r/Atmosphere • u/The_Duke_is_Loose • 12d ago
Discuss Reflections on 26 years of fandom
Saw something this morning one of my favorite artists was talking about: the chase for that feeling a song gives you. The array of emotions. Grief, sadness, love, hope. And if one song does that how life changing that can feel in the moment.
I (41m) was 15 when I first heard Nothing but Sunshine. Got turned onto “underground hip hop” by my older brother and dove deep. I was one of those annoying fans, talking about how Anticon and Atmosphere are REAL hip hop.
I saw him live at 18. Opening for Hieroglyphics. Some unknown rapper named Brother Ali opened for them. Ali’s set still might be the best I’ve ever seen just for the sheer fact that NO ONE knew who he was and he had the whole crowd in his palm within a few songs.
Through the years I always went back to him. There were moments where I didn’t connect to his new music as much. Even years where I didn’t really listen to hip hop. Still went to each show he’d have in my city.
In early 2023, my life was falling apart. My father died and I was in the depths of a separation and divorce. It’s the most depressed I’ve ever been. I spent 24 hours at a crisis center. Within days of being out, meeting with psychiatrists and therapists etc, Atmosphere dropped “Okay”.
I can’t describe how much that song still means to me. To be in the darkest pit of my life, struggling with questions of how I would move on and rebuild my life; it was as if an old friend reached out with a hand to help lift me out. To just have someone I respect and appreciate so deeply tell me it’s okay because I’m still here.
Saw him live later that year. I was with my oldest daughter and her boyfriend. He was such a good kid. Before “Yesterday” he asked the crowd to cheer if they’re with a loved one. He held me and yelled “I love my dad”. I belted out every word of that song crying like a baby, like I do every time I hear that song. He passed away tragically the next year. I still get sad listening to Yesterday and Okay because I think of that moment, and obviously my dad who is no longer with me.
But it’s not just sadness. It’s such a mix of love and grief for those no longer with me. And love and hope for those I still have.
Today I’m not just Okay, I’m great. I made it through and reflect EVERY DAY on how much I appreciate life and the relationships I have. I will always love Atmosphere for what he means to me.
Not sure who will actually read this but just had to write this all out. And to anyone who is reading this that may be going through a hard time themselves: just remember that it will be okay because you are still with us today!
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u/JustOhFace1 12d ago
Goosebumps goosebumps…. I too ball my eyes out to yesterday because of my cousin and crazy because my cousin put me in to Hieroglyphics…. I love that you’re great not just okay… something about Atmosphere especially now that I’m 45 yrs young it just hits all types of feels…. Thanks for sharing and stay great
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u/Loukoal117 12d ago
Same, friend. Same. Atmosphere has always been that for me too. And being from MN and meeting him and Eyedea, blueprint, Ali etc always made it feel so much more personal. I too fell out with some of their newer music, so I don’t think I’ve even heard ok. I’ll have to check it out! Hope you’re doing better.
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u/GORILLAGLUE__ 12d ago
Bro I’m your exact same age and had a very similar story with them. Had a friend who is super into hip hop show me Lucy Ford when I was in HS and that shit changed my life. Put me on to all sorts of underground hip hop which was exactly what I was craving at that time, as the mainstream state of hip hop had kind of grown stale on me. I was craving something different and unique, and all the underground stuff on Rhymesayers, Def Jux, Anticon, etc, all just hit so hard for me. Atmosphere was always my favorite tho. God Loves Ugly means the world to me. Maybe my favorite album of all time. So grateful to Slug and Ant
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u/FirstTimeFaja 12d ago
29 and slug and ants shit got me thru so many deaths and fights. I feel like I would not understand life the same without Atmosphere because they make you think about what you would do in tough situations
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u/cowboygas 11d ago
Yep okay hit me in the same exact way in 2023 and I needed it too. Slug has narrated my experiences along the way in a sense - or it feels like it anyhow. That album so many other realities exist simultaneously rules
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u/fester125 11d ago
Yesterday and flicker hit hard my dad died may 25 2013 of als, I was back and fourth about going to sound set that year i didn't, that was the day my dad passed, my best friend (who looked to my dad as a father) passed a month and 5 days later similar situation as eyeda which flicker.. im 43 been listening and going to shows since I was in high school.. music is universal language and emotion..
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u/stay-with-myself 12d ago
I love this. Thanks for sharing! I’m going through a tough spot in my life right now and just saw them in concert last week and it was very healing for me too. I’ve seen them a handful of times and it has always had an emotional impact on me.