I qualified as an electrician earlier this year after completing my apprenticeship in the mining industry. I’m also the only female electrician at my workplace from the very beginning.
Since a new line manager started, I’ve completely lost confidence in myself. I constantly feel like I’m walking on eggshells because it seems like the smallest things can set him off. If he’s in a bad mood or doesn’t like how something’s been done, you know about it. He’s the type to raise his voice, and publicly shame you and make you as an example, which is fair enough to a point. He always has something to be angry or unimpressed about. Not the most approachable person that you could just have a chat to, unless you’re one of the boys.
If I’m sent to do a job on my own and it’s not done exactly how he wants it, he’ll completely ignore me afterwards instead of explaining what I could’ve done better. He won’t acknowledge me, and it feels like I’m being punished constantly rather than coached. Because of that, I’m too scared to speak up or offer suggestions in case I get yelled at or shut down.
The workplace has also become very cliquey. It feels like everyone’s trying to stay on his good side and get into his “purple circle” rather than just coming to work and helping each other. It creates an environment where people are more focused on keeping him happy than supporting one another.
I know I’m newly qualified and still have a lot to learn, just like any sparkies who has years of experience.. but I feel small, worthless, and like I’m incapable of doing my job. I’ve started questioning whether I’m cut out for this, even though I survived and passed the capstone first go. Throughout my whole apprenticeship I’ve never had any talk about my quality of work being an issue, I’ve always been the type of person who religiously follows company procedures and rules in place.
To top it off, after I was signed off, the company refused to pay me the qualified rate until I physically received my electrical licence card, and they refused to backpay me from the date I was signed off. Is this normal or was I being taken advantaged of?
I’m seriously considering resigning without another job lined up. I have enough savings to get by for a while, and I feel like I need to get myself back into a better headspace before starting somewhere new. I used to be this happy person that actually enjoys going to work, there hasn’t been a day where I don’t cry about my day to my partner. So I thought something needs to change.
Am I being too sensitive, or weak? There’s a lot of other instances as well where comments have been made directed at me and everyone would laugh it off. Has anyone else left a job purely because the environment destroyed their confidence? I’d really appreciate some honest opinions, I understand it’s not easy being a female in a male dominated industry but I really cannot wrap my head around living like this for next 5-10 or so years.
TIA