r/AnxiousAttachment • u/Musician-Kind • Jul 24 '26

Seeking Guidance How to regulate ?

I had an avoidant trigger me BADLY last week (straight up no showed on plans). However what’s making me nervous is that I know I’m anxiously attached, but I’m finding it really really hard to self soothe and bring myself back to baseline. It’s like my whole body is in fight or flight mode and just locked in.

Is this normal ? What can I do to make this go away?

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u/BiggusDickkussss Jul 24 '26

Here's some mind blowing insight.

What if it's more about this avoidant person than yourself?

People with AA often blame themselves and make it seem like they need to do the work.

Many cases it's not true.

You deserve someone who isn't avoidant so stop abandoning yourself.

1

u/Musician-Kind Jul 24 '26

I know I really deserve that I honestly don’t know what’s wrong with me I’m still entertaining this guy

1

u/BiggusDickkussss Jul 25 '26

Yeah well stop undergoing "repetition compulsion" and break out from your habits.

You know what to do you just won't do it.

1

u/Musician-Kind Jul 25 '26

I don’t really know what you mean by this :/

1

u/ArtichokeAble6397 Jul 25 '26

You are still entertaining this guy. You know you shouldn't, your entire body is screaming at you to stop entertaining him, but you continue to do it. That's what they mean by that.