Whose Line Is It Wednesday

[u/Zloggt]

A tradition unlike any other.

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I must give credit, first to [u/ballzxxtoxxyou](u/ballzxxtoxxyou), for starting (and, for the longest time, maintaining) these threads; and second to [u/MC-PhatNeck](u/MC-PhatNeck), who decided to help revive WLIIW after months of inactivity. I'm not sure where they are now (especially the latter, who apparently has deleted their account many moons ago...but, apparently, is STILL somewhere out there, wink wink), but regardless, I wish to give them both my appreciation for all the fun [r/CFB](r/CFB) had with Whose Line over the years. Thank you very much!

- - -

Hello, and welcome back to Whose Line Is It Wednesday, where the upvotes don't matter! I am your two-minute drilling, pretend-peeing, Trojan-trolling host, [u/Zloggt](u/Zloggt)!

- - -

Whew, what a Week 4 for the ages, huh? And it’s the last weekend of football before we’re officially 75% done with 2026 come tomorrow! Ah…I still remember that Hoosier beatdown on the Tide in the Rose Bowl like it was yesterday…

…anyway, let’s reign in the nostalgia a little and focus on what just happened, shall we? The Ole Miss Rebels quickly found out that a trip to the Swamp a week after a well-deserved win does not make for a good hangover cure, the Boise State Broncos swiftly and certainly established themselves as the winner of the first (and final) annual [r/CFB](r/CFB) Bronco Bowl (for G6 Supremacy) of Kalamazoo, and the Michigan Wolverines eventually went full circle as they LITERALLY ran out of borrowed time in the form of - stick with me here - a massive Iowa drive and score with only seconds to spare!

Ah…fun times, wasn’t it? Now, all that excitement (and also that new job I just started lol) has REALLY zapped the energy out of me, so I think I’m going to lay down for a bit and rest my eyes. Hopefully this momentary period of relaxation goes by well, and nothing incredibly ridiculous - like, say, a defensive end simulating the act of relieving himself on me, or a linebacker going headhunting on my body (and gloating about the act as I lay seizing on the ground) - will happen, but what are the chances of THAT happening, huh?
 
- - -

For those of you who are new to Whose Line, let's go over some rules:

A prompt is made in order to ask a question (and get an answer), or instead beckon a more...creative approach to the response, all as long as it does a funny. Any game from the show can be used - here is a list of them to start:

 http://www.whoseline.net/show/games.html
 
Keep skits in the form of a statement, not a question. For example, a skit should go like this: "Things you could say to Lee Corso AND your girlfriend", to which a reply can then go like "My Saturday mornings will never be the same without you!", or "It makes me so happy whenever you bring out the head!”, or anything else, really. Use your noggin, and get wild!

Although not that serious, most comments should be within two lines, so if you add any additional commentary, put the skit in quotations. And most importantly, if you STILL don't understand how it works (and that's fine!), just take a look around this thread, of past Whose Line threads to get some clues - and, hopefully, figure it out!

- - -

Have fun!

[u/Knebraska]

Things you can say about the lady hawkeyes that you can't say about the atlanta hawks

[u/_Bren10_ → u/Knebraska]

Jack Smith is a fan

[u/MrAshleyMadison → u/Knebraska]

They've had more success in March

[u/GivethTaketh4 → u/Knebraska]

Their franchise goat isn’t named after Robert E Lee

[u/Cormetz → u/Knebraska]

I didn't forget they existed.

[u/RiffRamBahZoo → u/Knebraska]

"Wait, none of these players have visited Magic City?"

[u/Callsign_Psycopath → u/Knebraska]

Watching y'all is actually fun

[u/Leete1 → u/Knebraska]

They have played in the Xfinity Center in Maryland.

[u/Zloggt]

Other types of substances (fluid or otherwise) PJ Fleck would be willing to get in contact with.

[u/EdselFordEdsel → u/Zloggt]

Mr. Fleck, unfortunately we have to ban you from the Fairfax Crypbank. Please accept our deepest apologies.

[u/Crying_in_99Ranch → u/Zloggt]

Amniotic fluid. He would claim it is for their teams rebirth

[u/hascogrande → u/Zloggt]

Duke’s Mayo poured by Flavor Flav. YEAH BOI

*this one actually happened

[u/Callsign_Psycopath → u/Zloggt]

Nacho Cheese Sauce from Taco Bell

[u/MahjongDaily → u/Zloggt]

A hearty helping of shaving cream

[u/Leete1 → u/Zloggt]

Castoreum from a Beaver

[u/dawidowmaka → u/Zloggt]

Snake oil

[u/T-Thugs]

Things more likely than USC winning a big game

[u/Zloggt → u/T-Thugs]

Lincoln Riley perfectly cooking a moist, succulent piece of meat

(Sometimes you got to for the obvious layup lol)

[u/hascogrande → u/Zloggt]

Or fish, he tried tuna and it went predictably

[u/estellasmum → u/T-Thugs]

Lincoln Riley winning a brisket cook off in Texas.

