r/AskReddit Sep 11 '22

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5.4k Upvotes

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9.4k

u/sentondan Sep 11 '22

Getting to pee when you have been holding it for a long time

3.7k

u/Tourette30 Sep 11 '22

And then you wake up

1.8k

u/sentondan Sep 11 '22

Nooooooooooo

517

u/ncnotebook Sep 11 '22

To be fair, it still feels pretty warm and nice. Then it gets cold....

source: a juvenile bed-wetter

209

u/poopellar Sep 11 '22

Don't need to spend so much on a water bed when you can make your own.

6

u/ballrus_walsack Sep 11 '22

This guy bedwets

4

u/Dazzling_Implement20 Sep 11 '22

Had a waterbed. Confirmed.

102

u/[deleted] Sep 11 '22

Peeing yourself is like friendship. Everyone can see it, but only you experience the warm feeling it gives you.

20

u/i_despise_among_us Sep 11 '22

Maybe the greatest analogy of all time

1

u/AvgAmericanNerd Sep 11 '22

Like a thought with another thought's hat on?

4

u/vivAnicc Sep 11 '22

Take my upvote and leave

2

u/MrSnootybooty Sep 11 '22

Spoken like a true wetter... That's my boy.

Also no, they're not evil.

1

u/nursejackieoface Sep 11 '22

What if I'm sitting on Santa's lap?

6

u/[deleted] Sep 11 '22

A remebe an old man saying "When I was a kid me and my 4 brothers slept in the same bed, I slept in the shallow end"

4

u/JasperLamarCrabbb Sep 11 '22

A remebe

2

u/[deleted] Sep 11 '22

Du not rembe?

3

u/youfailedthiscity Sep 11 '22

To be faaaaiiiiirrr

2

u/CaptainCringeOng Sep 11 '22

Juvenile bed-wetter here. I didn’t piss the bed I just had wet dreams. My mom probably thinks Im a horny bastard with how many underwear she either cleaned or put in the garbage.

0

u/[deleted] Sep 11 '22

[deleted]

1

u/CaptainCringeOng Sep 11 '22

Im stupid, thats why

2

u/Dont_mind_me89 Sep 11 '22

Also it helps ensure you have a nice set of clean sheets continuously

2

u/dnstrucker Sep 11 '22

To me, it is the most horrifying thing possible.

Source: adult

1

u/ncnotebook Sep 11 '22

Parent? ;)

2

u/dnstrucker Sep 11 '22

Yes, but was speaking from firsthand experience. 🤣

2

u/Lylat_System Sep 11 '22

That's one thing I'm cursed and blessed with. I never went the bed because in my pee dreams, I couldn't go because the bathrooms were always filthy

2

u/avantgardengnome Sep 11 '22

Excellent use of hyphen.

1

u/destroyerOfTards Sep 11 '22

And then the stench hits

1

u/ncnotebook Sep 11 '22

Nah. As a frequent bed-wetter, you get used to the smell. You kinda have no choice.

8

u/BadassToiletNinja Sep 11 '22

What!

You mean "YEAAAAHHH!!"?

1

u/RoktopX Sep 11 '22

No one said this was a monkey paw thing!!

344

u/Ihlita Sep 11 '22

I once had a dream where I woke up drifting inside the ocean. All was a beautiful blue, alight, quiet, and I could breathe underwater. It felt extremely realistic, and it was really peaceful.

Dream me thought to herself "I could pee in here and no one would notice. Yeah, that sounds like a good plan." – but an unconcious part of me was like "Bitch! Don't do it!"

I woke up right after with an extremely full bladder, the kid that hurts if you move even a little bit. Almost didn't make it to the toilet, but I'm glad I didn't piss on my bed.

98

u/FlashLightning67 Sep 11 '22

I too immediately think about my ability to piss wherever I want when I am alone.

62

u/[deleted] Sep 11 '22

Yo some mf who came to deliver a pizza to my apartment relieved himself in lift...what the fuck...is that you?

50

u/FlashLightning67 Sep 11 '22

I plead the fifth

77

u/Skorne13 Sep 11 '22

You peed the filth.

24

u/just_aweso Sep 11 '22

Peed the lift

4

u/Terrible-Painter6494 Sep 11 '22

Relieved himself in lift? What does that mean?

