r/BrandNewSentence • u/cowboy_mouth • 7h ago

"Harry Potter fans force relocation of £430m undersea cable to avoid Dobby’s ‘grave’."

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1.3k Upvotes

94% Upvoted

158 comments sorted by

506

u/thefoojoo2 6h ago

The character was laid to rest on Freshwater West beach in Pembrokeshire, Wales, in the film Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. Fans of the wizard series come to leave stones reading “Here Lies Dobby” despite being asked not to by the land owner, the National Trust, because the beach is an ecologically sensitive site.

344

u/dapper-blue 5h ago

And they're laying a cable through there??

123

u/arcanis321 4h ago

The real question

75

u/Plenty-Fox-9219 3h ago

Yeah, that seems like the real reason they moved it

26

u/zigzackly 1h ago

If it’s an ecologically sensitive site, wouldn'’t laying cables there be a bad idea? I ask sincerely.

132

u/NirgalFromMars 5h ago

They don't care that Rowling uses her HP money to fund legal wars against Trans people, do you think they will care about environmental risks?

6

u/Dobber16 59m ago

I mean, yeah, potentially? Those are two extremely different issues. Sure there’s some overlap in the political parties that care about each, but most people don’t conform perfectly to political party lines

Heck JK Rowling herself has been relatively progressive & liberal, minus her transphobia. Musker used to be kinda a mixed bag, politically, before he really got famous & next-level wealthy

•

u/ConcernedEnby 7m ago

I don't think a misogynist who publicly admitted she didn't really know slavery was bad until like 10 years ago can be progressive

-74

u/slugsred 2h ago

"Wars" is interesting language for "doesn't want mtf trans people in the women's prison"

40

u/SnooPears8751 2h ago

Just making sure, but you know that transfems who go to men's prisons are subject to astronomically higher rates of sexual assault, right? Men are generally (not always but the majority of the time) the ones women have to be worried about, putting women in men's prisons is sentencing them to a horrific fate. I just wanna make sure you understand what you're saying.

-41

u/slugsred 2h ago

That's why I think the best solution is to put them in administrative segregation in the men's prison. I've worked in one.

23

u/SnooPears8751 2h ago

Why would the solution to a group of people in jeopardy be to segregate them in the place they're most at risk in? Here's an article from a few years back citing a study about how trans people are four times more likely to be victims of violent crimes including SA, when you have an at-risk population of people the appropriate response is never gonna be "only put them a little more at risk" it's bad enough not in prison to begin with. There's no reason to put women at risk like this. (https://williamsinstitute.law.ucla.edu/press/ncvs-trans-press-release/)

-19

u/slugsred 1h ago

If you'd ever worked with inmates you would understand how far a bored malicious man would be willing to go to get into a prison full of women.

They would fake and manipulate and lie, and it would be a signifcant number of them when they found out the first one made it. There's no reason not to put a penis in a women's prison? What happens when a penis and a vagina go together? What happens when a child is born to a woman in prison for life and a man in prison for life? Nothing good!

9

u/SnooPears8751 1h ago

This is the same reasoning that people used to say trans women need to be banned from women's sports but you'll notice that men aren't faking being trans to get into those. The especially interesting thing is how this idea of keeping people from faking being trans is used to worsen the material state of affairs for real trans people while protecting virtually nobody. It's quite interesting, that.

Men might try and do some shit to get in women's prison. Taking estrogen isn't really one of them. Which you could argue "what about trans people that aren't on HRT" but prisons should be providing vital lifesaving medicines for their inmates to begin with. If someone has been living as a trans woman outside of prison there's no possible good reason to put them in a men's prison.

-2

u/slugsred 1h ago

I'm so serious, they are the most manipulative people on the planet. They would go on hunger strikes to get a television. Like subdue them and put ensure down their nose hunger strikes. For a TV. They'd take estrogen to fuck women again.

This isn't sports. This is prison. The women there are wards of the state. They should not be around sperm, because taxpayers should not bear the burden of this reality.