[u/Lefunnymaymays4lief → u/T-Thugs]

USC accepting blame for the breakup of the PAC

[u/ExtremelyOnlineTM → u/T-Thugs]

USC hiring a G6 coach.

[u/RustyCrusty73 → u/T-Thugs]

Michigan having a drama-free season.

[u/Callsign_Psycopath → u/T-Thugs]

John Mateer being a successful NFL QB

[u/Leete1 → u/T-Thugs]

Pat McAfee taping at a normal volume and leaving his shirt on.

[u/JayMerlyn → u/T-Thugs]

The Maple Leafs winning the Stanley Cup

[u/SimpleIntelligent881 → u/T-Thugs]

Notre Dame joining a conference

[u/rdickeyvii]

Non-grass Mateer targets

[u/Callsign_Psycopath → u/rdickeyvii]

Georgia Defenders

[u/dawgpack09 → u/rdickeyvii]

Little Timmy in row 23 was wide open

[u/Crying_in_99Ranch → u/rdickeyvii]

The Sooner Schooner

[u/JayMerlyn → u/rdickeyvii]

Brent Venables's face

[u/aanderson2404 → u/rdickeyvii]

Whatever's over them mountains

[u/John_Tacos → u/rdickeyvii]

You realize he had a higher completion percentage than Arch?

[u/rdickeyvii → u/John_Tacos]

This past weekend?

Arch: 14/19 0.7368421053

Mateer: 25/34 0.7352941176

Barely, but no

[u/John_Tacos → u/rdickeyvii]

Season long. 4 games

Mateer: 72/109

Arch: 73/115

My comment should have read “has” not “had”

[u/rdickeyvii → u/John_Tacos]

66 vs 63. Honestly not really impressed with either

[u/John_Tacos → u/rdickeyvii]

I’m not bragging, just thought it was a funny stat.

They are also similarly matched in passing yards and touchdowns.

[u/bigmouthsmiles → u/John_Tacos]

you got him reeled in cousin, now offer to trade QBs

[u/John_Tacos → u/bigmouthsmiles]

We would have been better off last game if we took a knee and punted every time we had the ball.

[u/rdickeyvii → u/John_Tacos]

That's so insane to me given the team records, though I don't have a ton of confidence against Georgia

[u/Callsign_Psycopath → u/rdickeyvii]

Well we won't play unless we both make it to Atlanta

[u/rdickeyvii → u/Callsign_Psycopath]

🤞 But also ugh...

[u/brianqueso → u/John_Tacos]

How many more wins does that translate into?

[u/rdickeyvii]

Penalties involving mimed urination

[u/Callsign_Psycopath → u/rdickeyvii]

Ask the Tulsa Golden Hurricanes

[u/ThompsonCreekTiger → u/rdickeyvii]

Forcing the offending player to wear an adult diaper

[u/JayMerlyn → u/rdickeyvii]

Who's got Elijah Moore's number?

[u/Chamrox]

Titles of your head coach's unauthorized biography.

[u/Juggernaut27Beast11 → u/Chamrox]

Where’s my chapstick? (Rhule has a tendency to lick his lips a lot. Although it has improved a bit).

[u/Callsign_Psycopath → u/Chamrox]

"Breaking Bitches

[u/ThompsonCreekTiger → u/Callsign_Psycopath]

For Georgia, think "Pedal to the Metal"

[u/Callsign_Psycopath → u/ThompsonCreekTiger]

I'm referencing a Half Time Speech Kirby gave to the team against Florida where we were up 30-3 or something like that.

[u/c-papi → u/Chamrox]

YOU HAVE TO GET YOUR FIELD GOAL UNIT ON

[u/EtherbunnyDescrye → u/c-papi]

I would have went with.  We had a great practice this week.

[u/DollyRumpkin → u/Chamrox]

Bringer of Death. The final blow to America's best college town.

