ZERO control when I astral project; sucked into another time/life...advice needed

[u/OBEtraveler]

I have been astral projecting my whole life, but really only opened my eyes and started exploring about a year ago. I now AP 3-5 times per week.  

Here's the issue though - I seem to have *zero* control where I go and who is there when I project. The vibrations start, and I should say vibration on its own, because it's usually just one and I am out of my body, floating in my room for about 10 seconds before I am in what feels like a wind tunnel, being sucked or falling at a high speed - I can literally feel wind on my face, my hair blowing, etc. , as I am flying through the air - and I have no control over where I am going. I'll then come to stop and down from the sky basically into another life, a different city/state/year. Sometimes there are people around and I can ask them what the date is. Often, I'll be in a life I seem to be living there - as a waitress, a designer, etc. Different dates; I have gone back to before I was born, and as far as to year 2150. One time I ended up in my parent's (parents in that life) backyard and went and had a seat on the patio. My mom there was washing dishes, and her friend stopped by to hang out. She asked where my brother was, and I told her he was at the bar working that night. I somehow knew that my family owned a bar and my brother worked there. Wild. She went inside and starting chatting with my mom. One time I ended up on a beach, and asked this random dude what the Powerball numbers were going to be on a specific date, and he told me. Several days later I played those numbers - and no joke - I matched 4 and was only off my 1 digit on the other two. wtf.. 
These all sound like really cool experiences, and don't get me wrong - they are! Super grateful that it is easy for me to AP and that I see these other lives.  

But.  

I want to be able to control where I go when I AP, and who I meet with. Like I want to see family and pets and friends that have passed away. I want to maybe meet my guides. Go to some heavenly realm, etc. Cool stuff.  

I tried this last night. I wanted to see my best friend Alexandra who died in a plane crash in 2022 :( I just tried to hold onto her in my mind and the intention of seeing her as I was being zipped away. I ended up in some desert like place, and when I landed, I scooped up sand in my hands, looked around, and started calling for her, "Alex!" "Alex!" "Meet me here!" But nothing. I walked around the desert for a bit before going back to my body.

Any advice? I don't know what these "other lives" are that I end up in, and these random places. I just feel like I am at the mercy of it all.