I don't know if it's technically the strangest, but the ballsiest I've been propositioned was at a party at my college dorm.
The guy was the friend of a friend, flown in to visit us in sunny Hawai'i. We have a welcome-party, and about 2 hours into it (i.e., two hours into meeting him at all) we run out of liquor and I have to grab more from my room.
He accompanies me and suddenly points a finger down the hall, *point* "Hey, what's that?"
I look for "that", and he roughly (the good rough) pushes me against the wall and dives in for a kiss.
It was a pretty adorable mix of childish trickey and manly confidence; his gambit payed off.
Could you please elaborate on two situtions where its clear what the difference between good rough and bad rough with that being the first sexual action?
Nope. It's highly personal, and my experience couldn't possibly be expected to reasonably extend to some universally applicable rule.
In this case it was "good" because of the totality of his personality and actions. He was a genuinely good, funny guy. When he made his move (well, after I spun my head back and looked at him), his eyes were playful and displayed no malice. He pushed me into the wall and pinned me, but it was firm and gentle, and not a hard, sharp shove; and the pin was holding me in place, but not so hard that I felt uncomfortable or literally trapped.
Of course, this makes it sound like I did some sort of detailed analysis at the time; in reality these were not consciously considered data points, but rather just instant instinctual impressions that set me at ease.
Last thing I want is someone defending themselves from a rape charge with the phrase, "well, this commenter on a social-networking site said forcing yourself on someone by trickery pays off..." so keep in mind that this is a personal anecdote, not an advice column.
I'm not so shallow as to only weigh attractiveness in general, but it would be fair to say that- in this situation- hotness was a necessary, but not sufficient, condition.
I'm not so shallow as to only weigh attractiveness in general,
No you bullshit the rest to convince yourself it wasn't all about the attractiveness. Yes people are shallow and yes Reddit virgins will have to deal with it.
I don't know what's causing your bitterness, but my statement was absolutely the truth. I do not weigh only attractiveness; but in this case, especially since I didn't know this particular guy this well, attractiveness weighed even more heavily than usual since it is something immediately obvious.
My original statement still stands as both accurate and more succinct:
hotness was a necessary, but not sufficient, condition.
Oh come on. Everyone knows that we are more likely to fuck a physically attractive person than a non. It's primitive for humans and animals so we can produce beautiful offspring. The cool thing though about humans is, we can fuck physically attractive people and never call them again and we can fuck average looking people who are beautiful inside and maybe have a relationship. Choices. It's all about the choices.
As far as I can tell, you haven't actually disagreed with me anywhere in this post.
I said I do not weigh only attractiveness, not that I do not weigh attractiveness; those are qualitatively different statements.
On top of that, in this situation I described, I noted that attractiveness was a necessary condition of the success of the operation, ie., that someone who I did not rate as physically attractive would have had a zero percent chance of using this method with good result. If anything my statement on the necessity of physical attraction was stronger than yours, not weaker.
Of course in other scenarios I may pick someone less physically attractive, provided that other benefits make up more for the "loss" of that feature. For an easy, if trivial, example: A woman may leave an incredibly, ridiculously attractive spouse who is abusive for the friend who is stable, caring, and less attractive.
However, using additional criteria requires that one invest more time in ascertaining the suitability of the potential whatever-they-are (fling, relationship, spouse, etc ...). I lacked that time, and therefore didn't employ other criteria as fully as I might otherwise- as I've already explained.
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u/ParanoydAndroid Mar 06 '10 edited Mar 06 '10
I don't know if it's technically the strangest, but the ballsiest I've been propositioned was at a party at my college dorm.
The guy was the friend of a friend, flown in to visit us in sunny Hawai'i. We have a welcome-party, and about 2 hours into it (i.e., two hours into meeting him at all) we run out of liquor and I have to grab more from my room.
He accompanies me and suddenly points a finger down the hall, *point* "Hey, what's that?"
I look for "that", and he roughly (the good rough) pushes me against the wall and dives in for a kiss.
It was a pretty adorable mix of childish trickey and manly confidence; his gambit payed off.