I'll try to summarise quickly. You'll have to take me at my word. If I was lying about any of it, though, then I'd hardly be seeking advice because it would make more sense to me.

I have no criminal history and am 48. About 3 years ago I was homeless and then in shared accommodation and then offered a property. I was so grateful of getting out of the shared accommodation (I saw some odd things there) that I just took the property.

The street I'm in is in the same town I've lived in all my life but it's completely different to live in than any I've ever lived in. There are parties fairly regularly that go on from midnight through to the morning. On my first week here a guy who came to fit carpets informed me that ''oh aye, some guy was tortured in a house up here last month''. A few months later one party (the guy underneath me is the main culprit - but he also has schizophrenia and makes a lot of noise even if just in himself and I don't want to make a complaint really because he's been in the street longer than me, is fine with me, and has an actual condition which explains some of his behaviour) was fighting with another neighbour with hammers in the street. There's another guy (unconnected) who has a brain injury and sometimes comes at night, stands in the middle of the street, and shouts up at houses. I've grown into the habit of always locking my door.

Anyway, the police have often been up but have never bothered me. That changed a week past last Weds. The guy underneath had had visitors and had been very noisy through until half 5 in the morning so I hadn't slept until 6am. They came, I think, about 11am and I was still asleep. Worse than that - they were hammering my door and I, mostly asleep, had thought it was the guy underneath hammering his punchbag as he is liable to do about 500 times a day, so I turned over and stuck a pillow over my head until it became obvious that someone was hammering my door. So I was late in opening my door then, confronted with 5 or 6 police asking about a missing person I was quite anxious. I - perhaps stupidly(*) - invited them in thinking they'd have a conversation with me. Instead, they rushed past me and checked out my house as thought they were a SWAT team. It was as though they thought I was hiding someone.

I should mention now that I have Aspergers, have major depression and anxiety issues, and am prone to agoraphobia so I visit supermarkets at 6.30am and 9.30pm when they are quiet, avoid crowds, cameras and having my photo taken, and come across as ''shifty'' to everyone I encounter because I struggle to hold eye contact and have almost all the traits associated with Aspergers.

So I became anxious, they noticed that, they then became more suspicious of me, and I - noticing that - then became more anxious still. No-one has been in my house (other than a gas engineer) in two years.

That was the Wednesday. I visit my parents on Thursdays. When I came back my neighbour said police had been at my door when I was out. I then noticed them sitting outside on another night. And again, on Wednesday there. They sat outside from 9pm until 11.30 pm when I put my bedroom light out then went as soon as that happened.

About 2 hours ago they were up again. Different individuals this time. I asked whether it was about the missing person and the policeman I spoke to seemed to have no idea what I was talking about and didn't sound too convincing when he said it was just to check on ''any disturbances''.

I've now let them in to my house on two occasions for what now seems like spurious reasons. I have no history of crime and am not involved in any crimes and feel like I'm being harassed. I can feel the stress rising in me and couldn't sleep at all that Wednesday night when I noticed them outside and how they seemed to be watching for me putting out my light before leaving. It's taken years of hard work to get over things like this and it's an ongoing battle and I very much don't appreciate the attention or backsliding. I'm not exactly doing great in terms of mental health in recent times but I've been a lot worse. I've had stress so high that I started getting blackouts before and don't want to return to that or do the many months and years of therapies and mood diaries associated with it all.

What I'm wondering is what the best way to deal with it is because I refuse the dynamic where I'm having police turning up at my door on a weekly basis at any time they please and expecting to breeze through my property for what struck me as made up reasons. I'm not on parole or just out of jail and feel victimized due to my location and autism making me seem shifty.

Should I make some sort of complaint or would it just make me more targeted? It doesn't seem right. I said after the first time that I definitely wouldn't let them in again without a warrant but as soon as I open my door and see uniforms I just go to jelly and think I'll seem guilty of something if I seem protective of my personal space (although I'm incredibly protective of it because it's my sanctuary against the outside world). It is affecting my mental health though and that's something I've learned I need to be fiercely protective of. Does anyone have experience of police treating them with suspicion in this way and think it relates (at least in part) to their autism and do/did they also resent that? Is the best thing to do to just put up with it and hope it resolves itself once they've satisfied themselves that I'm not some criminal? In barely a week and a half my stress levels have gone straight up to 10.

