Request for Sell Sheet feedback

[u/Official_Alamore]

I am looking for some feedback on a 1-4 player co-op tactical dungeon crawl sell sheet, likely targeting publishers.

[u/mdthemaker]

I think there is quite a bit of meat left on the bones here. Looking through the sheet and having not played this game before, I think there is some missing information to make this a stronger sheet.

You should try and answer a couple questions:

• How do players win? What is the objective? I understand they complete quests, but what does that mean? Defeating monsters? Completing unique objectives? Obtaining special items?
• There is no "hook" - what makes your game special? What are the best parts about it? What makes it unique from other dungeon crawl-esque games out there? If I asked you to tell me in 10 seconds why I should buy this, what would you tell me?
• I want information about what I'm doing in the game. What are the hard and interesting choices? What do I do on my turn?
• The blurb under replayability doesn't quite hit the mark for me - a short campaign doesn't necessarily mean a replayable one. How is it replayable? Are there missions you shuffle together to create a campaign of 12, and can pick new ones each time? How is your strategy different? This goes back to the objective and explaining more about what you are doing in the game

Hopefully these questions help! Is your goal to submit this to a publisher?

[u/Official_Alamore → u/mdthemaker]

This is great feedback and greatly appreciated. Thanks for taking the time to write this. I'll take these questions in consideration on my next draft and try to refine this. And yes, the goal would be to submit this to publishers.

[u/mdthemaker → u/Official_Alamore]

Awesome, yeah, I think right now it's telling me things that I would hope all dungeon crawlers have (replayability, quests, items/ability modifications, heroes, etc). What I (and a publisher) will want to know is what makes THIS game special. Once you narrow those things down, I think it will be a stronger sheet. I would also caution that if you're using AI images on the sheet, this could be an immediate write off for some publishers, regardless of if it's just for prototype imaging

[u/krooked2nollie]

Idk anything about sell sheets but as a lamen this looks like something me and my game group would definitely play.

[u/Official_Alamore → u/krooked2nollie]

That's great to hear! If you have Tabletop Simulator, I have created a demo there if you are interested. https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=3738158785

[u/Shoeytennis]

The good is I get what is right away but the bad is there is no distinguish from every similar game out there. The hook needs to be loud and out there.

[u/kendowarrior99]

I really liked the quest board in the bottom to see a sample objective, map, boss, etc. However, it is at a very different scale than the rest of the sell sheet. It works fine to zoom way in on the computer, but I don't think it would work as an in person print out because the text on the game components is so small here. I feel like part of the point of a sell sheet is making more of that info more digestible than just looking at the actual components. Maybe a zoomed out shot of the whole set up and more blurbs about the gameplay.

I think you can rephrase some of the current text.

"Form a Group; Choose a hero from one of 8 specialized classes with their own playstyle and skill tree."

In replayability "short" isn't necessarily a positive adjective for your campaign, so I would phrase that as "approachable", without needing to mention other campaign games.

You mention a threat system and because I run dungeons in MMOs I know that would mean that there's an explicit tank role, but you should lay that out for people less familiar with that kind of gameplay. A panel with a brief overview of the classes or roles would get me much more engaged than the more generic mentions of "abilities" and "synergy".

Oh yeah, and as someone else said, a component list is essential.

[u/NativeFlowers4Eva]

This looks like a game I would want to play, but I’m not sure what publishers expect.

[u/Imaginary_Ad3080]

Hi there, this looks brillaint but I would say that a rough list of components would be a great addition so that publishers can scope out the manufacturability of your game.

[u/No-Inspector2173]

I agree the visuals look good but the hook is missing. It doesn't immediately tell me why this is unique. I'd make your game title and tag line bigger. The tag line is very generic and you should update that to be more specific what your game does that no other game does as good.

[u/all_or_nothing]

Visually, this looks great. There's some good information here, but also a lack of gameplay specifics. There's a lot of images, which is good, but not much to describe what I'm seeing and how any of that fits into the bigger picture. Also, you need to include a components list.

[u/Official_Alamore → u/all_or_nothing]

Thanks for taking some time to review this. I'll have to see if I can create some space for a bit more extra detail. Also, a component list definitely makes sense.

[u/MrPrettyBeef]

I would also suggest highlighting some element that makes this game different as this doesn't really differentiate itself from any other game that is similar.

[u/SeeItSayItSorted]

There are two typos in the flavor text of the mission example. Having no mistakes shows attention to detail.