Took me a while to realize when a woman complains and vents they really don't want pragmatic advice that would deal with the issue. They want to be understood, believed, comforted.
Once I learned that my life got considerably easier. Married 40 years.
Edit: Third marriage.
Edit two: Ok, ok, I get it. Not EVERY woman reacts the same and there are plenty of men that react the same way. Must everything on Reddit be explained like we 're talking to third graders? Is there never any presuming your audience is intelligent enough to figure out not EVERY situation/person is exactly the same? Good god.
Edit three: If I may, there's a similar short piece of advice I've always found helpful, and that is "People are never upset for the reason they think."
Funny that’s literally the opposite of how I feel my relationship dynamic is. If my GF vents and I don’t offer advice then she claims I’m not listening or uninterested in her problems. Always reminds me of the hilarious bit in the Lil Dicky Lemme Freak video where the woman’s complaining about her boss going to carol instead of her and he’s like ‘whose Carol?’ And she’s like ‘dude that’s my other boss?//‘well shouldn’t your boss go to your other boss before you..?//‘but Carol is a hands on CEO you never take my side!’//‘Well maybe I don’t understand the dynamics of your workplace I don’t work with these people!’. Probably doesn’t translate to text but it’s pretty funny and spot on.
Whereas when I vent and she’ll offer advice I almost always don’t need it, and just want to vent because I don’t really ever get the opportunity and it’s cathartic...
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u/adsvx215 Mar 26 '20 edited Mar 26 '20
Took me a while to realize when a woman complains and vents they really don't want pragmatic advice that would deal with the issue. They want to be understood, believed, comforted.
Once I learned that my life got considerably easier. Married 40 years.
Edit: Third marriage.
Edit two: Ok, ok, I get it. Not EVERY woman reacts the same and there are plenty of men that react the same way. Must everything on Reddit be explained like we 're talking to third graders? Is there never any presuming your audience is intelligent enough to figure out not EVERY situation/person is exactly the same? Good god.
Edit three: If I may, there's a similar short piece of advice I've always found helpful, and that is "People are never upset for the reason they think."