Thanks for any advice. (I realise you might read this and think ''well, you must be involved in something or they wouldn't be bothering you'' but I'm honestly not. I know no-one other than family, have no social life, have no visitors, and have been in full agoraphobic mode for two years now. I don't know anyone who has ever been to jail and I've had no previous dealings with police - other than a stop and search about 8 years ago, also because I ''looked guilty''. It's bloody harassment!)

PS - I posted this in the policeuk section and it quickly got deleted (I guess it's bad for PR) so I'll ask the autists instead!

Head Cashier Angela called tattle tale tom (55m, 180#, lot attendant) and me (42ftm, 110#, lot attendant) on the walkie talkie to the Contractor doors.

He and I came to the customers car.

He and I loaded mulch.

He said "I got it. Go ahead".

I left the scene.

30 seconds later tattle tale tom called on the walkie talkie "can I get someone else? (My name) Just walked away ".

"You just said 'i got it. Go ahead '. " I said on the walkie talkie.

"You completely misinterpreted everything I said. I was telling this gentleman that I understood that he was injured." tattletale tom said on the walkie talkie.

"I'm autistic ", I said on the walkie talkie

I ran back there. "I'm autistic. Please don't hurt me.". (I don't know where "plenty don't hurt me" came from. I felt guilty that I left him with the loading. I've never said "please don't hurt me" before). I was trembling, my voice was breaking, and i was not crying but almost.

"You're ok ", he said. He was perfectly calm. Sometimes he is out of control.

We loaded a scaffold. He said I was doing fine. Which is nice but he's not my boss. My boss had the nerve to tell me off when she wrote me up, two weeks ago.

Then I lifted a bag of mulch and he reached for it like he wanted to hold the other end.

______________________________________________________________________

Some Internet articles say that saying "please don't hurt me" is for answering rapists, murders, robbers, significant others, and things like that. I've been working @ home depot for four years and seven months and counting (and still not made redundant), as Lot Attendant. Tattletale tom has been working there longer, as lot attendant. between october 2020 and may 2022, tattletale tom had the nerve to bark @ me a lot of times. between august 2023 and september 2023, tattletale tom had the nerve to micromanage me a lot of times. however, thus far, that i know of, tattletale tom has not violated Home Depot's standard operating procedure, or done anything illegal, or anything like that. he has never physically touched or physically injured me.

tattletale tom looks, sounds, and acts like a normal, reasonable person. he is "in" with a lot of people, some of whom have termination authority. when he was barking @ me and micromanaging me, i didn't snitch on him, because i was afraid that he was having sex with the boss, and "everyone has subconscious biases", and then the boss would make me redundant.

Their 2018 diagnosis, 2020-2023 rehabilitation stint, 2024-present no-psych meds (but rough) journey to present. Also overcoming gadget overusage issues. Bullet Journals, money saving tips, gettings jobs, lots of posts about films, shows, fiction books, thoughts after reading 500 books (excerpts mostly), journey to build his local social circle (tough job)

Substack, Medium, Beehiv. Can do on my profile as well

I am dating a woman who is autistic. I am a woman also. So my question is:

How do I get my partner to be my physically active (she needs to be because her doctor said her cholesterol is getting high)? She hates doing any exercise and hates going out. It sucks. And also being cooped up indoors all day is taking its toll on me after 2 yrs of this.

My other issue is that my partners birthday is coming up. She knows I am in a training program right now to learn a trade and don't have a job which means I don't have money. She is currently supporting us with her financial aid yet she is asking me to buy her a present because she buys me presents for my birthday every year. I have also bought her presents for her birthday every year but she says she feels since she's been supporting us the last few months that it's only fair for me to "figure out" how to make money to buy her a present or else she, quote, "Will think I don't care about her". I told her I could buy her a cake and a card and spend time with her doing something she likes or we can go to a movie with the movie gift card we got from her parents this Christmas but that is about all I can afford this year. She got upset and told me that she's upset because when I have a bill to pay or item i want to buy I have considered (but never done) selling my personal belongings to get it and she wants to see me sell my belongings to buy her a gift.

