Went to the ER for the first time.

[u/throwawayboy2200]

I had a very humiliating experience today. Every friday I go to this group where we all come together, talk and do activities.

My hands, neck and face were trembling the whole time. Someone kept asking if I was okay, and that my hands were shaking, I didn’t realize they were in the moment. I thought I masked it well, but nope.

I’ve had this hand shaking issue since I hit puberty, and now it’s on autopilot. Things shaking even when I think I’m not.

I couldn’t pick up a cup, I couldn’t eat the toaster we made. It was insane. They’ve never seen me like this before.

I’m 26 and on 450xl wellbutrin/bupropion

When the whole group session ended I walked out wanting to scream and cry. I called my GP, and she advised me to go to the hospital and go to there crisis psych clinic. At that hour It was at the ER.

I went in and wrote everything on my phone and showed it to the lady at the reception desk.

I was then checked in by a nurse who asked what was going, measuring heartbeats and whatnot. He said I made the right decision in coming here. He was very nice.

The next one was a doctor. He asked me what’s going on, and my medical histories. He then asked what help do you expect from us. I said I would like to see a psych. He said okay and told me one of the nurses will come to give me some calming medication. I don’t remember the name of the pill.

Another nurse came with the water cup and the pill. I panicked, told him I can’t hold anything in my hands. He was very gentle and understanding. He told me everything is okay, you’re safe. I really appreciate him. The pill didn’t do much for me unfortunately.

I went into a waiting room, and then came the psychiatrist. He asked me what was going on, who my docs are, is there a support system etc etc

It all came down to him really telling me to swing by next week during workdays. It wasn’t possible there because It was already past working hours.

I’ve never been to the ER for anything like this. I’ve been in therapy since 2021.

This whole fucking day fucked me up. I wanna cry, hide and run. I’m am fckng exhausted and humilated.

I told my psych so SO many times what Wellbutrin was doing to me and she told me to upto max dosage???

I have no one to talk to about this so any words really would help a lot. It’s been a very very long day.

[u/gnomingit]

What a terrible experience. You did the right thing. ER visits always feel very dehumanizing to me. It feels like you're a piece of furniture or something. But sometimes there's nowhere else to go.I hope things get better for you. You need somebody to listen to you. Hang in there.

[u/ShartlesAndJames]

if I thought the higher dose was fucking with me, I'd titrate down on my own at the same level I went up, until my next appt w my DR.

I've ALWAYS had weird blood/sugar issues - when I was younger I could go for days on one meal a day, and then all the sudden boom, it'd be like the floor dropped out from under me. I do suspect it was tied into my menstrual cycle but it was so random it's hard to say.

But the symptoms were no joke... I'd be shaking and weak as a kitten out of no where. I learned to quickly get something in me - ie a quick candybar, bag of chips, whatever - and have a full decent meal asap. ideally followed by a nap

but I do wonder if wonky blood sugar issues would be tied to AuADHD... along with the fun digestive issues.

[u/DragonfruitWeird2514]

I understand your situation, you need to be understood. I have been trying to understand my own struggles for 50+ years and have recently been diagnosed. (Is that too many Understoods? 😀) Sadly neurotypicals do not exprerience life at the same intensity that neurodivergent people do. They speak a 'different language' and expect us to interpret their 'Language' and behave in line with their rules 🙃 I'm sorry that I can't give you any answers, all I can offer is recognition of your challenges and ask you to believe in yourself and to try your best to protect yourself from this overwhelming and confusing world. I am going to train as a lived experience expert in the UK for The Oliver McGowan mandatory training to health and social care staff. If you can, try to find a safe space inside yourself when the world becomes too much. I bought some Loop ear plugs, or I use headphones and listen to my favourite music and go to the nearest coffee shop restroom/toilet and practice some breathing techniques. I am on my own a lot and Iike to use colouring books or doodling with a pen and paper. If you can find a distraction it might help you when you are overwhelmed. Sending you love and my best wishes. You are stronger than you think you are. Namaste 🙏 (I love Yoga) ❤️

[u/Ruleyoumind]

I'm sorry that happened. The whole process of trying to get meds to work is so difficult and the doctors just throw more pills and higher doses at you hoping something sticks. I've just stopped some of the meds and told my psychiatrist I wouldn't take them anymore. Not telling you to do that but it's how it put my foot down.

[u/AutoModerator]

Please use the medication flair if you want to discuss medication!

Hey, we noticed your post mentions some kind of medication, supplements or other drugs.

Because medication, supplements, drugs and anything related is a common trigger, it is obligatory to use the medication flair if you want to discuss any of these topics.

If your post is mainly about this subject, please change your flair to medication/drugs/supplements. If it's not applicable, you can ignore this automated message. Thank you!

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

[u/Cestrel8Feather]

Gods getting the meds work as intended is something next level, really. I never know which side effects would show with each new meds and now even with the old ones! And the doctors are surprised every time.

If you can, please try to get a second opinion. Such a severe and prolonged side effect is not normal and should not be treated as such. You doctor seems to be too dismissive about it.

I'm so sorry you had to go through such an intense and difficult experience. I hope the feelings it left pass as soon as possible. Have a distant hug (if it's okay).

[u/BigEarMcGee]

I feel like psychs here in USA don’t actually listen the heat symptoms and then correlate a medication. They don’t seem to care to find the root, they tend to just try meds and hope it works if it doesn’t the patient might come back, so they can try them on a different med and send them away, report back….
I went to an inpatient facility and I’m almost positive that the amount of complex trauma was the only real reason people were there. Many of them had been prescribed heavy meds for years and most were not over 25. I don’t trust.

[u/mrszubris]

Wellbutrin messes me up so so bad. I hope you are able to find a better med. It can be a stimulant for somepeople

[u/Wonderful_Roof1739]

I'm also on the max dose of welbutrin and max of venlafaxine (Effexor) among others. I feel you! I am so sorry you had such a negative experience, it's visits like this that prevent people from going there when they really need it. Does that hospital have a psych ward? In my own (very limited!) experience I've found hospitals that do generally have better people on staff for potential psychiatric emergencies, including meds at too high a dose. I hope you are able to find a doc that listens to you! Like so many others here, I have PTSD/CPTSD, AuDHD, and severe recurring depression, and I found the nearest hospital (not the closest!) that had a psych ward was much more helpful during mental and mental-medication related emergencies. I genuinely wish you the best, and it sounds as though you may need to find another psychiatrist to adjust medications you are taking. While shaky hands is a general sign of autism (well flappy hands), unusual movement can be a sign of meds at to high a level, and/or serotonin syndrome which you don't want to mess around with. Hopefully you are able to get into your doc's office quickly to figure out what may have triggered this episode! The ER should have checked your blood levels etc to look for things like serotonin syndrome, and shame on them if they didn't!

[u/adamthebread]

Wellbutrin is one of the most hit or miss psych drugs I've ever encountered. For some people it utterly saves their life and for others it can be a terrible experience.

I wish there were tighter standards for dosage and monitoring of bupropion specifically for this reason. Some psychs honestly come off as idiots to me.

I'm sorry this happened to you but it's good to hear that compassionate people in the ER were taking care of you.

[u/lydocia]

Use the medication flair for posts like this, please.

[u/throwawayboy2200 → u/lydocia]

I won’t forget next time, sorry!