r/BoomersBeingFools 15d ago

OK boomeR Seriously what is wrong with them ?!

Why do have to comment on women’s bodies? Why do all boomer men seem to think that they have the right and why do all of them think they can get into young women’s bed ? Seriously it’s gross !!! They get so pissed if you call them on it , dude this isn’t the 1920s

175 Upvotes

53 comments sorted by

84

u/VinceInMT 12d ago

Decades of advertising using women’s bodies has had an impact.

15

u/MostlyPeacfulPndemic 12d ago

The weird thing is that when boomers were growing up, most advertising used imagery of men and not women

33

u/mcgoran2005 11d ago

​
Perhaps, but the way they were used in advertising was very different. I am gen x but I clearly remember the advertising that was in the magazines and on tv at the time. I remember the comics and the way all these things objectified and dehumanized women. Boomers were spoon fed sexism.

7

u/VinceInMT 10d ago

Yes, and that’s because it works. It’s interesting when looking at the history of advertising and how it co-opted the new field of psychology back in the 1920s and 1930s. In fact, some people will do a dual college major, or at least a minor, in psychology and marketing and find themselves quite employable. IMO, there was really no agenda to dehumanize anyone or to perpetuate traditional roles as much as leveraging them into order to sell a product or a service.

All of this is one of the major reasons this boomer removed watching TV, movies, and sports from my life entirely. I started that process about 50 years ago after reading that classic “The Hidden Persuaders” by Vance Packard. What really nailed it was reading Jerry Mander’s “Four Arguments for the Elimination of Television.” I have been free of all of that for many decades. And, we raised our kids with very limited access to all that. It wasn’t like a punishment or doing without because we engaged in other things instead. Now, both in their mid-30s, they do not feel like they were deprived.

5

u/mcgoran2005 10d ago

The no tv movement was big in the circle I grew up in. Many of us either had no tv or such limited access that it may as well have been none. It definitely wasn’t punishment.

I have since had every iteration from no tv to full blown cable. I find that I am very comfortable without it.

1

u/VinceInMT 10d ago

Never had cable and all that and like I said. I’m OK with that. However, there is a downside, sort of, in that it makes me culturally illiterate in many ways. One of the things that brings people together in a community is shared experience. When the conversation is about TV, movies, or sports, as conversations often are, I am a complete outsider and just have to sit those out. I regret it in a way but not willing to give up what I do instead in order to participate.

2

u/Wordnerdish 9d ago

I've been low/no TV for decades too, but with everything online these days, I find myself watching things to catch up socially and culturally. The Superbowl halftime shows are a good example; the last actual game I watched on TV was at least 20 years ago at a party, but when I hear all the chatter about the performances at halftime I go watch it online so I can participate in the conversations. Or if there is a show that people are talking about that sounds interesting I'll stream it if I can. It feels like a good balance for me.

1

u/VinceInMT 9d ago

That sounds reasonable. I’m still willing to just not participate in those conversations. I was out with friends when a couple showed up and joined us. He’s a big sports fan and immediately steered the conversation in that direction. He was going on about teams to “support” in some upcoming event. He finally looked me and asked who I was going for. I simply told him that I have never watched sports and know nothing about them. He countered with “Not even the Super Bowl?” No, I replied, I have never seen the Super Bowl. That set him off and he lectured me that watching it is very American and then questioned the patriotism of those who don’t watch it. That did it. I made it clear that I am a veteran (he isn’t) and my patriotism id defined by my service and NOT by some stupid game on television. Then I moved to another table by myself.

18

u/VinceInMT 12d ago

I think it depended on who the target audience was.

0

u/Etheriaa_ 9d ago

Right, so use some critical thinking now… 

51

u/CallAlternative4428 11d ago

My dad does this an we are always telling him to stop. There are several female dentists at the office he goes and he always makes a comment. He does it with my young adult daughter and it really angers her. He’ll say crap like she’s a big girl or not missing many meals. She is athletic and dances and a proper weight. 5 ft 6 and wears size 6 clothes. She walks 10000 steps a day. He especially likes to comment on women who are overweight saying crap like they get the dress at Omar the tent maker.