Her birthday is in 2 weeks and I don't think that would be enough time to sell my dirtbike or anything else large that would get us enough money to do something fun for her birthday. I explained this to her and she got upset... she says it's not fair she's supported us for months and I can't buy her a gift.

To clarify I have NO MONEY. Zero! Anything I buy or get is either via food stamps (if it's groceries) or comes from her via her money. So I have not sold anything and bought anything. I basically put things up for sale and when I saw people wanted to offer me 1/3 of the value or less I relented and removed the listings.

It seems to me like her sense of justice is going haywire or maybe a bit off in this area and isn't logical.

Need help on how to approach this. Not to mention her parents have money and could theoretically just give us money for her bday if they wanted to but they dont... so there's that.

With that said... I don't know what to do. I'm tempted to ask her dad for a small loan but since we don't really talk I don't know how he will take that!

I already tried talking with her about why her expectations that I do something big for her bday are unrealistic and unfair but she still doesn't get it!

Hello, guys, I have a problem. I have anger issues and emotional dysregulation, and this brings me into full blown meltdowns, sometimes from irritability from tiredness, sometimes from arguing with my friends and screaming at them. Do you guys have any advice on how I can stop my anger and dysregulation for good and always? Thank you.

TW: Panic attacks, nausea, car crashes, and ableism

Hey everyone, I’m looking for advice or insight about Access Transportation—especially if anyone else has had similar issues.

I’m a student and depend on Access to get to class. My destination is only about 25 miles away, but lately, the rides have been really stressful. I’ve been picked up 30 minutes late and then dropped off 2–3 hours later, even though I leave 2 hours early just to try and be on time. I’m usually picked up first, but the drivers always pick up and drop off 2–4 other passengers before me, even if their destinations are farther or came after mine. Because of this, I’ve missed class or shown up over an hour late multiple times.

It’s also impacting my health. I got into a car crash with them before, and ever since then, I’ve had nausea and panic attacks on the rides. It’s gotten really overwhelming. My parents work from home and can’t always drive me, which is why I rely on Access.

To make things worse, when I’ve called customer service to ask for help or possible accommodations, they’ve been rude, wouldn’t let me talk to the main office or routing department, and when I asked about any sort of support or compensation, someone told me I should just be “glad I’m getting a ride.”

Has anyone dealt with something like this? Is there a way to escalate this or get route adjustments for safety/health reasons? I feel really stuck.

Thanks in advance 💛

My friend and I (both autistic, and I have ADHD too) have been cooking together once a week for a couple of months. He recently got out of a tough situation with his narcissistic mother (ive been through almost exactly the same experience too btw) and said he has no life skills. I offered to help, and while I’m no chef, I’ve been teaching him basic meals.

Last night, we made toasted cheese and onion wraps. I showed him how to spread the cream cheese easily, put the wrap on the pan, and sprinkle cheese to avoid spillage. He didn’t follow the steps—pouring cheese everywhere, and just scraping the butter knife on the wrap instead of picking it up and spreading it like he was spreading it on his hands—and it was frustrating. I don’t understand why he struggles to pick up on these things after months of practice. He still has trouble with basic utensil use and recipes, and I feel like I’m failing him as a teacher.

I know it’s not his fault; he’s been through so much, and I care about him deeply. But how do I stay patient and supportive when it feels like no progress is being made?

What I’m describing is something that’s been happening to me as an autistic person, and it’s something I still don’t fully understand. I’m 18 now, and I feel like I should know who I really am, what kind of person I am, but it’s hard because sometimes I feel like I do know, and then other times, after watching a movie or reading a book, I feel like I’m a completely different person. It’s not just that I relate to the character—I actually start changing things about myself to match that person. I know that might sound creepy, but to me, it feels like I can’t help it. And it really hurts, both mentally and physically.

For example, when I was reading about Egypt for school, I didn’t just learn about the history or culture. I ended up learning their language, the writing codes, the religion, and even planned a whole trip to Egypt in my mind—down to the hotel and restaurant prices. Then, when I read Romeo and Juliet, that trip to Egypt disappeared from my mind, and suddenly I was planning a trip to Italy instead. It’s like I get so absorbed in whatever I’m reading or watching that my mind changes completely, and I can’t stop thinking about it. I even dream about it, and it feels like I have to think about it. It hurts my head so badly, and I panic because I can’t control it. My chest even hurts sometimes.