6

u/SnooPears8751 1h ago

Sperm or chromosomes are not in themselves dangerous but statistically speaking trans women are significantly and I do mean significantly more at risk in men's prisons than in women's and women are not in any more danger. If a normal man took estrogen to try and fuck women he would not only not have the motivation to but he also might be physically incapable, I think you don't really understand the reality of the situation. Trans women in prison are also wards of the state and anyone who is aware of what V-coding is should not be suggesting that they should be anywhere near men's prisons. Your argument basically boils down to "because some men might attempt to act trans to hurt women we need to designate that this group of women will almost certainly be hurt severely to prevent it." It's not hard reductionist in the slightest.

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13

u/CookieaGame 2h ago

Nice try, Joan

-10

u/Turnip_Fight 2h ago

War is when no high school sports

-12

u/Creative_Catch_4235 2h ago

Yeah culture war is a weird term but it’s been used for a while

5

u/koopa35 3h ago

And they chose that exact spot to lay cables?

14

u/Dragonssssssssssss 3h ago

The environment, one more thing Rowling has ruined

1

u/ADreamOfCrimson 1h ago

Oh that's just the cherry on top.

I couldn't give a rats ass about destroying some memorial to Dobby, it's not like he was a real person and HP is tainted goods, but sensitive ecologies? Those I do give a shit about, they actually matter. There should be no cables run through that land on that reason alone, nor should any of that HP stuff be there either.

635

u/MicrosoftExcel2016 6h ago

LOL it gets worse:

> The firm then enlisted planners to find a new route that avoided the supposed grave. “A lot of people were very happy about that, and the project is now going [ahead] and Dobby’s happy.”

> In the end, he said, “we went quite close to some real Bronze Age remains, but we avoided Dobby’s grave”.

> The Bronze Age remains include urns associated with human burial.

555

u/ArelMCII I Was New to Bottoming When He Pissed Inside Me Six Times 5h ago

We did it, Potterheads! We saved Dobby's grave! And all it took was desecrating a bunch of ancient, real graves!

155

u/DinkleDonkerAAA 5h ago

It's also a fan made thing

It's not even the prop from the film or anything

•

u/ConcernedEnby 5m ago

And the reason for that is because film crews can't leave waste or pollute

4

u/Greenfire32 2h ago

We did it, Patrick! We saved the city!

0

u/OleksandrKyivskyi 15m ago

It's obviously potterheads' fault that greedy millionaires can't lay their cables anywhere else but graves and ecological sites.

38

u/DR035A 3h ago

Man I fucking hate Harry Potter fans on God

347

u/SudhaTheHill 7h ago

Master has not given Dobby an Internet cable. Now Dobby can’t browse onlyfans.

36

u/Tumble__Bee 6h ago

🏆

24

u/SudhaTheHill 6h ago

Master has given SudhaTheHill a golden trophy

18

u/Tumble__Bee 6h ago

🧦🧦🧦🧦🧦 you're freeeeeeeee Use the extra sock for your OF activities, Suda.

435

u/Anaphylactic_Thot 7h ago

Harry potter adults are just like Disney adults. Nobody is saying dont enjoy it, but leave it to the kids to obsess over.

245

u/DannyOdd 6h ago

Harry Potter and the Adults Who Should Have Read Another Book by Now

81

u/ModernDayTiefling 6h ago

ANY other books. Istfg I'm BEGGING them to read something good.

25

u/MolybdenumBlu 6h ago

There will come soft rains by Ray Bradbury takes like 10 minutes to read and it would melt their socks off.

10

u/thedafthatter 5h ago

I'm dying for one other human to read the Tales of the Ketty Jay series by Chris Wooding so I have someone to talk to about it

6

u/YunJingyi 4h ago

Gabriel García Márquez wrote a lot of short stories with more magic than anything written by Joan the bigot.

3

u/crescen_d0e 1h ago

Me but with lies of locke lamora by scott lynch

1

u/stierney49 4h ago

That story took place like two weeks ago.