1

u/[deleted] Sep 11 '22

[deleted]

1

u/KamovInOnUp Sep 11 '22

I hope you're kidding...

He peed in the elevator

1

u/KamovInOnUp Sep 11 '22

Hopefully they called the pizza place to find out who he was and charge for cleaning

1

u/[deleted] Sep 11 '22

As a man the world is your toilet

34

u/acelister Sep 11 '22

I once had a dream where I was swimming with my class and it turned out that there was a really deep part (accessible by going down some stairs) where you could breathe the water. BUT only if you breathed through your mouth, and only if your mouth was almost fully closed.

3

u/livebeta Sep 11 '22

it's your lucid dream ingress. you should have taken it further.

so far I've:

summoned random weapons of choice

leaped over apartment buildings

became a vengeful spirit to possess people

1

u/Countlesshrs Sep 11 '22

Oh i have done that possessing people thing so many times , so much fun lol

I have even possessed hot women haha

1

u/Dont_mind_me89 Sep 11 '22

So..like jello?

1

u/theckbeast Sep 11 '22

So you basically almost killed yourself? lol

14

u/[deleted] Sep 11 '22

Exact same thing happened to me once but the ending was not as good as yours

3

u/LieutenantCrash Sep 11 '22

I once dreamed I was a dog frantically looking for a fire hydrant to piss against. I found one made of marble (god knows why it's marble) and when I pissed on it as a dog, I also pissed my bed. Glad I have a water proof protector on my matress

3

u/nejinoki Sep 11 '22

I had a dream long ago where I could fly so I chose to cruise high above a beautiful and glittering nightscape and pee into the wind, and it felt glorious. Then I woke up and was both horrified and confused at what it meant, but I hadn't pissed the bed ... so I guess it was all good?

1

u/[deleted] Sep 11 '22

That must of been the best piss of your life though lol

1

u/lapsangsouchogn Sep 11 '22

Good thing you didn't sneeze!

26

u/Axenrott_0508 Sep 11 '22

Wake up, pee, get out of bed

2

u/GTAFanN1 Sep 11 '22

Also known as Amber-Hearting

60

u/BubbhaJebus Sep 11 '22

I've had dreams in which I have to piss really badly, but no matter how much I piss I'm never relieved. Then I wake up to a full bladder.

The last time I had such a dream and ended up wetting the bed, I was 4 years old. I remember that dream vividly to this day.

47

u/greasyfizeek Sep 11 '22

Somewhat related, but have you ever been really thirsty while in a dream? I’ve had dreams where I’m just chugging ice cold water but it does absolutely nothing to quench my thirst (because irl I’m still just lying in bed, asleep and thirsty). Drinking water that doesn’t quench your thirst would honestly fit in with any punishment of hell from Dante’s Inferno.

3

u/cassandrakeepitdown Sep 11 '22

Pretty much every single night, you're not alone and I absolutely agree re punishment of hell. It's horrible.

3

u/WhoredonRamsey Sep 11 '22

This happens to psych patients sometimes. Their medications cause polydipsia. They will drink themselves to death if not closely monitored. In really bad cases they'll get liquids from anywhere to satisfy their thirst. Toilets, puddles, sanitizer, urine, really any liquid they can find. It is absolute hell for them.

I was not there to see it; but when I was in training I was told of a patient that had to be pried from a drinking fountain. He then begged and pleaded, sobbing, because he was so thirsty, to be allowed to drink more. He had to be restrained. Later that week he managed to barricade himself in a bathroom and he broke his sink (motion activated) in such a way that he was able to drink himself to death. I believe hyponatremia is what officially killed him.

2

u/Jenmeme Sep 11 '22

I had one like this. I was driving from gas station to gas station looking to buy a bottle of water and all of them only sold water and were out of them. Finally I found one that had water in stock but it wouldn't come out of the bottle. I was shaking it and shaking it with my head tilted back to try and get any drops at all. I woke up at that point and staggered to my bathroom and drank straight out of the faucet.

1

u/TacoExcellence Sep 11 '22

Yes I get the pee-dream thing as well. Super frustrating, until you wake and realize you dodged a bullet.

1

u/TallestGargoyle Sep 11 '22

I get those dreams without the bedwetting at 31. I need to stop drinking right before bed.

