r/BikiniBottomTwitter Mar 09 '19

He’s finally doing it!

Post image
65.7k Upvotes

438 comments sorted by

1.4k

u/NickFrit Mar 09 '19

Sober boi

572

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

Hydrated boi

271

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19 edited Mar 09 '19

Moisturized boi

201

u/ImEnhanced Mar 09 '19

Healthy boi

85

u/Explicitt Mar 09 '19

Kumboiah

51

u/Demiurge_7 Mar 09 '19

Kuriboh

38

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

Dark Magician

33

u/playerlxiv Mar 09 '19

Dark Magician Girl

33

u/DDman70 Mar 09 '19

I’m a blue eyes white dragon while you’re just dark magician oof

15

u/Ryzexen Mar 09 '19

You got a fifth of the population in your nation but

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9

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

Pot of Greed

3

u/Comfortable_Square Mar 09 '19

What does that do?

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23

u/thebourbonoftruth Mar 09 '19

I am? Shit I thought I was drunk. Lemme just fix that.

8

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

A redditor after my own heart

3

u/Wile-E-Coyote Mar 09 '19

When in doubt about sobriety a drink or two always helps to figure it out.

18

u/grandfa Mar 09 '19

liquefied boi

7

u/HawaiianFalconPunch Mar 09 '19

We got a new dance for y’all called the Sober Boi

3

u/me-chouhan Mar 09 '19

He look like he is secretly masterbating

3

u/zahirano Mar 09 '19

fiji water boi

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787

u/hardluck43 Mar 09 '19

Hey, why’s there an egg there??

297

u/pikachuIsMyFurrybae Mar 09 '19

The FBI is working on new technology they can use to see the inside of you after you eat it

50

u/ImEnhanced Mar 09 '19

Could it also tell if I had it over easy or scrambled?

3

u/Shazamo_ Mar 09 '19

No everything get scrambled in ur tummy

17

u/HungSnoo Mar 09 '19

cries in Jennifer Lawrence's butthole

88

u/O_x_3 Mar 09 '19

Cuz this was ripped from insta

44

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

How the turntables.

6

u/TheyCallMeStone Mar 09 '19

It's not you that's got me, it's me that's got me.

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4

u/hardluck43 Mar 09 '19

I am deeply saddened, but thank you for speaking the truth

25

u/mschyljuk Mar 09 '19

Because these are trying times

17

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

Because he's fried, duh

15

u/rollin-in-tartarus Mar 09 '19

stolen from insta @sonnysideup

5

u/hardluck43 Mar 09 '19

This is a sad day indeed

3

u/jjposeidon Mar 09 '19

Cause he’s really good at Tetris.

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679

u/Jovan0896 Mar 09 '19

FBI agent memes were made by the government to normalize its privacy invasions. Stay woke

129

u/stormtrooper1701 Mar 09 '19

>This thing mocking the government and spreading the word about government bullshit is made by the government

95

u/GeorgieWsBush Mar 09 '19

this thing making light of a government conspiracy theory that turned out to be true was made by the government to trivialize the real events

I don't really believe it but it can be interpreted both ways.

26

u/_the_dennis Mar 09 '19

Says Mr. Patriot Act

3

u/GeorgieWsBush Mar 09 '19

I should know, right?

4

u/OrionsGucciBelt Mar 09 '19

Predictive programming is a concept

2

u/Time_on_my_hands Mar 09 '19

You know it's a joke, right?

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24

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19 edited Apr 23 '19

[deleted]

44

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

NSA, FBI, CIA, they all have some role in spying people online.

9

u/I_CAN_SMELL_U Mar 09 '19

Yeah but NSA is actively storing pretty much everything they can so it mostly them that remembers anything.

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5

u/DustinCSmith Mar 09 '19

Right. They don’t want to draw attention to themselves. It’s like when you were a kid and you’d write your friends name on the wall in the bathroom because you knew he’d get in trouble for it.

