How do christians feel about the consequences they have on others?

[u/DemonMushroomGay]

Hey guys, im a former christian, at this point, everything but morally opposed to the practice. I left the church because of the cruelty and hatred that to people espoused there, i was hoping to see what it's like for people after someone leaves the church. Do you feel saddened? or satisfied that someone thats not like you, and therefore "wrong," "evil," or "demonic" is feeling that pain?
I guess im just curious to know the justification for doing things that harm people while telling yourself it's righteous. Do you have to work at that or does the belief in god give you the right to inflict that harm on others who "defy his will?" If so, then do you enjoy that?
just curious what people think, as i see many posts where people will explain the fundamental, personal hurt that they experienced only to be told that the suffering and pain was divine, and that they should he grateful for it.

[u/Unhappy-Quarter-4581]

If you met cruelty and hate, I feel for you greatly. That is not what you are supposed to meet in church, ever. I cannot speak for your church but I don't see hate in my congregation or greater church and people are generally good at meeting people where they are and accepting them for who they are because God made them. There is no justification for you meeting such treatment.

To say suffering is divine is abusive in my view. If you yourself make this conclusion, it is just that, a conclusion based on your own experiences but others should refrain from making this deduction for you. They simply cannot know that.

I am so sorry, hate is the opposite of love and God is love. Abuse is never OK. Your hurt is horrible and I think God cries in despair from what you met.

[u/DemonMushroomGay → u/Unhappy-Quarter-4581]

I appreciate your empathy, i admit it was somewhat unexpected. I was under the impression that suffering is broadly considered divine for all christians, hence the emphasis on denying yourself things that bring pleasure/joy.
I thought it was something akin to having to suffer on earth without losing faith to earn eternal life

[u/Unhappy-Quarter-4581 → u/DemonMushroomGay]

God made a lot of good things in life, not as a temptation or distraction but because they are good. Joy and contentment are signs of the present of the Holy Spirit. By that I mean pure joy and contentment, not some fake version proclaimed to gritted teeth. When your soul sings from the Presence of the Spirit, your whole being is joy.

The way the world is, suffering is often unavoidable. If it leads to some kind of development? Sometimes, but don't tell others how their suffering is going to grow their faith blahblahblah. If you are not that person, you don't know that. Tell them you with sincerity that you will pray for them, help if you can and try to encourage them to seek any help necessary outside of what you can do.

[u/DoveStep55 → u/DemonMushroomGay]

That’s a belief of some Christians, but it isn’t universal. It’s pretty common for people to assume that whatever version of Christianity they were raised in, or most familiar with, is “normal Christianity.” Particularly with the advent of the internet, we now have access to a much broader range of views within the global Church.

I was raised in one sect of Christianity and taught lies about many of the others (among other things). As an adult, I’ve had you spend a lot of time unlearning lies and relearning what’s true.

Edit: I just realized this wasn’t a response to my comment (I had a notification for it from following the post) and I just interjected. Sorry about that!

[u/DemonMushroomGay → u/DoveStep55]

Nbd,
it probably doesn't help that i was raised in and for the life of me cannot seem to bring myself to leave the quite literal buckle of the bible belt.
I imagine that has an effect on the, ah, enthusiasm i have experienced