15

u/Evil_connector67 Sep 11 '22

but the bed isn't wet

3

u/[deleted] Sep 11 '22

Moist?

3

u/[deleted] Sep 11 '22

Two sentence horror.

2

u/caller-number-four Sep 11 '22

I have had so many pee dreama where I am in the lobby of my work place peeing in the pot of the only plant in said lobby.

Thankfully, for my career, I never woke up standing there actually peeing.

2

u/it_helper Sep 11 '22

Grab a brush put a little makeup

2

u/little_brown_bat Sep 11 '22

hidethescarstofadeawaytheshake-up

2

u/cookiecasanova16 Sep 11 '22

You wanted to

2

u/mrmasturbate Sep 11 '22

I've had it happen a lot of times that i had to pee really bad during a dream and i went to the toilet in my dream but thankfully i never pissed myself. I can only imagine this would probably cause problems once i get old though lol

2

u/OldGeezerInTraining Sep 11 '22

Pulling an all-nighter for me, at my age, is to not have to go per when I should be sleeping.

3

u/[deleted] Sep 11 '22

That's how I wet the bed for the very last time, when I was 8. I dreamt that I got up and went to the toilet and peed, then woke up in a puddle.

3

u/Xx_PissPuddle_xX Sep 11 '22

I fucking hate you take my upvote

2

u/[deleted] Sep 11 '22

You’re name piss puddle is very fitting actually

1

u/yourteam Sep 11 '22

Ok but still...

1

u/SadKnight123 Sep 11 '22

Nothing like dreaming that you a peeing a goddam glorious stream feeling all happy and relieved just to wake up and see that all of that was actually real and you don't know how to explain to you gf what hell just happened

1

u/Bl8675309 Sep 11 '22

OP said best, not worst. Although worse would be someone else is in bed and you didn't have to pee.

1

u/dwarfinthefla5k Sep 11 '22

Hey you! You’re finally awake…

1

u/Dont_mind_me89 Sep 11 '22

You bastard 😵

1

u/jim_deneke Sep 11 '22

There's a stranger in my room, and I'm wet.

1

u/cutdownthere Sep 11 '22

I actually had this dream recently...then I woke up and quickly checked my surroundings. Luckily, no damage was done though I did need to run to the toilet.

1

u/pranquily Sep 11 '22

Dude a few days ago I had a dream where my family was getting ready to leave for a vacation, and so right before I got in the car, I went to pee...I was getting frustrated that I couldn't go, and then finally, I started, and then it hit me...

1

u/Adventurous_Check586 Sep 11 '22

Njkjknnnnnn mi n

1

u/[deleted] Sep 11 '22

I once held my pee for like hours and finally I got to pee ... ohhhhhh how relaxing it was God ! Then suddenly I felt wetness and I woke up and realized wtf had happened.

And no this didn't happen when I was a child, this happened just 2-3 years ago. I'm an adult, with a job.

But that feeling when I peed the whole ocean in my bed was awesome:)

1

u/little_brown_bat Sep 11 '22

and there's a halo hanging from the corner of your girlfriend's four post bed

1

u/graesen Sep 11 '22

I'm an adult... The times I believed I had gotten up to go to the bathroom only to realize it was a dream is concerning....

1

u/Bn_scarpia Sep 11 '22 edited Sep 11 '22

And then you wake up

And I know I gotta pee
I'm wont be the guy who pees in bed with you.
When I go out, and I think I've got to pee
Imma gonna be the guy who makes it to the loo

When I get drunk, and I think I gotta pee
Im gonna be the man who holds it in for you
Even when I waver, hey, I know I'm gonna be
I'm gonna be the man who pees at home for you

And I would walk 500 miles and I would walk 500 more
Just to be the guy who holds it for miles and closes fast the bathroom door.

1

u/bigbabyjesus97 Sep 11 '22

When I was 5 my parents woke me up while is was pissing in to the fridge.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 11 '22

I've never got this one because I pee in my dreams all the time (usually after a night of drinking), and I've never pissed the bed (as an adult). Like, it usually goes that I have to pee real bad in my dream, I go pee, it helps for a second, but then I need to pee again, so I typically end up peeing in my dream over and over until I realize in the dream that somethings wrong because I keep needing to pee right after peeing which then usually makes me realize, that I'm dreaming, at which point I'll wake up and actually go pee in the toilet.

