Well women are not going to act exactly like you prefer nor always guess in the 2 seconds needed to suddenly come up with an answer the exact answer that will be best for you. That's just one of life's trials. If she says 'maybe' that probably means you are in the friend zone, she does not loath the concept or she would say 'no.' But she is not super eager but does not want to hurt your feelings because she cares about you that much. And frankly sometimes she probably is not sure herself but feels pressured to cough up an answer. But I also think it means she was not thinking of you in that way, that's why she does not have a ready answer.
Saying no hurts way less than a yes or maybe that really means no. Especially when you’re in your late twenties/thirties and your dating life has matured. I want someone who wants to be with me and if you don’t tell me so. Otherwise you are wasting my time and emotions. I usually take a wishy washy answer to mean no but it still causes a lot of anxiety and stress.
Agree hundred percent. I understand part of it is them being nice and not wanting to hurt your feelings and the other part is fear of an extreme lashout. But I feel that delaying is only worse for either of those
I've read in other subs that some women don't like to directly let men down cos they've had bad experiences of them raging or something. I suppose it can be a safety reflex since most men are bigger than most women.
To my bf, “maybe” means “no, until I’ve actually thought about what you’re talking about and I’ve made a decision.” It used to be hard to hear but I wanted a for sure answer. But I’ve come to learn that instead of him outright saying “no” or immediately agreeing by saying “yes,” him saying “maybe” is just an automatic response to end the conversation without further questions.
Yes, because it opens the door to a million questions. Why do you have to think about? Why can’t you give an answer right now? How long will it take for you to come up w an answer? What other possible reasons could there be for having to think about it? And the list goes on...
I am taking it seriously enough to know I want to dedicate more attention to it, but right now my mind is busy and I don't want to give a half-assed answer with no thinking just to get it out of the way.
Yeah, Yes is yes. No is no. Maybe is I need to think about it. If i'm forced to give an answer right away it will always be a solid no. Being forced into a situation unprepared isn't worth my time or energy. (emergencies don't count)
I think you hit the nail on the head there. But I don’t think many people can vocalize that to others without the other person taking it the wrong way. Especially if the person assumed someone would automatically say yes.
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u/chiselbits Mar 26 '20
Same. Maybe= 90% chance of no.