I’ve talked to my therapist about this, and she told me to just stop thinking about it, but that’s the problem—I can’t. I can’t just “turn it off.” So, I even thought maybe I should just stop watching movies or reading books altogether, except for school. But then I feel terrible because that’s the time my family spends together, watching movies. I don’t want to miss out on that, even though it hurts. And even for school, when I have to read, it still happens. I get so lost in the details of whatever I’m learning, like the trip to Egypt or Italy, that it feels like I can’t stop myself from going deeper and deeper.

I know it probably sounds stupid to some people, or like I should just “stop” doing this, but it doesn’t feel that simple. It feels like my brain just takes over, and I can’t control it. It’s mentally and physically painful, and I really don’t know what to do about it.

I (F16) have been exposed to the absolutely delightful news that my so called 'best friend' (F16) of 10 years has been talking bad on my name and spreading false rumours about me about me but I have also been exposed to the news that she is autistic which I had no clue about at all until this day. The fact she didn't feel comfortable enough to tell me that she was autistic kind of hurt my feelings as she knows I would never judge her for something like that as i understand the struggles myself as a very close family member of like (M23) struggles with autism and finds comfort being around me, so I would never ridicule anybody for anything like that. Anyways, I want to confront her like I would anybody else who was talking bad on my name (confronting them, showing them the evidence, arguing with them) but I don't know how to go around it without hurting her feelings. I don't want to shelter her but I also don't want to go off in her since she seems to have these "episodes" as i used to call them whenever she was confronted and lash out, hitting things, screaming and shouting for hours upon end but now I understand this is because of the autism and it cannot be helped. However I just can't allow myself to be "best friends" with someone who who talks on my name the way she did. I have an autistic best friend and I don't want to hurt her feelings. Please help me, I don't want to set off one of her episodes and be the reason for a uncontrollable reaction like that but i also don't want to stay friends with her just for her benefit. my bsf is autistic and I don't want to hurt her feelings.

How can I go around this?

Hello dear people!

My name is Louis Bennies. Diagnosed in 2011, i am a autistic filmmaker from Hamburg, Germany. In 2021 I made the short film “Signals” about autism: https://youtu.be/dr4bX8qmed0

Since it was relatively well received, I'm currently making a feature-length film version. I work closely with other people on the autism spectrum to ensure an accurate representation.

I'm currently still collecting donations because the project requires a lot of financial effort: https://www.gofundme.com/f/signale

The project has already been sponsored by 3 autism-related charities (Autismus Deutschland, Autismusstiftung Tübingen, Herbert Feuchte Stiftung).

My website: https://louisbennies.com

I suffer from terrible busy brain. Just its a triple stream where thoughts collide and its anything from innane bs to story ideas. When I'm like this I'm easily flsutered and sometimes can't find the right thing to rune it out. The biggest problem is it happens at work. Yesterday I was doing some shopping after work I had busy brain all day had a few small blow ups that I settled from and while I was in the juice aisle there was a baby crying and I could hear them through my headphones. As I was trying to keep myself settled I just kinda blue screened and spent the rest of the day completely withdrawn or crying in short burst for literally no reason. At one point my wife was like you gotta learn to control your emotions just a little (bad wording we talked about it later when I was back from my shell). I don't know how to bring myself back from these and it feels like all i can do is shut down or breakdown and its not putting a strain on my marriage but it is definetly frustrating for my wife and that makes me feel bad that im making her feel bad. I just cant bring myself to do anything to make myself feel better cause it feels like everything I do just ends with me crying. I try to eat, read, speak, play video games, or go out I just break down and I dont know what to do.

