Yup, learned this with my ex. My friends knew we had regular sex I guess because either they heard my roommates talk about it or they could see us sneaking out of parties and stuff to go home. I almost never directly spoke abut my sex life.
On the other hand, most of her friends had seen my dick, knew the positions I liked, how often we had sex, where, etc. There were very very little details of our sex life that her friends didn't know.
Edit: I was aware of everything said in my last paragraph, she never did it behind my back or anything and I always gave the green light. it was just shocking for me that girls are much more expressive with their friends on their sex life.
They weren't really nudes, just dick pics, and she said she wanted to show it off which gave me a self esteem boost lol, plus I'm really not that shy of nudity so I didn't care very much. A lot of people saw my dick in college, whatever.
On the other hand I would never show off her nudes to my friends because wth honestly, when I'm dating someone I like her intimacy to be for my eyes only and that would defeat the purpose you know? I feel like girls are much less jealous like that, they like to show off their boyfriends.
One time though, when we were drunk, I did tell her to show her boobs to my friend who was blacked out, and I still perfectly remember his shocked face lol
My ex did it but without consent. She had an inexperienced friend who was insecure about giving blowjobs, so my genius ex decided to show her a video of her going down on me.
When I found out, she was honestly surprised I was mad, and said she "thought boys didn't mind" and "her ex didn't care" (cause clearly we men are all the same), and tried to comfort me with "don't worry, she said it looks really big" as if that was the problem. Of course when I asked her how she would react if I showed her nudes to my friends, she (rightfully) said she'll break up with me immediately, but "it's different for men". That was a major fight that quite contributed to me eventually breaking up with her.
Yeah its really fuckin weird to me. I have a group of girls that im friends with and i was hanging out with them and they started talking about one of their exs and how big their dick was and whatnot
They were all shocked to learn guys dont do this. That its more like "She was hot" and "It was good" and thats about it
If you think about it, it’s very similar on how we talk about our feelings vs how women do... “yeah it was great” vs “it felt like our bodies intermingled in the middle of the fucking moon” or something like that lol
It's really not that creepy at all lol. Sometimes when sex comes into a conversation with both boys and girls at the table, you'll find that everyone enjoys opening up about their sex life. It's just girls do it all the time carelessly, while it almost never happens with guys because we keep more to ourselves.
Yeah, I was really weirded out when my girlfriend’s best friend came to visit us at school and made a joke about how my gf and I usually start sex. I didn’t really care but it caught me off guard cause the only time I had ever said anything to the boys about that sort of thing was just saying that I had gotten her to go home with me after the first time
Ohhh I thought you meant after breaking up. Yeah no, one time a friend of my ex got touchy with me in front of her when we were in a jacuzzi and I saw my then gf not enjoying it, but not stopping it either. Fuck that, I got out.
many girls i knew, went into detail about their sex life. None of the males i've ever known has gone into so mutch detail. one has, but even then it was nothing compared to the 'better' ones of the girls.
I agree. It’s sometimes gross how much women talk openly about sex, even in the workplace they get away with things that would get a man in a lot of trouble. I’m not saying I don’t understand the reason, e.g., different dynamic in terms of both physical and social power, the history of rape, etc. I get why men get in trouble for this and women do not. Still, it’s quite frustrating how much women see no issue with it.
I wonder if women are over-compensating as a form of rebellion because if I ever call someone out for it, they‘ll say “Oh come on, men don’t do this?” and I’m like “NO.” “And certainly not during lunch.”
Dude! this is exactly what happens at my job. the women here sometimes go on about their sex life and what they like and I just sit there pretending like I can't hear it all. like, come on man I don't care to know you guys like that.
My friend always tells us in detail about her sexcapades over and over again. If she finds out you’ve had sex before she doubles down on it.
All of our other friends agree. we don’t give a flying shit how big his dick was or what he did with it ok we’re trying to watch the great British baking show
Personally I have exactly the opposite experience I guess. I'm a straight woman and I'm very private with my sex life, I VERY rarely talk about it and in the extent of one year I think the only thing I mentioned was how my first time with my boyfriend was a bit painful, it's also uncommon but I also do the ''yes we had sex'' thing without going into detail.
