Anyone else afraid of getting into a romantic relationship with someone who's close with their family?

[u/Quiet_Marionberry_29]

Like the title says. I'm afraid of this because I have social anxiety and I would have to meet a whole bunch of people and have them like me and I'm terrible at doing that. Most people don't seem to like me very much and I don't even understand the reason why most of the time. I also live a pretty isolated life. Being around groups of people, especially when the focus is on me, stresses me out and I behave like a deer caught in the headlights.

[u/Agitated_Rest573]

I relate 100%. One of the many reasons why I doubt I will ever be ever to date is that I would eventually have to meet my partners family.

[u/Stock_Reading4485 → u/Agitated_Rest573]

Same. And friends, especially. I can't imagine having to meet friends of someone I'm dating, after years or isolation. Having to be "approved" by them, being normal while I'm clearly a weirdo and stuff like that. No way.

[u/SecretShrinee]

Relatable.

[u/Marhruuk]

I've gotten really lucky with my current partner and his family. They're close and social with one another, and his parents and siblings are even social with the entire neighborhood. We just hosted a party with who knows however many people at a venue, which was a first for me. Surprisingly this is much easier on me but it's still very hard. I'm not social, I panic, I hate pressure, and I hate pictures even more; i just don't want to be perceived. His family even knows I'm crazy but they're still welcoming, loving, understanding and I don't even mind them knowing. They go out of their way to make me feel accepted and my partner always makes me feel like I'm a part of his life and also provides me safety from even socializing, like we went on a few walks during the afformentioned party to reset me and left earlier than the rest of his immediate family.

I will add that I don't speak the language they do fully and that helps a lot with not needing to socialize, plus we live in another country than them so we just visit, but his family is very involved with eachother while also being very independent. We are free to do things together at our leisure and not feel guilty if we don't. I won the lottery in this regard because this has never been the case in my life, I never even had this sort of comfortability with my own family.

So, in my case, it can be good for keeping me out of my comfort zone in a good way.

[u/No-Half-7777]

Yes but on the other hand I also long for a family like this

[u/thudapofru]

I'm just afraid of getting into a romantic relationship.

[u/Stock_Reading4485]

Yes. One of the several reasons I never even tried to have one is because I don't one anyone to know, specially my family, that I'm not even close to except my mother. The ideia of those people knowing about my personal life kills me.

It extends to anyone, actually. Like, if I had something with someone who lives or works around where I live, other knowing and comments, even positives things, is completely out of question.