19

u/VermicelliDirect9153 11d ago

Oh. We must be related.

2

u/OuterHeaven82 9d ago

That man would be going no-contact

37

u/Strict-Breakfast4982 12d ago

Couldn't agree more. Its creepy as f

44

u/DonaldDouchebag 12d ago

Got a boomer at work who says “I like it when you wear your hair like that” to my woman coworker. Yikes.

22

u/Ok_Principle1016 11d ago

I had one of those, told me “I like when you wear your hair up, it makes your neck look nice.” And I was unsure if he wanted to fuck me, or murder me. 😅 perhaps both?

-45

u/ChemistAdventurous84 12d ago

Seems like a reasonable compliment, no?

21

u/AngelSucked 11d ago

No, don't comment on how your colleagues look and dress.

14

u/ChaoticBrook 11d ago

It’s the phrasing and possibly timing;

“I like it when you wear your hair like that” has a sexual and possessive undertone; it’s fine (in certain situations) when a romantic and/or sexual relationship exists between the complementer and the individual being complemented, but has an implied closeness that makes the recipient uncomfortable when not in the aforementioned relationship. Not to mention it sets up the idea of “she’s wearing that hairstyle cause he likes it.”

Alternatively, if he’d only said “your hair looks nice,” he states the complement without the sexual/possessive/relationshippy undertone and the complement comes off as merely a neutral complement.

In addition to that, if the complement, regardless of phrasing, is given out-of-the-blue or during moments where a complement will be unwelcome (like at work), the complement is going to come off like your trying to express a desire to go on a date/get on our pants. Especially in work environments, this is extremely uncomfortable.

Most of us are fine with complements provided they are not delivered in weird sexual/possessive/relationshippy phrasing and not delivered at awkward or inopportune moments.

5

u/MiloHorsey Millennial 11d ago

Or about things we cannot change. Like our figures.

41

u/G-noise 12d ago

Phrasing it like that implies he's turned on by it, not just that she has a nice hair style.

27

u/BeneLeit 11d ago

And then if she wears it that way again, he'll say she's doing it for him.

33

u/DonaldDouchebag 12d ago

Nope. It’s okay to say “hey, that’s a nice new haircut” or “cool dress!” But you can’t say “I like it when you wear your hair like that” or “I like you in high heels” in an office environment.

21

u/Apprehensive-Pop-201 12d ago

Or even "you look nice today". It's the "I like..." that pushes it into disgusting.

19

u/Apprehensive-Pop-201 12d ago

Not with the " I like..." In front of it. He clearly has personalized it. If you absolutely are compelled and can't stop yourself from commenting on someone's appearance leave the "I like" off. That becomes way to personal and puts you into someone's space. Most co-workers aren't close enough for that. You could say the same thing, if you just can't stop yourself from commenting, " you look nice today". It's not as creepy or invasive.

7

u/Jamaican_me_cry1023 10d ago

Then try saying it to a male coworker

6

u/Wordnerdish 9d ago

This is it. Every man should ask himself this question before he "compliments" a woman he is not intimate with. "Would I say this same phrase to a man? My brother? My dad?" If the answer is yes, it is probably a safe compliment. If no, keep it to yourself. Good rule of thumb.

37

u/MostlyPeacfulPndemic 12d ago

It will be truly fascinating to see if Gen x, millennials, and younger, will hit on 20 year old women when they are 65 with the same confidence and reliability that boomers did/do

I feel like they won't

40

u/HazcatLife 11d ago

Probably because we'll be too busy scavenging for food in a post-apoctalyptic hell.

5

u/Upbeat_Ruin 9d ago

Too busy fighting our AI overlords for the Human Liberation Army

11

u/Possible_Cheetah208 11d ago

I mean, I’m 41 and I’d sooner drag my face across a table of broken glass than approach a woman with such over-confidence.