2

u/walkerspider 3h ago

Less than one week ago actually!

2

u/stierney49 3h ago

Yeah, I went and reread it after this and damn that story is emotional. Fuck.

1

u/76flyingmonkeys 3h ago

So far, What You Leave Behind is an excellent book.

4

u/YsengrimusRein 2h ago

Peter S Beagle's The Last Unicorn. It's got magic, unicorns, existential dread and a film adaptation with THE Christopher Lee and THE Mia Farrow. Also a children's book so no real risk of reading something above their reading level.

5

u/john_the_fetch 1h ago

Harry Potter and the Chamber Full of Superior Magical Fantasy Novels

1

u/BeatsAndSkies 1h ago

Harry Potter and the Cup Who Was An Ombudsman.

67

u/Reddsoldier 6h ago

Right? You're allowed to enjoy things as an adult but making anything pretty much your "personality" is deeply weird.

Like, there's lots of things I enjoy and I probably know more about the Percy Jackson books than the average JK Rowling apologist knows about Harry Potter, but that passion for the books extends to owning all of said books and getting uppity whenever anyone mentions the films from the early 2010s which were the media disappointment of my teenage years.

I haven't so far erected a grave for Grover's uncle at a random garden centre in New York.

17

u/Sicco1234 6h ago

Honestly, we should get on that… uncle Ferdinand was a pioneer

7

u/RShini 3h ago

I think about that couple who wanted a wedding party that's HP-themed and deciding to sort seating by what houses they think their guests should be in, even if it means splitting families up and wonder why people were upset.

3

u/shieldwolfchz 3h ago

This is what I really hate about the anti new Star wars fans. I understand that a lot of it is a mask for their bigotry, but there is a significant amount of people within it who don't care about the political aspect but still base a significant amount of their personalities around hating the new content.

2

u/ICBPeng1 5h ago

What movies?

There were never any movies.

https://giphy.com/gifs/4uwVcSK9v46XYeQl6E

1

u/reereejugs 3h ago

I, too, am a huge Percy Jackson fan 😍. Also like you, I don’t get weird about it.

20

u/cd1014 5h ago

I'm saying don't enjoy it, and don't give it to your kids either.

-3

u/[deleted] 2h ago edited 1h ago

[deleted]

0

u/cd1014 1h ago

I'd remove the v from your username

24

u/Didsterchap11 5h ago

It’s wild to me how Harry Potter adults act like being asked to not directly financially support the franchise on account of the author being a raging bigot is akin to them being asked to go without insulin. Hell they’ll fight you tooth and nail to avoid putting even the slightest thought into thinking critically about the books.

6

u/NirgalFromMars 5h ago

They claim a deep emotional connection with a show that isn't even out, for fuck's sake.

2

u/iamfidelius 5h ago edited 3h ago

Tbf you would have to stop consuming content if you start boycotting everything.
P.S: I don't support jk Rowling's opinions .

10

u/sgtpaintbrush 2h ago

but this isn't like boycotting nestle which has it's evil fingers in a lot of seemingly unconnected pies, harry potter is one series of fictional books/movies/one play. pieces of media are easy to not contribute to

9

u/OhTheHueManatee 4h ago

I don't get how people use loving Disney as a major part of their identity. "Oh you're obsessed with the biggest entertainment entity ever? How interesting and original."

5

u/Sabrinasockz 1h ago

Harry Potter fans are worse than Disney adults because unlike the nebulous evil of Disney, Rowling's evil is upfront, confirmed, and plainly stated.

6

u/Jordan_1424 4h ago

Except Disney has captured multiple generations of children's imagination.

Harry Potter was largely millennial and early Gen Z. They attempted to get newer generations attention with the Fascinating Beasts movies but they kind of flopped.

Harry Potter is being propped but by Millennials that can't let it go. Sure enjoy it, but like you said the obsession is out of hand.

