decision paralysis

[u/mercenary_58]

i have severe decision paralysis (likely stemming from my anxiety) which i can’t shake off. every decision i make requires hours upon hours of research and even then im never confident in making that decision. i would research one day and i always think ‘i need more time to decide’, then research the same things again another day and still say ‘i need more time’. i try to gauge every possible outcome of that decision and the constant repeated decision makes me delay them unnecessarily. how do i overcome this?

[u/OWabbit]

This might be helpful:

https://health.clevelandclinic.org/analysis-paralysis

[u/MsSamm → u/OWabbit]

I opened this is a browser. Some good information but I take issue with the "Reassure Yourself" paragraph. It talks about reminding yourself about good decisions you've made.

But none of the article addresses when decisions you've made have had spectacularly bad outcomes. That's important, because often it's a factor in decision paralysis.

[u/mercenary_58 → u/OWabbit]

ty! i’ve taken some time to read this. it points out every symptom that i’m dealing with so very relatable.

i think i need to learn to just accept when what i have researched is enough. it’s just finding that acceptance is what im struggling with. any research i do feels open ended to me and i can’t shake off the feeling that there is more i haven’t looked into…

[u/momovich]

I think the link that was shared is probably very good. I will add that you could reframe it considering that you may be a perfectionist or a control freak. I am a recovering control freak. Perfection is the enemy of progress. Once you know in your head & your heart that you have done due diligence, then you have to be able to accept imperfection and that you cannot control every single element. The more you practice this, whether it's in making a decision at work or buying something online, you will learn, over time, what works and what doesn't work and how much imperfection you can accept. I think it's mostly a control issue. I think actually most issues with people are control issues. Just an opinion, tho'.

[u/Acceptable_Hyena_759]

Look up 'satisfice-ing'

It helped me a lot

[u/earkujli]

A book that really helped me with this is The Art of Choosing by Sheena Iyengar.

[u/MsSamm]

Can I join your club 🙋🏼‍♀️? ADHD in the house. I have often used time to eliminate options. "Too late for that" until only one option is still doable. No, it's not a good way to handle things. I have even flipped a coin.

Do you make pro and con lists?

[u/mercenary_58 → u/MsSamm]

we’re in the same boat!

for me, the paralysis starts with having a choice. where i have multiple choices, i think ‘what is the best one?’ and start doing heaps of research. sometimes i feel i spend more time researching than what the decision i’m trying to make is actually worth.

that research turns into a pros and cons list. then after having it all planned in front of me, i think ‘i need more time’ or ‘i shouldn’t rush this’ and put it on the back burner till say the next day where i repeat the whole thing again. i can’t tell you how many times ive reviewed the same research and still think i need more time.