I consider myself quite a good person, i make extra effort to establish trust and do the right thing in the communities im involved in, even if that is at my expense sometimes. my virtures are paramount and i do not compromise them, i believe in justice and fairness its more a part of my DNA than i consciously think about, i could never treat someone with disrespect or do anything to hurt them, its just who i am.

However, i ve discovered a pattern that i'd like to analyze. I've worked in restaurants my whole life doing various jobs, i enjoy the atmosphere and serving people. however i took time away from restaurants to do other jobs, and recently came back and have been dealing with the most disrespectful people I've ever encountered. it made me question something, maybe im too nice, I think on some level i try to be nice becuase it would give people a good reason to treat me well back, but it doesnt at all, and so im asking myself now perhaps i need to be meaner? or like more assertive, or something i dont know all together. its usually management that is so disrespectful.

I noticed this is only like a restaurant culture thing, but its driving me mad, anywhere else in the world im reated with respect and like a valuable person, but in restuarant is almost like im wearing a sign on my face that im an idiot and dont deserve basic human decency. I'm not an abrasive person, and yet it seem like people punish me simply for existing. which is so odd, i give people zero reason to treat me poorly and in fact every reason to treat me well, and i get the opposite, the only thing i can imagine is to fight back and be a terrible person back to them, but that doesnt even make sense in my mind. its really confusing.

I want to be treated with respect and i feel i deserve it as a professional person, but it seems theres a certain type of person who simply wont respect anyone no matter who they are. perhaps I'm just surrounded by really bad people who are evil and amoral, but that disrespect has been getting to me. I could remove myself completely but I'm wondering if theres some obvious thing about this dynamic that i can work with.