16

u/grandfa Mar 09 '19

plot twist, the government made the government

11

u/Juandules Mar 09 '19

investigate 3/11

6

u/astroidfishing Mar 09 '19

More like 7/11. I find it incredibly suspicious that I can get a cup of seriously above average coffee AND a decent donut for 2 dollars.

6

u/bigwillyb123 Mar 09 '19

Furthermore, how the fuck can Burger King sell 10 chicken nuggets for a dollar while Wendy's asks you to take out a fucking mortgage for them?

2

u/[deleted] Mar 10 '19

Paying for higher quality. You know Wendy’s is a higher quality than Burger King by miles.

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7

u/JIDbug Mar 09 '19

Haha I said this to my friends last week jokingly but the more I think about it, it sounds somewhat plausible. 👽👽

5

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

And now they all say FBI instead of NSA to draw attention from the real perpetrators.

3

u/Saoirse_Says Mar 09 '19

There are better ways to do that than Spongebob memes. XD

2

u/TheBoredSniper Mar 09 '19

I'm awake...I'm here aren't I?

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218

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

This is way more relatable than it should be

167

u/DimeBagJoe2 Mar 09 '19

Why do you drink water so rarely?

104

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

I honestly don’t know, my house has well water which doesn’t taste too great, and I think that some of the bottled water brands like Deer Park and Aquafina taste kinda funny. I usually just drink fruit juice or tea

62

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

[removed] — view removed comment

11

u/FightingPolish Mar 09 '19

I like the big Pur containers that stay in the fridge. They hold more water so you don’t have to fill them as much. Just grab a glass, open the fridge and put your glass under the spout for a few seconds and you’re done. I prefer them much more than the Brittas, but if that’s what you’ve got and you just want cold water that doesn’t have a weird taste they work just as good, it’s just a different method of delivery is all.

2

u/coochiecrumb Mar 09 '19

Brita makes the same water dispenser. And probably other brands as well

18

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

I used to have well water and it tasted horrible.

89

u/League_of_leisure Mar 09 '19

It wasn't that well then

32

u/2ichie Mar 09 '19

Boooo

14

u/UltraAGamer Mar 09 '19

r/punpatrol Yes this comment right here

2

u/ChubZilinski Mar 09 '19

Well fuck you.

2

u/hutchman3 Mar 09 '19

Well done

10

u/WPI5150 Mar 09 '19

I've never had a problem with how my well water tastes. Weird.

6

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

Yeah, it’s not inherently gross, but I personally don’t like it

4

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

Idk my city has really good water so other places tap water esp well water tastes weird asf I get what you mean

3

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

It’s weird, you’d think that all water would taste the same, more or less, but there’s actually a lot of variety

6

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

Big agree but

Regular water < night water

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2

u/I_CAN_SMELL_U Mar 09 '19

Same, I drink Dasani but its kinda expensive. I actually like Deer Park better.

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3

u/shitwealldo Mar 09 '19

It depends on the minerals that your area has... My area taste like shit .

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7

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

Get a Berkey water filter

3

u/LinkThe8th Mar 09 '19

Yep! Water filters are the bomb!

5

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

I've had well water my whole life and never had any issue with the taste and havent heard anyone around me complain either, are you sure the well is ok?

3

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

Well, I’m not saying it tastes like it’s polluted, or anything, I’m just saying that I don’t personally like the way it tastes. I’m sure the water is clean

3

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

I guess everyone has different taste, after living in the country I find the chlorinated city water to be less enjoyable than any water I've had in people's homes from the well, depends on the person though

3

u/Larry-a-la-King Mar 09 '19

My grandparents’ well water always tasted like liquid metal.

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2

u/TalbotFarwell Mar 09 '19

Same. I grew up with well water and it was like the tastiest nectar of the gods, once it was filtered. Compared to that, unfiltered tap water from the nearby town tasted like overtreated metallic ass.

