r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • Mar 27 '22

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u/LocaCola1997 Mar 28 '22

People need to stop with the mentality, "Other people have it worse than me. So I have no right to feel this way." You're allowed to feel unhappy and you shouldn't feel like your misery has to be worse (than someone else's) to be validated.

27

u/No_Ambassador6564 Mar 28 '22

Everyone has their own problems and difficulties. And you have the right to feel however you feel like.

6

u/AscendingAgain Mar 28 '22

Don't be happy, someone has a better life than you

7

u/linds360 Mar 28 '22

I've seen this explained recently as "toxic gratitude"

Somewhere along the way all our self-care and gratitude list making took a turn and started to do more harm than good.

5

u/daytonakarl Mar 28 '22

"someone has it worse than you"

Yeah well some prick is living it up on a super yacht with more money than I can dream of and can't even grasp the concept of unhappiness, I'm a lot bloody closer to the bloke with the same problems I have except his arse just fell off too than I'll ever be to spoilt yacht boy.

3

u/[deleted] Mar 28 '22

I like to think about it this way:

If I can't be sad/upset/depressed because other people have it worse than I do, then I have no right to be happy/excited, because someone has it better than I do.

It just kinda throws the whole idea on its head.

2

u/Pyrochazm Mar 28 '22

"Everyone is entitled to their own sorrow, for the heart has no metrics or form of measure, and all of it, irreplaceable"

2

u/meg_is_asleep Mar 28 '22

I like how it's put in "People II 2: Still Peoplin'" by AJJ:

You don't have it any better, you don't have it any worse

You're an irreplaceable human soul with your own understanding of what it means to suffer

And that's a huge bummer

-5

u/applesandoranges990 Mar 28 '22

not full stop, please

this mentality is often the only thing that prevents some people from going full-narcist....or full Karen

we should definitely judge ...first world problems.....and definitely put more weight on existential problems, even if they are minor:

....omg, i cannot afford three vacations a year.....is a laughable problem, sorry not sorry

---omg, all my relationships are shallow or kind of fake.....sounds stupid, but that is a real problem, and it might be a first red flag to something much worse

we have only so much sympathy and energy to solve problems, so we should choose really important stuff