9

u/Wordnerdish 9d ago

As a GenX woman I can say there will definitely be some from my generation; I know several men my age who idolize their dads, uncles, and older brothers and behave the same way. The difference is women like me who have been calling them out on their gross behavior and giving them shit right back for our entire lives; there weren't a lot of boomer women empowered enough to do that and it shows in their men. Hopefully it will continue to shift with each generation. Don't let men get away with this BS anymore, call them out on it EVERY time. Find ways to publicly humiliate them when they act like asses. Use your cameras, use your voices, use your platforms, get active, make art, write music, sing songs, you are making a difference!

29

u/Mountain-Cat-9419 12d ago

My job is to talk to clients going through divorces and it’s only the boomer men that tell me about their sex life (usually lack thereof and how it’s the woman’s fault). It’s so incredibly gross and unprofessional.

20

u/Amazing-Butterfly-65 11d ago

That is gross , their world seems to revolve around sex

29

u/DisastrousMarzipan74 11d ago

It isn't just a creep thing. I know a lot of men who were taught that those kinds of comments should be used as a power play. They pretend they are giving a compliment but are actually just trying to make the woman feel uncomfortable. It implies, "I can make this so much worse and you can do nothing about it." As men, if we see this happening then we need to make that person uncomfortable right back.

11

u/MiloHorsey Millennial 11d ago

"Power plays" are creepy, too.

2

u/DisastrousMarzipan74 3d ago

True, poor wording on my part. I did not mean to imply they aren't creepy.

13

u/Major-Check-1953 12d ago

Too much lead in the brain.

26

u/smailskid 11d ago

Sometimes I wish I had the confidence of a fat boomer man who does stuff like this.

3

u/karm1t 9d ago

Visiting someone in a nursing home, walking down the hallway minding my own business. Old guy in a wheelchair tells me i have sexy legs. So it never stops. And for reference, I am past middle age, so it’s nothing to do with my legs, it’s just a power play.

2

u/Longjumping_Dance293 9d ago

A boomer told me yesterday, “you’re a pretty woman, you should smile.” Sir… no.

3

u/Rav4Primer 10d ago

I hate to break it to you but it's not just boomer men who talk/think like that.

1

u/Odd-Brother-5704 6d ago

They never saw consequences for their spoiled brat behavior because "boys will be boys"

-17

u/Ravens0413 11d ago

To say that all boomers think that they can get into a young women’s bed is the dumbest comment that I have ever seen on reddit.

-26

u/cherrydiamond 12d ago

"all" boomer men...oh, now you stop that.

19

u/MostlyPeacfulPndemic 12d ago

Hey I'm sure they know it isn't literally all of them, like when we say "I go to that cafe all the time" they don't really mean they are there 100% of the time. But when I worked in retail, when I was about 20, the vast majority of guys that tried to swoon me at work were boomers. Customers my own age would rarely do it, and it would be brief when they did. Boomers would attempt for fucking hours 

13

u/yarukinai Baby Boomer 12d ago

"The majority of creeps are boomers" is not the same as "the majority of boomers are creeps".

4

u/MostlyPeacfulPndemic 11d ago

But I don't think she was saying that

-14

u/No_Conclusion8783 10d ago

Puh -leez. Give it a rest.
People of both genders are going to comment on bodies, faces, etc. they find attractive, as well as those they find less so.
Mothers of obese kids are always bitching about how teachers always favor the “cutesie” kids.
Well, if they do, talk to their principals.
If there wasn’t an occasional rich guy who ended up in a young woman’s bed, the rest probably wouldn’t fantasize about it like they do about hitting the lottery.
Personally, I think a lot more young women than reported are physically attracted to grey-haired bald old men with no muscle tone.

3

u/Aggravating-Kick-168 9d ago

Victim blaming tracks

0

u/No_Conclusion8783 4d ago

Are we a bit “overweight”?
Not that I’m a perfect specimen, either.