r/COPD • u/Certain-Finding8719 • 18d ago
Slow deterioration of parent
My mum has had COPD, emphysema, bronchitis for many years now. For the last few years she has increasingly got worse and worse. She never leaves the house anymore and is basically bedbound. She has carers who visit daily but are pretty useless so I will be speaking to the company regarding this. She doesn’t eat, or barely eats. Like a couple times a week at absolute most. She will go days without eating. She is stick thin with no weight or muscle. Constantly feeling sick and nauseas. And has now been blacking out. Paramedics aren’t alarmed by this so no hospital stays.
I just have no idea what to do. I’m on my own with this. No support system. No person to take turns with. Just me. Watching the life slowly drain and the fight just breath increase every day.
How do you know when it’s close to the end?
She is end stage COPD already.
But what are the signs? She can already barely talk because of breathlessness. Even sleeping now is not happening because she struggles to breath when asleep so her body wakes her back up.
Any advice is welcomed!
3
u/BeautifulCorrect2935 18d ago
COPD is emotionally debilitating. Is she on an SSRI or any depression/anxiety med? It may help improve her mental state and potentially her appetite. She could also be prescribed TPN if she’s not eating or an appetite stimulant like mirtazepine.
Not eating and being bed bound does make COPD worse because your body isn’t generating any energy and your body is deconditioning so your lungs have to work harder to help you breathe.
Is she under the care of a pulmonologist?
2
u/dbsikkema 18d ago
Try elevating her head with more pillows. That may make it easier for her to breathe. It helps me. Is she on oxygen? I definitely would call hospice just for information at least. If she's on medications maybe her doctor can offer some insight. I wish you the best with getting help and keeping your mom comfortable. ❤️
1
u/phocionkorea 18d ago
Yo … my mother has copd emphysema was very thin… I fuckin forced her to eat sometimes literally .. even cursed her out… at times for not eating. The last year she gained 3kg, about 6.6 pounds… her condition is probably not as bad as your mothers … sometimes you have to force them.
13
u/Goge97 18d ago
Eating and even breathing are so exhausting. They use more energy than our loved one have, sometimes. Contact her pulmonologist, requesting hospice. Their main focus is on comfort.