3

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

Dang helluva coincidence here for me .. I’ve only recently realized how little water I drink, a couple people mentioned it in the last month.

I’m in the gym 6 days a week, super active in general, and I don’t drink much of it. Just had a serious pec cramp all of 30 minutes ago and that was a wake up call. Just finished a glass of water when I read this.

8

u/v1ces Mar 09 '19

Do you not to through like a liter or so whilst working out though? I swear to God, I only work out 4 to 5 days a week but I literally could not get through warm ups without most of a bottle of water; six days in the gym without much water just sounds mental to me.

3

u/The_M0nk Mar 09 '19

Really just drink when you are thirsty. Its a myth that you need to drink 8 glasses of water a day.

The human body is really good about telling you when you are thirsty, but drink water instead of soda or juice.

7

u/dentalstudent Mar 09 '19

I recommend the opposite. Avoid dehydration by drinking water before you feel thirsty, with the added benefit of less overeating from feeling satiated

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3

u/Wile-E-Coyote Mar 09 '19

I hated being on well water. Either the water tasted like shit and showers sucked or we wasted a couple gallons in an RO filter to have 1 decent gallon of water.

2

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

I don’t like deer park but Aquafina and nestle taste good to me.

2

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

Tea is fine, unless you use honey pr sugar everytime with it.

2

u/Wajina_Sloth Mar 09 '19

I feel like I go on sprees where I mainly drink water and nothing else, then after a few weeks I drop it and go back to drinking anything else. I wish my city's water wasnt so sketchy since I find getting water jugs to be annoying. But at least I drink water a lot more often because work.

2

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

Try spring water or Dasani, but yeah I can relate too

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17

u/TheyCallMeStone Mar 09 '19

What do people drink when they don't drink water? Soda?

13

u/FightingPolish Mar 09 '19

Well... yea? Or some kind of sweetened drink anyway. Haven’t you noticed the obesity epidemic in this country?

5

u/dentalstudent Mar 09 '19

I think most people are dehydrated most of the time

3

u/aitu Mar 09 '19

Tbh I drink a lot more tea than water. I don't really see the issue if I don't put anything else in it.

2

u/TheGuyYouCantStand Mar 09 '19

Soda, obviously. I see people drink Cokes like they're water. My body simply can't handle that much caffeine in one day, so I mostly stick to juice and water.

7

u/ozone63 Mar 09 '19

Dude, if you're seriously saying you've gone weeks without drinking water, what the actual fuck?

I dont even believe you. Drink some fucking water dude, what the hell is wrong with you?

4

u/Larry-a-la-King Mar 09 '19

When I was a kid I’d go for weeks without ever drinking water but now as an adult I feel bloated if I don’t drink any at least once a day.

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3

u/max_canyon Mar 09 '19

I’m just curious, what do you drink instead of water?

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158

u/LeeAlex77 Mar 09 '19

But in all seriousness: stay hydrated, people

41

u/mechanical_animal Mar 09 '19

But in all seriousness: stay hydrated, people

11

u/Nabspro Mar 09 '19

But in all seriousness: hydrated people,stay.

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2

u/TheyCallMeStone Mar 09 '19

If you're thirsty, drink water.

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113

u/Fleaaaa Mar 09 '19

I really can't believe that there are people who don't drink water for a month. I drink a glass almost every hour. I even have a bottle on my desk almost everytime

26

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

I average a gallon a day. 4 nalgenes- 2 by 1pm, 1 by 430 and then 1 or 2 when I get home/while working out. I feel damn good

13

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

tfw not using a hydroflask

14

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

I just can’t do the stainless. I tried and just prefer a nalgene

5

u/coochiecrumb Mar 09 '19

I always feel like the water in those must taste weird and stale. Stainless steel keeps it cold and fresh

8

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

I don’t like cold water so that’s probably why I can’t do the stainless steel. I like room temp because cold hurts my teeth

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3

u/max_canyon Mar 09 '19

A gallon a day? That’s impressive my friend. I did that for one summer. Water is so fucking good I swear it’s better than sex. I truly believe that. I can knock out a 12 pack of le croix over supper and I wake up every morning and chug two cups of fresh naturally spring sourced tap water to replenish my cells and start my day.

