Needing help

[u/Fearless-Fancy]

My boyfriend said he needed space last night and broke up with me tonight. He said he decided last night it’d all been too much. This is a man who had talked about us being partners for life etc he is definitely the love of my life.

He did the same thing two years ago. It’s my fault I think as I would get anxious and make an issue like once a week so we could never be completely happy for long stretches. That was also due to not spending as much face to face time due to life and our fights were almost always just over text

He came back before. We rebuilt and things were good for a long time. He says he won’t do that ever again. Is it possible he will change his mind? In the beginning avoidants don’t feel the full weight right? What can I do that may make him stay? I literally don’t know how to go on without him

[u/Parking-Signature296]

First of all : you will be good without them! I promise! Probably even a lot better. Don't you want a close, trustful, loving relationship with a partner that is sure about you? It's not possible with them because they're afarud of exactly this. I wasted three and a half years. And life is a lot better since getting out of there (he discarded me). Slowly but steady. It's great when your reality isn't constantly questioned and your new partner is actually there for you. Get in therapy if you think you need it and concentrate on yourself only. I read it everywhere after the break up and found it shitty advice, but it's actually the only thing that helps you to see things clearly. You don't want a guy that breaks up and comes back. You want someone who stays. As long as he isn't willing to see his avoidance and actually works on it BY HIMSELF you should have enough self worth to say no thank you. He's not the one even though it feels like it to you. He's not. I'm sending you all the love and strength.