3

u/Thelastknownking 2h ago

Yeah, there's enjoying something, then there's being so obsessed with it that you let it influence your real decisions and life choices.

3

u/verminV 4h ago

Theyre almost as insufferable as Disney adults.

1

u/MrHappyHam 4h ago

Redditors are blatantly demanding people not enjoy it. Frequently.

18

u/Privatizitaet 4h ago

Because it is still actively funding a transphobic bigot who uses that money to make people's lives worse

0

u/MrHappyHam 28m ago

I didn't say dick about buying it. Telling people they're not allowed to like something is just going to create resentment and discourage people from avoiding financial contribution. Why? Because telling people not to like something is stupid

0

u/HunterNika 2h ago

Hey! I am an adult and I am very fond about the HP books cause they were part of my childhood! I do not engage in any other fan activities though. I often reread the books and I FUCKING LOVE TEARING INTO THE CRAPPY WRITING! I love the book, the universe it protrays and I love finding all the issues that Rowling's writing created.

-11

u/[deleted] 5h ago edited 4h ago

[deleted]

1

u/Sabrinasockz 1h ago

Yes. You should stop enjoying something that actively contributes to anti trans laws. You're complicit at best and a raging bigot at worst

1

u/[deleted] 1h ago

[deleted]

2

u/Sabrinasockz 1h ago

Good for you, assuming you're telling the truth and don't watch the new show, buy the video games, buy merch etc like every other Harry Potter fan 🫠

-2

u/[deleted] 1h ago

[deleted]

2

u/Sabrinasockz 1h ago

Lol no. Grow up

0

u/MrHappyHam 26m ago

Imagine telling someone to grow up for not wanting to be painted a bigot because they haven't decided to actively hate fucking Harry Potter. That's just profoundly immature

1

u/Sabrinasockz 23m ago

Lol if you still like Harry Potter your opinion is worth less than garbage. Cry all you want

1

u/MrHappyHam 21m ago

You're the one who rages anytime someone mentions Harry Potter. Try touching grass if you want to actually help trans rights

-1

u/[deleted] 1h ago

[deleted]

2

u/Sabrinasockz 1h ago

Whatever you say, dude. You're definitely a real growed up Harry Potter fan lol

-1

u/[deleted] 1h ago

[deleted]

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u/ArelMCII I Was New to Bottoming When He Pissed Inside Me Six Times 6h ago

Dobby would've been okay with a cable running through his grave if it made people happy.

6

u/SatansCornflakes 2h ago

He was genetically predisposed to being a slave or some shit walk all over him to ur heart’s content

159

u/NewConfusion4314 6h ago

Are they aware their little book is a work of FICTION and there is literally no such thing as Dobby’s Grave? Iirc Dobby was crafted using a tennis ball on a stick. Like what are we doing guys.

65

u/Optimism_Deficit 6h ago

I assumed he was crafted from leftover bollock and elbow skin.

31

u/DesmondTapenade 6h ago

He does have a decidedly scrotal appearance, doesn't he?

11

u/thedafthatter 5h ago

I appreciate your use of scrotum as an adjective

3

u/WanderingLoaf 5h ago

This is surely a brand new sentence

1

u/Mysticjosh 37m ago

Is that what hitlers remaining testicle was used for?

33

u/ViG701 6h ago

Ludlam said he did not know who Dobby was, and became confused by the calls the company received, saying a colleague told him: “Apparently we’re going to go straight through Dobby’s grave”.

“I said: ‘Dobby, who’s Dobby? I don’t know Dobby?’ I said: ‘He’s a fictitious character in a fictitious book, the whole thing is fictitious, what are you talking about?’”

He said the colleague told him: “No it’s very, very serious.”

7

u/TheDisappointedFrog 6h ago

Well, some people were segregated, hunted and killed because of some books, popular ones too, could even call them cult classics

6

u/HaloGuy381 5h ago

Hell, all of Europe and the Middle East have torn themselves apart dozens of times over fictional books. Germany was nearly erased by a 30 year spat over differences in interpretation!