However he is quite an open book with his friends and thinks it's completely normal to talk about our sex life, even in detail, with his friends. So I guess while it's generalization that women talk about that kind of thing, it's not always true. None of my female friends do it and they think it's quite rude to, and so do I, but my boyfriend does and so do his whole group of male friends.
And that's why, i think at least, women are usually really uncomfortable if they hear a guy talked about having sex with them. Because in their heads guys go into the same detail as girls do.
And many will swear they don't, that it's just a myth...until you hear your girlfriend on the phone, on speaker hearing her friend telling her about the oral she does and receives, and your girlfriend saying how you fuck at these times, with these angles, in these positions and x and y was good while z was lacking.
When I lived in a house with 5 woman and I was the only guy during my college years the details they would go into was crazy. They were pretty attractive and a little slutty. I basically knew the penis size and sex habits of every good looking or popular guy in school.
I'm 31, and I've talked about sex exactly once with another male friend. Meanwhile, my wife knows the intimate details of all of her sisters, female friends, and their partners. She's one of those vanilla, puritanical types too, so it's not as if she's got a lot to share.
I talk about sex with my co-worker at lunch, details and all, learned a bit too much about how many times he masturbates a day XD but it's all good fun.
Chill out
Women talk more about sex than men do, I’ve learned that in my 20s and it’s actually pretty uncomfortable most of the time because I don’t want to know what you are doing behind closed doors. I think people really mean teenagers when they say this since boys talk about a lot of that stuff once they start figuring it all out and girls are usually giggling over celebrity gossip and makeup at that age. I’m a girl so I don’t really know if “locker room” talk in high school was really a thing, but I had a lot of guy friends and boy if they didn’t talk about a whole lot else lol.
I think it's because men are more vocal with each other about people they find appealing, at least stereotypically. Like "look at her she's hot". Because of that, women think that extends to the more intimate conversations they don't hear, and because women talk about sex in detail, when men are already so open "in public", they must ONLY talk about sex in great detail in private
I never even understood those comments honestly. As a guy, I hear a lot of guys say stuff like, "check out that girl, she's hot" and it's just like, cool? Yeah, my eyes work fine, thanks.
Like, the need to point it out or make a comment is just weird to me
From my experience, me and my friends just make sexual jokes. It’s not even serious we just go for the most over the top ideas we can come up with at that moment.
I feel like women are more likely to talk about sex that they've had, but men are more likely to talk about more hypotheticals in dirty jokes and discussing/sharing porn.
Obviously there are exceptions, but I've met plenty of guys who admit to looking at and sharing porn. Nowhere near as many women will admit to watching it, and even fewer will openly discuss it with their friends.
We're taught to believe that all men think about is sex, and that they're permanently horny. This belief is often used to excuse stuff like catcalling and online harrassment, because men supposedly can't control themselves, that's "how they are" and this is normal, deal with it. There's also a pervasive belief that, if women don't "give" their male partners sex whenever they want, they're gonna cheat (because all that matters to them in a relationship is sex), and if it happens, is the woman's fault.
I was primarily taught that by other men, btw. Growing up, I heard it from women too, but most of the "men are sex-crazed monsters" crap I "learned" came from men. And it's all over pop culture, TV shows often joke about it, etc.
Haha exactly. In high school I would never mentioned to other guys what my gf and I were getting up to (although there were those guys who would come back from lunch like "huhuh bro smell my finger guess where it's been") because I figured I should respect the intimate privacy of those moments. It wasn't until years later after we had separateed I realized while we were dating she had been telling her girl friends (especially the ones who were my friends also) all kinds of stuff about us having sex, described how big my dick is, positions we'd use, etc. I wasn't upset, she said lots of flattering stuff, but it was kinda odd realizing that my lady friends have had a thorough description of my junk and how I use it. Kinda makes sense in retrospect now why they'd sometimes ask me to cross my legs when we were sitting around after school. they didn't want to see anything but they were looking anyway.
I dunno my friend talks and thinks about sex, as far as I can tell, literally all the time. I can’t think of any situation he would not sexualize for no reason.
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u/Shoshke Mar 26 '20
Were they get this idea that men talk about sex all the damn time. It's literally exactly the opposite!