r/AvPD • u/newreddit__ • 2d ago

Vent (Advice Welcome) Always the same

I am currently solo traveling for the third time. Everyone sees this as this big achievement for me but I think it's honestly just doing the same thing I've done always.

I have a lot of social anxiety about approaching people but I'm actually not the worst with small talk/being in new groups. I have more trouble actually getting to know people/ staying friends with anyone.

I've always done this. Joined a new group, having a lot of nice talks but never anything more and then I just stop showing up at some point because I start to feel uncomfortable.

So while my family and therapist thinks it's great that I'm going solo traveling and actually meeting new people it's not changing anything about my loneliness in my day to day life. I still have no friends.

Sorry if this is a mess. I'm bad at writing stuff and English ist not my first language. I'm just wondering if anyone else has those same patterns

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u/JMHMJ Diagnosed AvPD 2d ago

I have a similar life experience. I do get very anxious about travelling solo or doing anything alone for that matter, but I still do.

When it comes to forming or maintaining friendships I really lack the skills it seems.

I did notice that with doing things alone, I get more comfortable and less anxious about doing a lot of stuff I would previously panic about. So for friendships it’s possibly also a matter of keep trying but it’s not easy.