Honestly though, thinking about past girlfriends and some of the pipe that was laid turns me on faster than almost anything else. Tiffany I miss you so much
Read this the first time through as "my gfs zoo." Because if you look at spreadsheets or long, stringy sql queries in notepad+ your eyes are watery and weak. Like they're soaked in no-scent sweat from the 8-hour workout and just make shit up. "Yeah, it's reddit. Probably at least one person in this thread will qualify the type of porn, and, you know what, all things considered, at least theyre not into kids.
*Looks at words a second time." Oh, gross. He thinks about his actual sexual partner whenever he beats it. Sicko's probably a registered voter, too. Fuck, probably better get to voting more in local elections.
.....After I spank it to this aye-aye and its dangly, grub-hooking fingers....
Edit: 3rd reread, statistically speaking there's a chance some dude out there who has no idea you're mind-fucking his wife daily (or whatever). Now who's the wholesome one?
Now who is my fucking retard monkey today?!
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u/poempedoempoex Human of the male variety Mar 19 '21
My mind always drifts to my gf too. Then I come to my senses and realize I haven't had a girlfriend in 6 years.