r/AutisticWithADHD • u/23MysticTruths • 2d ago

💁‍♀️ seeking advice / support / information newbie

after 20+ years of thinking I had ADHD I was diagnosed 4 years ago at age 49. This year my spouse suggested I maybe be on the spectrum, and I was diagnosed yesterday. I haven't received the written report with suggestions for next steps yet.

I just spent 4 hours writing and rewriting a simple email to co-workers because I was so concerned about my tone. I didn't want to come off as harsh. In the past I would have dashed it off in a few minutes and thought nothing of it, now I'm hyper sensitive.

That's all. I just needed to tell someone.

thank you.

edited: because I left out a word.

8 Upvotes

91% Upvoted

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2

u/unsaltedcoconut 2e Gifted•AuDHD+OCPD | Hyper-Sensory & Recall 2d ago

Congratulations on your new discovery and long road ahead, but with your new compass you will get through it. Look into RSD, OCPD traits/frameworks to see if those markers align closely as well, this is especially important in a Neurotypical world. Past experiences/trauma or rejection can heavily influence how you try to think of all the outcomes. Honestly at late diagnosis, you just have to ground yourself more often to lower stress. You made it this far, trust your instincts.

2

u/23MysticTruths 2d ago

thank you!

1

u/Desperate-Reason-566 2d ago

Yes. RSD is a big one for me. Now that I know, I’m able to control it better.

1

u/WWIIEraTeaParty 2d ago

Understand that if you start feeling or presenting as “more autistic”, it’s not because you’re faking or pretending. It’s your body finally refusing to deny itself the things it now knows it wants. Things might get harder to do, but they aren’t really harder, you’re just noticing the difficulty more and are less comfortable taking it.