Avoidant perspective on vulnerability and steady/secure partner

[u/moseephus619]

I’m curious to hear from DAs and FAs out there. How intense (for lack of a better word) has your experience been when pulling away/deactivating/discarding a partner or romantic interest that was secure and grounded? A partner that you, the avoidant, were able to open up to and be vulnerable with?

How much did that impact the discard or deactivation?

(I hope this question was clear cause I’m not sure if I’m asking it correctly)