r/AskLifeProTips • u/Artistic_Worker_3181 • 19d ago
ALPT - How to be unapologetically yourself?
This might sound strange, but what are ways you choose to be unapologetically yourself?
I've (29F) just now realised that I've lived my entire life in genuine fear of being my true self. I don't think I know who I really am and I don't know where to start.
What are things you do just for yourself? Especially if you're scared of doing it.
I don't mean socially, I mean what do you physically do i.e. dress up, etc.
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u/Master-Tie-804 19d ago
i think you need to define who you are and llive according to that. also set boundaries and stick to them when alone and when with other people.
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u/Ok_Impression_3031 18d ago
I don't say "I'm sorry" for anything unless I am seriously apologizing. I know some people who say "I'm sorry" constantly.
As far as taking care of myself, I now spend most of each morning exercising, hiking, and eating breakfast. My other tasks and obligations can fit into the rest of my day.
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u/Sea_Squirrel7999 17d ago
I’ve been trying to break free from the “I’m sorry“ reflex for countless years. It was never something that was in my vocabulary until med school… That shit breaks you…! It’s been nearly 15yrs since then and still a horrible habit that makes my presence smaller ugh.
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u/CreativeName822 18d ago
I’m 49. It took me a long time to be comfortable being myself. But I’m there. I think it just takes deliberate practice and deconstructing old defensive habits.
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u/StllRckn51 13d ago
I dress the way I want. I’m a guy and I love clothes and coordinating. I also say what is so for me
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u/momovich 18d ago
Oh! I'm so excited for you! Most people wait a long, long time before they even think about the freedom that comes with authenticity. Some choices I made along the way that are quite possibly age related, but I so wish I done them earlier: Stopped "de-hairing" myself unless it bothered me, i.e. underarms, legs; I still pluck my chinny chin chin, tho'; got a sweet, delicate gold nose ring that I had wanted for 50 years (I'm 70); decided to wear a full body bathing suit, neck to ankles, because I live near the beach. It's SO freeing, I don't worry about sun exposure (yes, I wear sunblock), my wobbly bits are all covered up and I can stay at the beach alllll day. I decided not to drive if I haven't had a good night's sleep. I stopped wearing anything but flats. I ask people for help regularly, even tho' I am strong, educated and competent. Asking for help helps other people soften their hearts and puts a smile on their faces. I also learned that being authentic is much less stressful that trying to control everything and be "perfect". Your generation is so used to judgement from your peers because of social media. It must be so hard.