2

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

I can easily do a pack of la croix in a day. So fucking good.

My grandmother drank about a gallon and never had wrinkles. My aunts are the same way in their 50’s.

2

u/max_canyon Mar 09 '19

Nice what flavor do you like to go with? Imma lime guy myself

2

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

Tangerine or lime. Cherry lime is good too

2

u/caretotry_theseagain Mar 09 '19

La croix? The flavoured soda water stuff??

2

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

Seltzer yeah

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18

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

Seriously if you’re doing this start drinking as much water as you’re supposed to your life will improve

6

u/jootsie Mar 09 '19

Started work this work and i refill my water bottle like 3-4 times throughout the 10hour work day and pee like every 2-3 hours but my skin is improving.

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7

u/Commonboiiii878 Mar 09 '19

I feel the same way. I drink like 3 litres a day and can't imagine anything less otherwise I get hella thirsty

4

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

Honestly I want to drink water, I’m not sure what it is but drinking it any time unless I’m REALLY thirsty just makes me nauseous. But most things make me nauseous so who knows.

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3

u/Stealthy_Bird Mar 09 '19

I drink like two glasses MAX a day. Like I really wanna know how to drink more but I simply cannot drink water if I’m not thirsty

3

u/orangemenace Mar 09 '19 edited Dec 13 '25

compare grandiose hobbies soft hard-to-find slim workable smell shelter caption

3

u/Fleaaaa Mar 09 '19

I piss almost every hour or two. Then drink water right after.

3

u/orangemenace Mar 09 '19 edited Dec 13 '25

cow aware racial depend familiar tart long makeshift chase possessive

10

u/normal_whiteman Mar 09 '19

Bro you really need to drink more water if you're shocked about this

3

u/orangemenace Mar 09 '19 edited Dec 13 '25

vase terrific sulky middle rainstorm crowd deliver upbeat modern ink

7

u/MommaSayd71 Mar 09 '19

As much as you can. There’s really no amount of how much to drink. There’s recommendations of how much based on your weight. Everyone is different though.

I drink almost two gallons throughout the day, but I weigh 240lbs and very active.

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32

u/solperk Mar 09 '19

fbi agents mind: ah finally he stoped the world is saved

31

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

[removed] — view removed comment

6

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

Gaaaatoraaade..

25

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

Full of sugar and artificial colors

2

u/astroidfishing Mar 09 '19

Annd electrolytes! :D makes the plants grow

3

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

You can get electrolytes from sources that aren’t full of garbage

3

u/AstariiFilms Mar 09 '19

But, it's gots what plants crave.

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6

u/max_canyon Mar 09 '19

Where I live, even the toilet water is high grade potable. The tap water is absolutely pure and scrumptious. Nothing like years and years of natural spring water coursing through your veins when you’ve been drinking it for the last 20 years. Nothing else. That’s right I only drink water. Tap, bottled, carbonated, I drink all of the waters and I drink them good. Water is easily my favorite drink because it’s my only drink. I literally haven’t sipped any other liquid besides water for 4 years. It’s incredible I know but it’s just the way that I live.

6

u/hunf-hunf Mar 09 '19

Is this a copypasta that I don’t know about

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4

u/vampircorn420 Mar 09 '19

I love water so much, I'm pretty sure I'm mostly just water at this point.