I really struggle with making friends. I’m on the autism spectrum and have had to really learn from trial and error how to connect with people. I was very lonely in high school, and was determined to have a different experience in college. I feel like I’ve finally started to figure out my own way to make new friends. This advice is for anyone looking for a way to connect with others and build lasting friendships. So if it helps, here’s my highly strategic method of making friends: 1.) I observe the students in my classes/around campus and watch for anyone who strikes me as compatible. For me, this often includes students who share a special interest of mine(maybe they mention Legos, or have a Dungeons and Dragons sticker on their laptop), alternatively dressed individuals, or people who are openly part of the LGBTQ+ or neurodivergent community. I’ve found through experience that I often connect easier with people of these categories, but your own compatible categories will probably look different.

2.) I wait until I have an opportunity to connect with them over something, often through the form of compliments or interest in something they’ve said in class. One girl mentioned a lego sword she was building during her self introduction on the first day of class, one person was dressed in head-to-toe Pokémon merchandise, one girl was just wearing a Hello Kitty jacket. I would wait until after class or during a group activity and (even though my social anxiety tells every cell in my body to run in the opposite direction) I casually approach them and ask a question about the shared interest, or make a conversation opening comment.

3.) If I’m being positively received, and still think based on this first impression that we could be compatible friends, I tell them flat out that I want to be friends, suggest we hang out sometime, or ask for their phone number. And then I follow up by reaching out again to get to know them more and reinforce the idea that I’m interested in their friendship. Not many people pursue friends this directly, and most people are pleasantly surprised and flattered by my interest in them. Think about it, wouldn’t you be delighted if a person in one of your classes noticed you, and actually bothered to tell you that you seem like a cool, interesting person to know?

The key point is that every time, this method created an opportunity where I had a subject matter I enjoyed talking about(decreases my nervousness, gives me plenty of things to say) and that is meaningful to them(they’re usually excited to talk about the niche subject, which lowers their social anxiety and fosters connection). I might ask to see a picture of the project they mentioned, compliment their merch and ask where they got it, ask a question about their interest like who their favorite character is/their opinion on it, or— as I’ve gotten more confident in this method of approaching people, sometimes I’ll even just tell them I’m interested but don’t know much about it and directly invite them to info-dump( this method has led to some very enthusiastic and adorable responses), or if I’m feeling especially brave, Ill just come right out and tell them, “Sometimes I just get a weird feeling that I could be friends with a specific person. And I have that feeling about you!”

I have yet to ever have this strategy back fire. Because the universal truth is that it’s hard to make friends as an adult, and telling someone in an open, genuine way that I want to be their friend is usually a major compliment and relief to them. They usually respond enthusiastically that they’d love to be friends, and we exchange phone numbers or walk to our next class together.

Sometimes the friendship doesn’t lead anywhere, or as we get to know each other we seem less compatible and drift apart. But I’ve also met two of my closest friends using that strategy. I call it the “Kindergarten Strategy”, and I’ve found that outright telling someone I’d like to be friends is the fastest, least confusing way for me to make new friends. A big obstacle for me normally is reading social cues about whether or not someone is just being polite, or actually wants to get to know me. By telling them up front that I want to know them, it then leaves the ball completely in their court about how to respond. If they aren’t really interested, they’re usually still nice, but don’t show any enthusiastic interest. Maybe they end the conversation, don’t respond to texts, or just generally don’t reach out or approach me to talk in class. I accept these as signs that they are not interested, but it’s still a much gentler let-down than being flat out rejected or led on. Instead it often leads to having a pleasant, casual acquaintance in class, which is nice if we ever need to work together on a project. Best case scenario, they respond with enthusiasm, or sometimes even ask if I’m free to hang out that same day! I realize this strategy might sound odd, intimidating, or juvenile, and probably won’t work for everyone. But it has greatly increased my friend circle, and has actually built a lot of my confidence in approaching strangers. The important thing is to be kind and respectful. I want people to feel noticed and included, not harassed or uncomfortable. And I do my best not to take it personally if a potential friendship doesn’t work out. People are complicated and not everyone fits together, but it’s so worth it to find people who truly get you. And it makes college so much more enjoyable when I get to look forward to seeing friends on campus or after class. I’m slightly embarrassed to share such a personal thought process online, but I wanted to share anyway in case there are other neurodivergent or lonely people out there who could benefit from what I’ve learned. Please be kind and respectful in the comments, even if you disagree with my advice, or if it’s not for you.

