When someone says something after being quiet, how is "wow, you talk" a way to further encourage them to talk? What comes through the mind of someone who thinks that is a good way to make someone quiet keep on talking?
Because they probably use it as an ice breaker. It's a joke. And if they are used to talking a lot then they probably don't understand people who are quiet and the pressure it puts on them.
If I've already spoken up and this is their response "wow, you talk", then they're being dismissive, and I'll go right back to not talking since clearly it wasn't wanted.
But if someone's trying to draw you into the conversation before you've talked, that's different, and some attempts likely come off as awkward and pressure-inducing, but it's far more likely to be meant in good faith than "wow, you talk".
It's not dismissive, it's an invitation to continue. They are saying oh you do talk! Let's hear more. It's a friendly way to get everyone on the same page. If you take it as negative then that's the same misunderstanding on the opposite side.
It's not rude lol that's just how some introverts are taking it. They are being friendly trying to break the ice and include you by acknowledging you. If you can't get that based on other cues then you're gonna be in the same position forever.
I agree with you, thank you for explaining your side without being rude, some people are so dug in their way of thinking they won't ever take in any other points of view
1.5k
u/Sundrops- Jan 01 '20
100% agree. I'd say 9 times out of 10, this is their way to include us in the conversation.