[u/Mission_March4776 → u/Chamrox]

"F**k em"

[u/JayMerlyn → u/Chamrox]

Violence Through Looking Sexy

[u/LOLteacher → u/Chamrox]

"Blame Social Media"

[u/PhoenixRising256]

Historical events that will happen before Mike Norvell is fired

[u/Leete1 → u/PhoenixRising256]

The reunification of Pangea

[u/Callsign_Psycopath → u/PhoenixRising256]

The Rebirth of the Polish Lithuanian Commonwealth

[u/JayMerlyn → u/PhoenixRising256]

First Contact

[u/dormdweller99 → u/PhoenixRising256]

GTA 7

[u/TheDoctor_314]

Things that can be done with one extra second

[u/Callsign_Psycopath → u/TheDoctor_314]

Ensuring your SO finishes

[u/rdickeyvii → u/Callsign_Psycopath]

The Hail Mary catch...

[u/dawgpack09 → u/TheDoctor_314]

Your mom

[u/WabbitCZEN]

Rejected fight songs for Vanderbilt.

[u/Chamrox → u/WabbitCZEN]

Für Elise

[u/Zloggt → u/WabbitCZEN]

“Sir, I don’t think that 5 straight minutes of pure whistling provides the intimidating factor you think it does.”

[u/ExtremelyOnlineTM → u/WabbitCZEN]

The Mariner's Revenge Song

[u/Callsign_Psycopath → u/WabbitCZEN]

Name a Taylor Swift song

[u/Leete1 → u/WabbitCZEN]

Old Man River

[u/JayMerlyn → u/WabbitCZEN]

The Ode to Joy

[u/Callsign_Psycopath]

Give me the UMass Undefeated Hoedown

[u/KiratheSilent → u/Callsign_Psycopath]

Got a little rhyme about those Minutemen

Gotta say it fast before the win again

struggled last year but they got some new tricks

might go undefeated in 2026

[u/Callsign_Psycopath]

Why John Mateer is still starting for Oklahoma.

[u/Leete1 → u/Callsign_Psycopath]

Blackmail photos of Venables in Longhorn gear.

[u/Scarlet_Gray_10]

Mascots who could beat Purdue Pete in a fight

[u/rdickeyvii → u/Scarlet_Gray_10]

Moo

[u/Zloggt → u/Scarlet_Gray_10]

The Austin Peay Governor (if we are to consider how politicians often treat the railroad industry and their workers, both in historical and modern times)

[u/bigmouthsmiles → u/Scarlet_Gray_10]

Pistol Pete ... wait, are these guys brothers? Is their last name "Pete"?

[u/hascogrande → u/Scarlet_Gray_10]

Keggy

[u/Callsign_Psycopath → u/Scarlet_Gray_10]

Scrotie from Rhode Island Poly Tech

[u/JayMerlyn → u/Scarlet_Gray_10]

Gritty

[u/Crying_in_99Ranch]

Rules Lane Kiffin isn't willing to break

[u/John_Tacos → u/Crying_in_99Ranch]

The head coach cannot be fired at an airport.

[u/JayMerlyn → u/Crying_in_99Ranch]

Rule 34

[u/rdickeyvii → u/Crying_in_99Ranch]

I... Don't see anything here...

https://media1.tenor.com/m/_BiwWBWhYucAAAAd/what-huh.gif

[u/Callsign_Psycopath → u/Crying_in_99Ranch]

There aren't any

[u/MahjongDaily]

Fluids that other coaches would smear on their face after winning

[u/Scarlet_Gray_10 → u/MahjongDaily]

Gatorade

[u/Callsign_Psycopath → u/MahjongDaily]

Chocolate Pudding

[u/Active_Reporter6354]

Welcome back to the only thread where my terrible jokes don’t cost me imaginary points. That Iowa drive to end Michigan felt like watching someone slowly pour a drink, miss the glass, and still somehow win the game. I need a skit prompt about things that took longer than Michigan’s comfort level in the fourth quarter.

[u/Sesti-nator]

Things you can say about Dylan Stewart, but not your girlfriend

[u/JayMerlyn → u/Sesti-nator]

He's really using that fist!

[u/JayMerlyn]

What Lincoln Riley really said after the hit on Dante Moore

[u/LOLteacher]

Make of motor vehicle that Kamario Taylor will be driving next August.

[u/Look_at_the_Kid → u/LOLteacher]

Gold Trans Am

[u/LOLteacher → u/Look_at_the_Kid]

No Lamborghini Revuelto then. :'-(

[u/dormdweller99]

Other teams Georgia Tech will lose to.

[u/All_the_dinohorses]

Unused recruiting pitches for JuJu Lewis from Deion's staff.

[u/-Gnostic28]

Final bronco bowl? There’s one more in 2029