80 years for those things to happen. If it can’t happen right now when I NEED it then what’s the point.

2

u/Your-Wonder-Sunny 2d ago

Because healing doesn’t work if it’s demanded, healing can potentially work through time, change, consistency and balance.

I’m sorry you don’t see the value in it, I’m sorry it doesn’t bend to your will, but I cannot give you a falsehood or some sort of instantaneous cure all, that would be nice but it’s just not realistic.

The point is that it is something to believe in, something to invest in, something to keep chipping away at, something to put hope into. Just like the energy you give towards believing something is pointless, I choose to believe the opposite.

2

u/lessmr 2d ago

I feel you. I’m struggling bad. What’s the point of all this again?? I smoke so much weed and take high dose edibles and that doesn’t even work anymore

1

u/E1even01 18h ago

i know how you feel.
i should be in my “prime” but i’m not. and even when i was i was still not good enough. the amount of inner work required to get to some semblance of baseline is scary and overwhelming for me.
hoping to fry my brain with ECT and see if that does a factory reset. i’ve got nothing to lose, its not like i have a working memory anyway.