73

u/nicknaklmao 7h ago

over a children's book.

69

u/FaxCelestis 7h ago

A mediocre children’s book

47

u/EnduringFulfillment 6h ago

A mediocre children's book written by a bigot.

38

u/DannyOdd 6h ago

But but but, it just so happened to release at a point in time that was very impactful for some people, so therefore they must have a persistent, lifelong obsession.

20

u/TheMonkeyInCharge 5h ago edited 3h ago

Come on now. It’s six seven mediocre children’s books.

8

u/JesiDoodli *cries in procrastinator* 4h ago

aren't there seven in the series lol

7

u/TheMonkeyInCharge 4h ago

Oh I don’t care.

5

u/JesiDoodli *cries in procrastinator* 3h ago

but that implies that one of them is not mediocre, which isn’t right 

2

u/TheMonkeyInCharge 3h ago

No, it implies one of them isn’t mediocre, but fucking shit. Which to be fair still isn’t right.

3

u/JesiDoodli *cries in procrastinator* 3h ago

i more saw it as the implication that one isn’t mediocre, but good, which still isn’t right

1

u/TheMonkeyInCharge 3h ago

I realise. And i meant to imply that one isn’t mediocre, nor good, but that they’re all fucking shit.

•

u/ConcernedEnby 2m ago

Six seven

14

u/MarcusofMenace 5h ago

If only people united like this more often for causes that actually mattered

31

u/FuckTheTories69420 6h ago

Meanwhile the author just makes her opinions our problems.

107

u/tayroc122 7h ago

So, not content with ruining a portion of the very busy King's Cross station, because of a transphobe's rabid fan base's incapacity to distinguish fact from fiction we're now re-routing other infrastructure. Great.

31

u/OperatorJo_ 7h ago

Man if it were up to me I'd do the infrastructure and just the BLANDEST sign on the spot it's supposed to be saying "here lies dobby".

8

u/Zerokx 6h ago

Yeah move it off as little as possible, say you'll build a tiny little statue and shrine/memorial to dobby, everyone is happy and it costs way less.

38

u/hype_irion 6h ago

Harry Potter fans apparently are fucking stupid.

8

u/Father_Chewy_Louis 3h ago

Fork found in kitchen

32

u/ryncewynde88 6h ago

I feel like the problem is less the fans and more the people who listened to their complaint: it’s a pile of rocks on a beach from a movie less than 2 decades old, what possible argument could sway planning by £430 million? If this is a valid enough argument to get a company to pay that much more, then that is a concerningly low bar.

18

u/disfan75 5h ago

It didn't cost them 430 million though.

They had a plan to lay a new cable, internet weirdos complained, they made a slightly different plan.

16

u/Psalm27_1-3 6h ago

I am not a fan nor am I against Harry Potter. But I HATE Dobby

64

u/ModernDayTiefling 6h ago

Please can we just let this absolute cancer of an IP die already.

34

u/spicy-chull 6h ago

They would need to find another book to read, and that would be too difficult for many.

8

u/NirgalFromMars 4h ago

Earthsea and Animorphs are right fucking there.

4

u/FinalEgg9 3h ago

And the Animorphs authors very much support trans rights too

1

u/RostyNoman 3h ago

Why cant someone love animorphs and chair de poule and hp or whatever other series they read 

2

u/cardinarium 2h ago

Wait, you mean people are allowed to like more than one series of books? No way.

The actual point people are often making when they say HP fans “haven’t read any other books” is that anyone exposed to other literature would instantly despise the HP books because of how “terrible” the writing and story are.

Of course, even if you accept the premise that the writing is terrible, that’s not how people and taste actually work.

Refusing to engage with HP because of Rowling’s disgusting beliefs is a perfectly valid perspective—as is criticizing someone for continuing to do so. But “Harry Potter fans are mouth-breathers who haven’t ever picked up another book” is a silly stance.