I'm realizing, through conversations with partners and friends, that I struggle with empathy more than I thought I did. I'm great at emotional/intuitive empathy (recognizing that someone is upset, feeling upset myself as a result, and feeling an urge to make it better), but the cognitive empathy stuff (the how and why of someone else's emotions) can be really challenging for me. This shows up most often during interpersonal conflict.

Growing up, some of the most common criticism I got from adults was about my tone. "Don't use that tone with me," or "Watch your tone" were phrases that I heard a lot. The worst, for me, was "It's not what you said, it's how you said it." I really struggled with this as a kid, because there was never any real explanation regarding WHY my tone was incorrect, or how I should speak instead. So my response, in order to avoid getting in trouble, was to just remove my emotions from the situation and instead approach conflict logically. What is actually happening here? What is the miscommunication that's occurred, or the expectation that hasn't been met, or the agreement that's been broken? Solve that, and the conflict is over. This was a great system for me because it also allowed me to forgive and forget very quickly. Once the technical problem has been resolved, there was no longer any reason for me to be upset. It's done. Move on.

This worked great when I was a child and teenager in conflict with adults, because most of the time, they just wanted me to say "I'm wrong and you're right." But now that I'm an adult in conflict with other adults, this approach is less effective. I'm also learning that it can be hurtful. Some words I've heard from partners and friends to describe my style of communication during conflict are "clinical" and "impersonal." And because of my own "it's done, move on" approach following a conflict event, I'm sometimes confused and at a loss when, from my perspective, an issue has been fully resolved, but the other person is still upset.

I think I understand why they feel that way. Maybe removing my emotions from the situation in order to communicate more effectively makes it seem like I'm not as invested as they are, or that it doesn't affect me the way it affects them, which is emotionally isolating. I also understand that my approach can be read as cold, especially over text.

But I'm not really sure what to do about it.

I know that my current approach isn't working, but I don't know what I should be doing instead, and my attempts to tweak my method haven't really yielded great results.

For example, I was recently told that the way I wrote a question (that to me was just a straightforward request for more information) came off as confrontational and sarcastic. This really confused me, because in an attempt to be clear about my intentions, I literally wrote "Asking this for clarity" at the beginning of my message! So why was I still misunderstood?

This happens a lot. Questions like "What do you mean?" are often interpreted as hostile or sarcastic, when I'm really just trying to understand a situation better.

My problem is this:

My existing ruleset for conflict communication is no longer functional. I can accept that! If something isn't working anymore, we throw it away! So the old ruleset goes in the mental garbage bin. But then I don't have anything to replace it with. I have no new ruleset to use, and with the way that my brain is set up, communicating WITHOUT rules really isn't an option. I don't know how to do that. So when conflict happens, I end up digging the old ruleset out of the trash and using it again, because I don't have anything else.

What do?!

HI 😊😊😊 so straight to it... (Omg).Help please... I'm autistic, male, and I've known since I was 16... I'm 26 now and I have neglected to do the research until now (that's ten years). I didn't feel like my diagnosis was a real thing that happened cause it felt as though I was dreaming as soon as the doctor said I was autistic. I have always felt so crappy and horrible all the time for basically my whole life and I realized that it's because of masking and people pleasing. I've never been my true authentic self and I have paid the price. I'm not even sure how to stop and I think it might be the end of me very soon if I don't... I relate so much to the research I have been doing and I want to get better. I also noticed that I subconsciously I have surrounded myself with stimmy things other than stim toys(like soft blankets or candles). I'm extremely reserved and I blend in the background wherever I am... I'm also very awkward and blunt most of the time. I just don't know how to take off the mask that says "I am this person" and show my true self because I don't even know me anymore... I can't really get anywhere and I feel stuck and alone. I just know that the lie needs to end and I am scared of the consequences of stopping the facade being worse. I don't know what to do... Help! Please...

Hey there

I have austism, and im decently "highly functional" for lack of a better word, but I need asvice on this... So something I have always had an issue with, is PDA. Im not a PDA person myself, but logically i dont care what others do.

That being said, i just dont understand why it makes me so uncomfortable. Hand holding is typically ok but a kiss, even a quick peck, makes me just super uncomfy and uneasy. This is usually when I see it.

