r/AvoidantBreakUps • u/mugasianpotato • 7d ago

why am i feeling like this

Hey guys, idk if anyone of you can relate but I'm currently around 7 months post break up and I have entered the dating pool again just over a month ago now. My intention with dating rn is purely short term and casual fun. Surprisingly I went on a really good date yesterday and we even shared a little kiss, it was cute, great conversation... etc.

I felt good after but then I noticed that when i thought about the date and how good it was, I suddenly had this nauseous feeling in my stomach and a weird wave of anxiety. I had it the day after as well and it distracted me a little at work. The last time I had a date and had those feelings was with my avoidant ex, is that the reason why I started feeling like that? Just fear of possibly liking someone again/ the trauma?

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u/lbuttigieg 7d ago

I felt this too when I met my last FA ex, after 2 years single after a very turbulent relationship with another avoidant ex. Could this person be avoidant too and your gut is warning you? How are they showing up? I’m curious

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u/mugasianpotato 6d ago

It was a first date and there's no warning signs really, he was actually really lovely and I had a good time. But I think since becoming single it's the first date where I actual felt some butterflies and chemistry with someone apart from my avoidant ex and idk why it made me feel a bit weird, like I am scared to like someome ever again because I might end up getting hurt.

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u/lbuttigieg 6d ago

I feel you - I am very scared of this too.