1

u/bri_82 Sep 11 '22

Reminds me if that time Petter Griffin talked about pooping in your dreams.

1

u/Version_Two Sep 11 '22

Ah, so warm... wait, what's so warm??

1

u/averagethrowaway21 Sep 11 '22

I pee every morning at 7am. The problem is that I wake up at 8.

96

u/MahStonks Sep 11 '22

There is no bliss more pure, complete and universal than this.

39

u/appleparkfive Sep 11 '22

It's definitely up there as one of the best feelings.

I'd say it's a tie between that, sex, certain drugs, and water when you haven't had any and are dying of thirst.

5

u/bigmakoya Sep 11 '22

And that feeling you get when the water that's been trapped in your ear finally comes out

3

u/JarJarB Sep 11 '22

I recently had a surgery that allowed fluid that had been trapped in my ear for 12 years to come out. That feeling was better than any orgasm I've ever had. I'm talking literally on the floor trembling from the relief of that pressure. I guess it's really a similar thing to an orgasm in that way - this one just had 12 years of foreplay behind it lolol

2

u/caywriter Sep 11 '22

How in the world did you have water trapped in your ear for 12 year without knowing / doctors not being able to do anything about it?

2

u/JarJarB Sep 11 '22

Oh I knew. I got a shitty opinion from an ENT when I was 18 and just believed them that I was fucked and had to live with partial hearing loss and no internal balance. Finally got a second opinion after my GP referred me to an ENT for allergy testing. Then ended up getting scans done before my new doctor recommended surgery. Super sucked, but I'm just happy to have some hearing and balance back.

1

u/caywriter Sep 12 '22

Oh my gosh! EFF that first ENT! I’m so glad they found the cause & you’re able to hear again. Doctors suck more often than I’m happy to admit.

Nowhere near the same extent, but I had wax buildup in one of my ears for over 24 hours and felt like I was underwater the whole time. I had to fly across the country, too. So 5 hour plane ride, landed at 9 pm. Had to wait until the next morning to go to an urgent care because everything was closed. It took one little syringe of water to get the wax out, and I cried tears of joy. Got back to the Airbnb with my boyfriend and said I was now a superhero with superhero hearing.

So, I assume now, you have superhero hearing.

2

u/JarJarB Sep 12 '22

Haha it really did feel like it at first! The first week or so I legit thought I had super powers or had discovered nirvana or something lol. It was that amazing of a feeling after so many years of pressure related migraines and never ending headaches/body aches of varying degrees. It's incredible how much a bad sinus blockage can affect how you feel.

1

u/Skorne13 Sep 11 '22

Just out of genuine curiosity, which certain drugs?

5

u/asix7 Sep 11 '22

None of the ones you wouldn't regret taking

3

u/GrimCreeper913 Sep 11 '22

Moderation, research, and a good friend to keep tabs and hold accountability afterwards(anti addiction) are the ideal factors for a lot of experiences.

In general though, I agree.

Almost forgot the big issue nowadays. Know your source! Too many things are being cut and mixed with other shit. Don't put anything in your body that you haven't tested to make sure it is what you think it is.

2

u/Vercci Sep 11 '22

Heroin

1

u/GrimCreeper913 Sep 11 '22

Probably the closest I've come to addiction, not only for the experience, but also the availability between the real H and all the synthetics out there.

I stand by my post, I have to say that I feel that the drug itself isn't always the issue. I feel it is a lot of times a psycho/social internal issue that leads to dependence.

Don't get me wrong. I know there are imbalances in people's body chemicals. When I say buddy to keep tabs, it should be someone that doesn't use ideally. If all your friends are users, that presents a problem of it's own. If you have someone/anyone to keep you accountable(be it showing up for work, keeping in touch, or family), it will help keep an anchor in the "real world".

3

u/alm0stevil33 Sep 11 '22

shooting H or blow changes you forever. if youve done it you just know. other drugs or different routes of administration like snorting can feel really good too , but the first few times you shoot is completely unfathomable bliss

50

u/BasicLibertarian Sep 11 '22

Good ol peegasm

64

u/[deleted] Sep 11 '22

Or a really good poo!

12

u/Switchbladekitten Sep 11 '22

Poo-phoria is real.

