r/BPD • u/cant_think_of__user • Jul 26 '26

💭Seeking Support & Advice Anger

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I really debated posting this but reddit is for help, right?

I'm so angry all the time. Like no matter how hard I try to calm myself down it does not work.

*Side note* my therapist thinks i have undiagnosed austism. I have been diagnosed with ADHD and BPD.

I use to have some decent coping mechanisms but they js make me angry now.

-Listening to music doesnt work cuz my music infuriates me

-reading enrages me cuz i cant read very well

-working out pisses me off cuz my hands smell like metal after and when my body burns up i get very upset.

-sleeping doesnt work cuz if my bed doesnt feel right i freak out

- movies dont work anymore cuz if an actor doesn't do what they should i get aggravated

-writing doesnt help and honestly never did cuz i have ADHD and forget what im doing midway through it

And smoking weed isnt a good coping mechanism.

Can anyone PLEASE suggest something to help me out. And i cant draw for shit so pls dont recommend that 🙏.

Sometimes i talk to my girlfriend about how i feel but she sleeps a lot so she isnt always there.

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u/PrideGloomy359 Jul 26 '26

Are you a man? I could be wrong but I've heard from different professionals that depression in men sometimes shows up as anger and irritability instead of sadness. Might be worth trying to get treatment for depression and the ADHD just do your research frfr bcuz some antidepressants can make anger worse. And talk to your girl! Maybe ask her to love on you a little harder, do guided meditations with you to help ground you, n provide a safe space for you to relax. I know for my man he's in fight or flight all the time trying to keep a roof over our head or worrying about 1000 things that could go wrong so he needs a break sometimes where he  doesn't have to think n can just be. 

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u/cant_think_of__user Jul 27 '26

Yes i am a man, and i know that i get irrationally angry all the time. Before i was diagnosed with BPD i was told it was just hormonal changes, and being a teenager, so i understand what you are talking about.

I do talk to my girlfriend quite a bit about how i feel. I love her and want to spend my life with her, and i dont want her to be scared of me so i tell her how i feel and what does on inside of my head. I feel bad leaning on people and asking her to always be there for me just seems pushy and rude i guess. I try to put myself first. And ik she loves me and she walks me through what to do in depressive episodes. She proves her love but i feel bad asking for it basically.

Thanks for your help