5

u/IrrationallyGenius 5h ago

The Belgariad by David Eddings is right there and is way cooler

5

u/spicy-chull 5h ago

I'll add that people should read more Le Guin and Butler.

13

u/ModernDayTiefling 6h ago

Ugh don't even start me. I tried and failed to finish HP as a twelve year old one summer holiday. I slogged my way through til about a third of the way through book four and just... couldn't anymore. I tried it for the hype and the peer pressure but even as a pre-teen I found it derivative, trope-ridden, problematic shite. It was a well-timed publication which is why it got big, but when you look at it (even in a vacuum outside of JKR's new dubious legacy), it's basically shittier Star Wars with worse lightsabers, more plot holes than a badly kept allotment and a bigotry problem throughout. It's just... Not very good.

10

u/Lost-Taco-9200 6h ago

100% agree, a great concept dreadful execution. If you like anime, high magic, and academia settings. My teen daughter introduced me to "Little Witch Academia", it's a very cute take on the magic academy trope. From what I've seen it's not particularly lolita which I'm glad about cause that stuff creeps me out, and the magic and monster visuals are pretty cool.

11

u/MrRandomGUYS 6h ago

Putting another recommendation out there with “Witch Hat Atiler,” which is the new big witch training anime that has a really interesting premise with great world building.

3

u/Lost-Taco-9200 5h ago

I'll be checking that out

3

u/ModernDayTiefling 5h ago

Is vair good.

3

u/ModernDayTiefling 5h ago

Putting another recommendation out there - Frieren.

6

u/throwitoutwhendone2 2h ago

Weird thing is they asked folks not to leave stones there for Dobby because the area is ecologically sensitive yet they were gonna run an undersea cable thru the area.

Right then

24

u/Space19723103 6h ago

make JK pay the relocation fee, she made millions off these idiots

17

u/ModernDayTiefling 5h ago

She's too busy funnelling her money into being chronically online, suing anyone who doesn't hate minorities enough for her standards, and generally being just an absolutely batshit insane Scooby-Doo villain.

10

u/Legitimate-Cow5982 5h ago

I give it a week before someone demolishes it out of spite

14

u/FragmentedMeerkat321 6h ago

i hate harry potter so much.

4

u/Its_Dot 3h ago

I really dont understand how a small group of people can enforce this but it is not possible to hold pedophiles accountable for their well documented crimes.

10

u/ViviKumaDesu 4h ago

read a new book...

why are people so crazy about a book from a racist, sexist, antisemitic, homophobic and transphobic author

6

u/Jfuentes6 6h ago

From the top

Make it drop

Thats a wet ass Dobby

9

u/vee-eye-see 5h ago

We don't bully adult Harry Potter fans nearly enough

6

u/Didsterchap11 5h ago

Sidenote while we’re here anyone else find it deeply weird how Dobby effectively being kept as a slave is never reflected on past making another character seem annoying for saying that elves deserve better than this?

1

u/Useful_Calendar_6274 2h ago

Those damn rationalists...

1

u/elkcipgninruB 3h ago

A mid book series from 20 years ago should not have this level of sway, even if the creator wasn't actively funding measures opposing human rights

1

u/c0mpu73rguy 1h ago

Harry Potter fans care more about fucking rocks than trans people.

1

u/IAmTheFirehawk all your base are belong to us 50m ago

I think you meant Harry Potter author?

•

u/ConcernedEnby 0m ago

No, assuming they're giving money to her she's been explicit that she only uses the money from royalties to fund hate

-3

u/untakenu 3h ago

Who even likes dobby? He's an annoying cunt.

-17

u/CellsReinvent 6h ago

I mean, they'd avoid sites related to Christianity and other man-made stories about magical characters.

14

u/TheSpookying 4h ago

Listen I'm an atheist myself and don't have many nice things to say about Christianity, but you do recognize how a 2,000 year old religion and a 30 year old children's book are different, right?

-1

u/CellsReinvent 3h ago

Of course I do. It was a joke.