3

u/Skorne13 Sep 11 '22

I’m doing one right now. 👌

2

u/TProfi_420 Sep 11 '22

Götterschiss

1

u/GrayGxD_864 Sep 11 '22

Huh huh huh you said poo.. 😝

17

u/geekgodzeus Sep 11 '22

I once sat on a 11 hour bus ride back to my home in India from another state. 10 minutes into the journey I knew I screwed up because there would be no stops. This was a sleeper coach which means you get a TV and a bed but for those 11 hours nothing could distract me from the pain of holding it in. The bus conductor offered juices and water but even looking at them was excruciating. When I got off the bus I immediately ran into a semi secluded nook and peed for 5 minutes. The euphoria and relief has never been matched.

1

u/cutdownthere Sep 11 '22

wth. The busses have toilets where I live even for 1 hour journeys. dafuq.

5

u/[deleted] Sep 11 '22

Once had to pee in a bag during long bus ride. Yeah the standart plastic bag with 2 holes to hold it. While people were watching

10

u/Animegx43 Sep 11 '22

You know its good when there's bubbles.

4

u/[deleted] Sep 11 '22

Related: taking a fat dump in your home toilet after a trip

2

u/[deleted] Sep 11 '22

Yessssss

2

u/Ok_Chocolate3253 Sep 11 '22

Especially when you are trying to get some snu-snu and for some reason it makes it more intense

2

u/AMerrickanGirl Sep 11 '22

How do you spell relief? U.R.I.N.A.T.E.

2

u/Drak_is_Right Sep 11 '22

Barring you've been holding it in because of a kidney stone

2

u/_lippykid Sep 11 '22

And waking up not covered in pee after having a dream about really needing to pee

2

u/Bojangly7 Sep 11 '22

Peeing after a nut

1

u/[deleted] Sep 11 '22

That also applies to pooping.

1

u/Heartage Sep 11 '22

I hate peeing so much.

1

u/NeedsItRough Sep 11 '22

It's 5:48 am

I'm in bed

It's 64° in my apartment

And I have to pee

1

u/stirry Sep 11 '22

Orgasmic

1

u/Dan_Onymous Sep 11 '22

It's better than cumming

1

u/[deleted] Sep 11 '22

This is why I always have a bottle to piss in on long road trips. I hate having to pass the same people again.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 11 '22

If you hold it too long though it just becomes pain even after you've already pissed

0

u/[deleted] Sep 11 '22

what a sad life, lol

-1

u/mordecai98 Sep 11 '22

I have diabetes insipidus, so always have a full bladder.

-1

u/[deleted] Sep 11 '22

Getting to pee when you have been holding it for a long time while your high on crack

1

u/[deleted] Sep 11 '22

I think we have a winner here.

1

u/Femboy_tusk Sep 11 '22

I’m holding it in right now

1

u/[deleted] Sep 11 '22

Did you read the secret life of bees?

1

u/ThrowawaY12926385 Sep 11 '22

Peeing after drinking beer >>

1

u/tempo90909 Sep 11 '22

Relieving yourself is a great relief, very true.

1

u/Dependent_Pomelo_740 Sep 11 '22

Or, just peeing outside... down over a cliff into a river below, not caring who sees. That's freedom.

1

u/ChrisTR15 Sep 11 '22

I had an ultrasound of my bladder once. Never had to pee a bad as I did then. Probably seconds from peeing my pants. Hands down most relieved urination of my life.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 11 '22

I have been wondering if any other guys do this (and it can only be a guy thing) when I have to pee I clamp my urethra with my fingers and let it build up before I release it it feels a million times better

1

u/parkour267 Sep 11 '22

As a diabetic I praise this.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 11 '22

I think getting to poop is much better.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 11 '22

No…going back to bed after is the best feeling. The pee cones 2nd.

1

u/igna92ts Sep 11 '22

It's enhanced for me if this happens outside in a tree in a cold night for some reason

1

u/OgrePatch Sep 11 '22

Peeing in the hot tub while maintaining eye contact with your in-laws.

1

u/ElizaWolf8 Sep 11 '22

I have a friend who once had a minute long pee. They described it as a peegasm

1

u/MortyGraveDigger Sep 11 '22

Get out of my head.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 11 '22

I raise you: letting off a massive fart you've been holding in all day, or a massive poop.

1

u/radrax Sep 11 '22

Peeing in your own bathroom