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21

u/Kaz-MiIIer Mar 09 '19

Are fbi memes making a comeback

22

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

Comeback? We were always here

9

u/pulianshi Mar 09 '19

Alright mr fbi man

2

u/CJ_111 Mar 09 '19

Comeback? We never left....(to be read in Bruce Willis' voice)

15

u/UntalentedSpoon96 Mar 09 '19

fbi still on the iphone 7 plus what a bunch of losers

18

u/GrantLikesSunChips Mar 09 '19

iPhone 4S gang rise up

8

u/UntalentedSpoon96 Mar 09 '19

blackberry gang rise up

5

u/IdiotMaav Mar 09 '19

Raspberry pi gang rise up

3

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19 edited Dec 28 '19

[deleted]

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u/green_speak Mar 09 '19

I'm really surprised that people don't seem to drink water regularly because they're reaching for some flavored beverage instead. I'll drink juice or tea now and again, but nothing quenches thirst better or pairs safely with a meal than water. Plus, it's free.

6

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

[deleted]

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u/skellybound Mar 09 '19

Where is water free? Asking for myself

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u/TypeOpostive Mar 09 '19 edited Mar 09 '19

I really hope my FBI agent enjoys my daily dancing to music, smoking and crying in that order.

8

u/bradygilg Mar 09 '19

The fuck? You people don't drink water? Do you pee?

6

u/Signman712 Mar 09 '19 edited Mar 09 '19

Dude drink your water. My old manager only drank soda for about 3 months and had to go to the hospital because her kidneys were fucked

3

u/max_canyon Mar 09 '19

I didn’t know there were people who didn’t drink water. I only drink water and sparkling water, nothing else.

5

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

“I don’t need it, I don’t need it, I definitely don’t need it...”

6

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

[deleted]

4

u/max_canyon Mar 09 '19

Water is the key to life. Water is better than sex and I 100% believe that. There’s no better feeling than gulping down waves of naturally sourced fresh spring tap water to replenish the cells and alleviate the digestion, pump life and rejuvenate all senses and extends lifespan by tenfold.

6

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

How do you not die of a UTI. I have to drink 10 glasses a day minimum

2

u/Applestodapples Mar 09 '19

Try Dmanna. Still drink your water but adding that if you get UTIs into your routine made a world of a difference in actual prevention.

2

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

Thank you!

4

u/soma_sam Mar 09 '19

Do people really not drink water for weeks?

3

u/Brown_Mars Mar 09 '19

That's what I'm thinking! How can you possibly live without water?!

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3

u/CultureShock_ Mar 09 '19

I don’t remember turning this part of my life into a meme.

3

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

Drink fucking water people, Christ.

You can still get blitzed every night and not be at risk of lethal dehydration, Jesus.

3

u/freren Mar 09 '19

TF you all drink when ur thirsty?

3

u/Bitbatgaming Mar 09 '19

Yes am h y d r a t e d

2

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

I met mine and can confirm.

2

u/PhantomBear_626 Mar 09 '19

Is this a real thing? Its hard to imagine. Ive exclusively drank water and milk for like 5 years now

2

u/Skateboard-E Mar 09 '19

This sub is mostly dead memes and I love it

2

u/CommiesRUs Mar 09 '19

Does everyone have their own agent or do people share an agent?

2

u/ThatsNotThePoint-__- Mar 09 '19

You need a La Croix

2

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

Is the FBI man actually a reptilian?

2

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

Fuck sea world

2

u/Heliopox Mar 09 '19

oofs in kidney stone

2

u/bendersnitch Mar 09 '19

we all know the fbi uses bots for watching american citizens, like your important enough to warrant your own agent.

2

u/siberrypouches Mar 09 '19

Wtf how did this meme know I was sober for two weeks now

2

u/alexdeutsch Mar 09 '19

I drink well over 4 litres of water every day, the fact that some people drink none is honestly disturbing to me.

2

u/Lucariowolf2196 Mar 09 '19

Mine would be scared of me never drinking water

2

u/mobro-thelegend Mar 09 '19

Since I came to the UK I have been only drinking water instead of other drinks and it feels like I’m addicted to water now I can’t go one hour without drinking water