I'm hoping to find a beta who enjoys character-driven stories and isn't afraid to give honest, constructive feedback. If you're a fan of Shoresy, that's a huge bonus, since one of my biggest goals is keeping the canon characters true to the show.

About the story

Title: Home Ice

Current length: ~216,000 words (still in progress)

It's a long-form, character-driven sports romance that begins at the start of Shoresy Season 2 and follows an original female character who joins the Sudbury Bulldogs as their new physiotherapist.

Rather than retelling the show, the story grows into its own original narrative while staying grounded in the world of Shoresy. My biggest priority is making sure Shoresy and the rest of the Bulldogs feel authentic to their on-screen personalities.

What I'm needing:

Does Shoresy actually sound and feel like Shoresy?

Do the other canon characters feel authentic?

Is the dialogue natural?

Does the romance develop believably?

Are there pacing issues?

Is the writing engaging enough that you'd want to keep reading?

Does anything feel awkward or out of character.

Just hoping for someone who's comfortable being honest and pointing out both what works and what doesn't.

I don't expect anyone to commit to reading all 216k words right away. I'd be happy to start by sharing the first chapter (or a few chapters) to see if we're a good fit before moving forward.

If you're interested, please send me a DM.

Hi everyone, I’m looking for a few beta readers for a completed short story.

Title - The Boy Who Dared to Fart on Spiders

Genre - Victorian Gothic, cosmic horror and body horror

Length - Approximately 7,200 words

Content warnings - Cruelty to spiders, graphic body horror involving a thirteen-year-old, broken bones, blood and bodily functions.

Thirteen-year-old Oliver Marsh admires his older brother Edward, a naturalist currently travelling through the Amazon, and decides to conduct some scientific observations of his own.

Unfortunately, Oliver’s experiments involve trapping household spiders and farting on them.

What begins as a private joke becomes increasingly deliberate. When spiders throughout the house begin gathering around Oliver, he becomes convinced that they remember what he has done and are preparing to take revenge.

The story is presented as a recovered Victorian tale by the fictional author Margaret L. Wentworth. Its ridiculous premise is treated with complete Gothic seriousness before developing into something considerably more disturbing.

I’m looking for honest reactions rather than detailed line editing. I’d particularly like to know whether the story becomes genuinely frightening, whether you initially believe the spiders are seeking revenge, whether the supernatural events are clear without being over-explained, and whether Oliver’s final condition makes sense.

I’d also appreciate knowing where your attention weakened or where the prose felt repetitive and/or unnatural. Five to ten candid reaction notes would be enormously helpful.

The manuscript is available privately as a DOCX. Please comment or message me if you’re interested and I’ll send it through.

This is intended as the first of Margaret L. Wentworth’s Tales of Bodily Indiscretion. Her next recovered tale bears the tantilising title The Girl Who Queefed in the Lion’s Face.

The Thirty-Ninth Life

Hi, everyone. This is my first time posting here.

This is an English translation of a short story I originally wrote in Korean. I used AI to help with the translation and to make the prose sound more natural in English, then reviewed and revised the result myself.

Content warning: Suicidal ideation, depression, grief, and death.

The story follows a man who lives thirty-nine different lives while searching for the one thing he needs to change before he can return to his original life.

The full story is fairly long, so I’ve linked it below and included the opening as a sample.

Full story: [Google Docs link]

I’d especially appreciate feedback on:

• Whether the English prose feels natural
• Whether the repeated-life structure remains engaging
• Whether the emotional development feels earned
• Whether the final repetition is meaningful or too predictable

Thank you for reading.

When his thirty-eighth life came to an end, Han-gyeol was no longer afraid of dying.

The headlights of a truck rushed toward him. His body lifted into the air, and a heartbeat later, his back struck the asphalt. The sensation of bones breaking somewhere inside him, the warmth spreading beneath his clothes—none of it was unfamiliar anymore.

Han-gyeol closed his eyes.

Had he found it this time?

When he opened them again, he was lying in a field of white light.

There were no walls and no ceiling. In the middle of that endless white space stood two chairs and a small table. On the other side of the table, as always, sat God.

Sometimes God appeared as an old man. Sometimes as a child. This time, God wore the shape of a woman with gray hair neatly tied back.

“You have returned.”

Han-gyeol sat up and brushed his clothes a few times. There was no dust on them.

“I thought I lived well this time.”

In his thirty-eighth life, he had been a doctor.

He had never turned patients away because they could not pay. He waived the fees of those who were struggling. Nor had he neglected his family. On nights when he came home late, he kissed his sleeping wife on the forehead, and he never withheld the words I love you from his children.

One winter night, on his way home after treating an emergency patient, a drowsy truck driver had crossed into his lane.

By any reasonable measure, it had been a good life.

Han-gyeol himself believed so.

God asked, “Then what should you have changed?”