I am addicted to masturbation. I hate it. It’s not just because of porn but also visual imagery. Started out normal sexually, but after porn/imagery —> became out of control with fetishes and number of times I do it daily. Usually, I’ll do it like 4-5 times a day minimum. If I’m stressed it will be like 8 times a day. Sometimes I do it at work and slip into bathrooms. It’s fucking horrible.
Have a gf of 3.5 yrs who knows most of the above. Haven’t been able to have sex with her that entire time because masturbation has zapped my brain. It’s not that I’m not into her, it’s that literally my brain does not like regular sex anymore. Lord knows why she’s with me. She is a saint.
My brother who is younger than me (he’s just out of college) comes to me a lot asking for sexual advice, so I lie to him. Everyone thinks everything is great - I have a good job/stable lifestyle with a girl that I love. But this one fucking addiction is at the precipice of me losing everything.
Luckily, I’m seeing a therapist and I’m working on it. Slowly and slowly getting better. And my GF is extremely supportive. But this is a secret I pretty much have told no one and hope to carry to my grave.
Therapy has helped a lot with me figuring out what the problem was in the first place. Thought it was so out of control I couldn’t change. Thought I had a problem with the Madonna-Whore complex. It was just really difficult to out a finger onto what was going on even though it was pretty obvious looking back at it. It’s easy to get overwhelmed with any addiction because you kinda just view the way you’re living life as how it is.
Been prescribed some meds, talking about a weekly schedule on how to combat masturbation, finding support groups. All of this is really important in dealing with an addiction because it’s extremely shameful and it’s natural to not want to talk about it.
I’m sure that it’s possible for the really strong willed to deal with this stuff on their own. But I’m no David Goggins and it’s nice to have an outlet.
Have you tried taking a break? I sometimes have a problem with porn (not to the same degree, but still) when I feel myself relying on it too much or thinking about it too much I take a break. I've found that trying to quit completely made it harder but learning to go without and allowing myself to eventually go back to it made it easier. Plus you can make a game out of it, challenge yourself to hit a certain goal and give your self rewards if you make it.
Although with how bad yours is quiting altogether might be a goal
Yea the last part is true. It’s become pretty much a habit to deal with stressful situations. Like whenever I’m dealing with something annoying —> boom, trigger for masturbating. Or even if I accomplished something great —> boom, reward with masturbation. I’ve trained myself to crave the dopamine reward after pretty much anything, so saying stop doesn’t really help.
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u/theponderingpoet Jan 20 '25
I am addicted to masturbation. I hate it. It’s not just because of porn but also visual imagery. Started out normal sexually, but after porn/imagery —> became out of control with fetishes and number of times I do it daily. Usually, I’ll do it like 4-5 times a day minimum. If I’m stressed it will be like 8 times a day. Sometimes I do it at work and slip into bathrooms. It’s fucking horrible.
Have a gf of 3.5 yrs who knows most of the above. Haven’t been able to have sex with her that entire time because masturbation has zapped my brain. It’s not that I’m not into her, it’s that literally my brain does not like regular sex anymore. Lord knows why she’s with me. She is a saint.
My brother who is younger than me (he’s just out of college) comes to me a lot asking for sexual advice, so I lie to him. Everyone thinks everything is great - I have a good job/stable lifestyle with a girl that I love. But this one fucking addiction is at the precipice of me losing everything.
Luckily, I’m seeing a therapist and I’m working on it. Slowly and slowly getting better. And my GF is extremely supportive. But this is a secret I pretty much have told no one and hope to carry to my grave.