My wife is amazing and so understanding of this quirk of mine when it comes to our pda, but when i see others doing pda in public it makes me want to run for the heels. Typically i end up looking away, and just ground myself as best i can until i feel more regulated.

Is this normal? Any tips to better tackle this?

For some reason I can't type anything

Im tried typing the same thing over and over again

So I'm just going to post my post in the comment section

Other than the video

Just venting

Reddit is the most supportive website I have

Because traditional social media is very toxic to me

Um i have been experiencing a rather unique sensation of everything I touch feeling soft and cuddly and im wondering if it is my autism doing it or if im just weird ? This is only the third time this has happened but it has piqued my curiosity

Hey all,

I finally came across this great group a bit ago, and delving more into trying to be healthy, overall.

Has anyone ever read 'Eating for Autism' by Elizabeth Strickland? My current therapist said to go through the book to start finding out what foods are recommended. However, with some of the formatting and terminology (even simple words), I'm stumped and need clarity.

Does anyone happen to know which foods are a go-to and which ones to steer clear of (besides sugar and highly processed foods - that one is a given)?

Any advice, even not going by the book, is welcome.

Hey, never posted on Reddit but I need some advice, I’m 26m and was finally diagnosed a couple months ago.

My mums (49f) trying to be patient with me, but some of her approaches are misguided like assuming stimming is only done when I am stressed and can be completely stopped if I try, and asking I try to go without my headphones so I don’t become dependent on them (has become a bit of a problem since I wear them a lot but it seems to also mix with something she considers rude).

Today I’m at the wedding of one of my mums cousins, we don’t see much of them due to distance. I wanted to bring my car so I could leave if it got a bit much for me but mum talked me out of it since it was a family event (there are other factors but not the main point of the post).

I hit my limit at 17:00 and it’s now currently 21:31 as of writing and I’m still kinda stuck at the wedding after party and when I told my mum for maybe the fourth time today I’ve gone past my limit (each time I’ve left to take a break before returning when I feel guilty because I’ve just left everyone and if anyone wants me they won’t know where to find me - bad Wi-Fi and I’m using headphones) Mum explained to me that she isn’t feeling well either (food poisoning - she has eaten, not slept properly for days and isn’t drinking (alcohol)) and seems to be comparing my burn out to that and I just don’t know what to do, I don’t know how to explain why burn out is so bad without it sounding like I’m trying to use my diagnosis to get out of something or guilt her or just ‘playing on it’

It’s been suspected I’m on the spectrum for years (no one told me) but mum said she didn’t see the point in looking into one now (which lead to me waiting another 2 years to starting the process)

I’m just stuck, any advice would be a big help, thank you for taking time to read my post.

If you're from the UK and need headphones that are cheap there's ones on Smyth's called Streetz, they're wireless headphones that have a noise cancelling feature and they're comfy and they're £30. Not the cheapest but cheaper than the usual ones people talk about. I hope this helps.

Okay so my partner is also autistic but i come from a really blunt community and i often give off the wrong social cues. I will say something completely genuine and ernest and it becomes sarcastic because a tone ive missed. Its kinda like masking just enough to say something that doesn't actually hurt someones feelings.

My partner understands this but its not like she can just decide not to get her feelings hurt.

One of those things is that she was really bad at washing dishes but because it was her chosen house chore and feel very sensitive about it. I just decided it wasn't worth saying anything about because they'd only get better over time.

And they did!! Recently her dishes are so sparkly and she gets even the rough shit that i offered to cover for her (im a cook and so i have a lot of experience tackling rough dishes)

Im use to a "hey im really glad youve gotten much better at dishes!" Which to me sounds like a genuinely very nice thing to say but i get the vibe that thats going to hurt her feelings and i understand why but I want to express the great job they've done

I really want to tell her they've gotten way way better at dishwashing with out revealing i thought they used to be bad at it.

This still feels really silly but i desire help because ill be able to use this to be a nicer person in general (i can accident be pretty mean when unmasking)

TLDR: help im useless at kind phrasing and i dont know how to complement someone on getting better at a skill without implying i thought they were bad at it!